Losing Temper Jokes
13 losing temper jokes and hilarious losing temper puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about losing temper that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Losing Temper Short Jokes
Short losing temper jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The losing temper humour may include short losing voice jokes also.
- My wife told me I have a bad temper, so I flushed a GPS tracker down the toilet. That way I'd never lose my sh*t again.
- Did you hear about Bruce Banner losing his temper at the Avengers' pool party? He made a Hulk Splash
- Historically, the Inuit are one of the few groups of people who never lose their temper. After decades of research, scientists were able to figure out why... They're nomads.
- What does a short-tempered doctor say when hes going out of business? "I'm losing my patience!"
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Losing Temper One Liners
Which losing temper one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with losing temper? I can suggest the ones about losing interest and losing your head.
- Men are like steel They're useless when they lose their temper
- Why did the doctor lose his temper? because he ran out of patients.
Losing Temper Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about losing temper you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean losing jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make losing temper pranks.
Gun rights
Fix this joke:
A blonde was getting heated arguing with her brunette friend. Her friend was trying to stay calm as she explained the importance of gun rights for personal and property protection.
"That's all anyone talks about, gun rights, gun rights, gun rights