Losing Virginity Jokes
104 losing virginity jokes and hilarious losing virginity puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about losing virginity that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Losing Virginity Short Jokes
Short losing virginity jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The losing virginity humour may include short lost virginity jokes also.
- Losing my virginity was like my first football game. It hurt a lot but at least my dad came.
- The average age to lose your virginity is 17 years old I'm finally above average for something
- I just read the average age to lose your virginity is 17 years old. I'm finally above average for something.
- Losing my virginity was a lot like my first football game There was blood and snot everywhere, but at least my dad came
- Losing my virginity was a lot like riding a bike for the first time. My dad was holding me from behind.
- What does a young girl from Arkansas say just before she loses her virginity? "Careful, dad, don't crush my smokes."
- Learning to ride a bike is like losing your virginity... No matter how many years go by, you never forget the feeling of your dads hands on your shoulders as he pushes.
- Losing my virginity was a lot like when I first learned how to ride a bike. My father had his hands on my shoulders.
- Losing my virginity was a lot like learning to ride my bike My dad was behind me the whole way.
- At what age did Chuck Norris lose his virginity? Trick question, Chick Norris never loses!
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Losing Virginity One Liners
Which losing virginity one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with losing virginity? I can suggest the ones about virgins and virgin boy.
- An average person loses virginity at the age of 17 I always knew I was above average
- Why I haven't lost my virginity? Because I never lose.
- How did Helen Keller lose her virginity? Somebody left the plunger in the toilet.
- What do you call it when a sailor loses his virginity? First mate.
- My friend was too afraid to lose her virginity So I just gave her a friendly tip
- I asked Santa that i wanted to lose my virginity think i should've been more specific.
- My new years resolution is to lose my virginity I think its time after 85 years
- Getting gilded is like losing your virginity I have yet to experience it...
- Who did the pirate lose his virginity to? His first mate.
- The average person loses their virginity at 17. Congratulations you are above average.
- I'm losing my 30 year old virginity on Halloween. I'm dressing up as a coconut.
- What is the hardest thing to lose my virginity
- How did Helen Keller lose her virginity Granny forgot to remove the plunger.
- Today was the last day I expected to lose my virginity And I was right..
- What does a hacker say when he loses his virginity? I'm in
Losing Virginity Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about losing virginity you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean virgin mother jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make losing virginity pranks.
A hippie in a bus sees a very beautiful lady and he goes to the lady and asks " can I do my way with you? " and the lady replies by saying "sorry i cant so that i am a nun my body and soul belongs to the lord" the hippie then walks away and exits the bus cause they have arrived and his bus stop but gets stopped by the bus driver " you know that nun always goes to the cemetery and prays so you should go there dressed up like jesus and ask her to do your way with her" says the bus driver the hippie says okay and waits till midnight and goes to the cemetery and sees the nun praying then he put his jesus outfit and asks the nun to do her way with her and he shall forgiver her sins and she says yes but do it from behind so i will not lose my virginity and they start to make love and when they were done the hippie rips his outfit of and says surprise its me the hippie! and then the nun rips her dress of and screams surprise its me the bus~driver!
A hippie in a bus sees a very beautiful lady and he goes to the lady and asks " can I do my way with you? " and the lady replies by saying "sorry i cant so that i am a nun my body and soul belongs to the lord" the hippie then walks away and exits the bus cause they have arrived and his bus stop but gets stopped by the bus driver " you know that nun always goes to the cemetery and prays so you should go there dressed up like jesus and ask her to do your way with her" says the bus driver the hippie says okay and waits till midnight and goes to the cemetery and sees the nun praying then he put his jesus outfit and asks the nun to do her way with her and he shall forgiver her sins and she says yes but do it from behind so i will not lose my virginity and they start to make love and when they were done the hippie rips his outfit of and says surprise its me the hippie! and then the nun rips her dress of and screams surprise its me the bus~driver!
A guy and a girl are lying in a room after just having s**....
The girl lays on her side of the bed and rests.
The guy goes to his side of the bed and says to himself, "Man, oh Man I finally did it! I'm no longer a v**...."
The girl overhears him talking to himself and asks, "Are you saying you lost your virginity to me?"
"Well," the guy explains, "I always wanted to wait until I was with the woman I love to lose my virginity."
Astounded, the girl replies,"So you really love me?"
"Oh God no!", the guy says."I just got sick of waiting."
How does a nun lose her virginity?
Dresses up as an altar boy
Cats
I'm going to name my cat Virginity so when he dies I lose my virginity.
A couple of offensive jokes for your enjoyment... note, they are offensive, mmmkay? :)
What is the first thing a r**... girl says after losing her virginity?
*Get off me, pop, you're crushing my cigarettes!*
What did Dodi Al-Fayed say to his driver the night they got killed?
*Do you want to come out with me and Di tonight?*
What's the worst thing about eating vegetables?
*Picking the wheelchair bolts out of your teeth.*
What do you call a h**... with a runny nose?
**Full :)**
Finally...
How do you circumcise a r**... guy?
*You kick his sister in the teeth!*
First Impressions
A young teenage couple have been dating for a little while, so the girl says to the boy that she wants him to meet her parents. He is a little skeptical at this, but she tells him that if he can make a good impression with them that she will reward him with s**....
Extremely excited at the prospect of losing his virginity, the boy rushes to the local pharmacy to get some protection. However, he is a little embarrassed and unsure of himself. The pharmacist at the counter notices this and walks over to see if he can help. "First time?" the pharmacist guesses. The boy nods sheepishly. So the pharmacist gives him the basics on picking condoms. The boy thanks him, buys some, and leaves.
Finally, the big night arrives and the boy arrives at the girl's house. As the couple and the girl's parents sit down for dinner, they all bow their heads to say grace over the meal. Afterwards, they all look up to start eating, except for the boy, who still has his head bowed in prayer. Respectfully, the girl and her parents sit quietly as he continues praying to himself. After about 5 minutes pass, the girl leans over and whispers to him, "I never knew you were so religious!" He looks up at her and whispers back, "I never knew your dad was a pharmacist!"
My mother always scolded me for losing my stuff in school when I was a kid...
That's probably the reason why I can't lose my virginity now.
Riding the Bus for the First Time is Like Losing Your Virginity to a Cheap h**....
You wait around to find a nice taxi, but none appear.And then all of a sudden, you see this giant non-appealing thing lumber towards you. You give up your hopes and pay then fee of 1.50 and enter the massive doors that, over the years have been modified to fit fairly large occupants. For the next 20 or so minutes,it's a very bumpy ride, stop and go. Then you realize there have been elderly, handicapped, both physically and mentally, spewing their b**... fluids everywhere. Then when you get were you needed to go, you immediately regret it. And then you never see the exact same bus again.
If this joke was terrible, it's because it was both original and my first, all let myself out.
What's the difference between a dead h**... and a Ferrari?
I didn't lose my virginity to a Ferrari.
What does a 12 year old r**... girl say when she loses her virginity?
Get off me dad, you're crushing my smokes!
Losing my virginity was like being born again
n**..., soaking wet, crying in the hands of my father...
What's the first thing a h**... says after losing her virginity?
Get off me Daddy, you're crushing my cigarettes.
Losing my virginity was alot like performing a heart transplant operation.
Someone had to die for it to happen.
Why don't Catholics just pray to St. Anthony after they lose their virginity?
How did the nun lose her virginity?
She dressed up as a choir boy.
Hellen Keller Jokes
What's long and black?
every day
How did Hellen Keller lose her virginity?
Someone left a plunger in the toilet
What does a girl from Arkansas say when she loses her virginity?
"Get off me paw, you're crushing my smokes."
Losing your virginity is just like having s**......
... I know nothing about either of them.
How did Jesus lose his virginity?
When he was nailed on the cross.
What did the antisemitic man say right before losing his virginity?
First time. Be gentile.
What does an Arab say after losing his virginity?
Good goat!
"Why is it that some things are so easy to lose while others aren't?"
rued the 30 year old v**... who lost his wallet.
How did the astronaut lose his virginity?
By venturing into the black hole.
Losing your virginity is a lot like learning to ride a bike...
Dad is holding you from behind the whole time
What do you call a person who never loses at anything?
A v**....
When does an average north Indian loses his virginity?
When he spots a tourist.
What's the difference between my virginity and the Apple Airphones?
Losing my virginity wouldn't cost me as much.
"Are you v**..." she said "NO"
"Then you have nothing to lose"
I promised my dad I wouldn't lose my virginity until I was 17.
He'll be on parole by then
What's the worst thing about losing your virginity to a blonde?
If you don't know what hole to put it in, neither do they.
When is the worst age to lose your virginity?
Six.
losing my virginity was a lot like how I learned to ride a bike
My dad having a firm grip on my shoulders .
Where do Republicans go to lose their virginity?
The county fair
My Dad said when I lose my virginity we would sit down and have some beers together.
I can't wait to tell him but I think I'm gonna wait untio tomorrow, it still hurts to sit down.
I like buying my condoms like a ninja losing his virginity.
Fast and discreet.
My first time riding my bike was like losing my virginity....
It was good for about 30 seconds, then it got pretty messy and there was a lot of crying on my part.
What do twenty three year olds losing their virginity have in common?
They are all 3 years old.
When writing a story about losing your virginity,
Its good to always put it in the first person
What did the girl from West Virginia say when she was losing her virginity?
Get off me daddy, you're smooshin' my smokes!
2 friends were talking...
Girl: God d**..., I've lost my keys again!
Boy:Next time, why don't you try putting them near something you can't lose.
Girl: So should I put them next to your virginity?
Congratulations to Prince Harry on losing his virginity
circa AD 2000. It's never too late to celebrate!
Why doesn't Jesus remember losing his virginity?
He was most likely nailed and hammered that day
What does a r**... girl say when she loses her virginity?
Get off me Daddy! You crushing mah cigarettes!
I still haven't lost my virginity.
Because I don't lose.
Redux: what is the difference between my virginity and my will to live?
Once you lose one, you likely won't lose the other.
What makes olive oil lose it's virginity?
Popeye
Getting my first massage was a lot like losing my virginity
I wasn't sure when to get n**..., there were a lot of elbows for some reason, and I bet getting it from a girl would hurt way less.
It takes some people ages to lose their virginity
Not me, I was done in about 12 seconds!
Disney World is like losing your virginity.
You wait ages for a ride and it's over in 30 seconds... or less.
Losing my virginity was a lot like my first baseball game,
very mediocre but at least my dad came.
How does a philosopher lose his virginity?
By getting deep in thot.
OC: I used to treat my 4.0 GPA like my virginity...
I was afraid of losing it to the wrong professor.
Don't feel bad about losing your virginity ladies.
At least you still have the box in came in.
If you lose your virginity...
You're a loser because you lost.
What is something carry but never lose?
my virginity
What's the worst part about losing your virginity?
The Jail Sentence
I FINALLY LOST MY VIRGINITY
Sike! I never lose.
Virginity is a lot like rational thinking.
If you happen to visit the church regularly, you'll probably lose it before you're 14.
I didn't lose my virginity
Because I never lose
Which creature loses it's virginity the earliest?
A chicken. It gets laid at birth.
My son said that if this post gets 1000 upvotes, he'll lose his virginity.
Please, don't, he's on a catholic church trip.
Satan challenges God to a basketball game, so God puts together a choice team from heaven and goes down to h**....
When they come back to heaven, it's with shocking news: they lost the game 52 to 140!
The v**... Mary is stunned, "How could you possibly lose the game with a team like yours?! Didn't you have the best saints, the most generous souls, the philanthropists and Jesus himself??"
"Yes," fumes God, "it turns out they're all terrible at receiving."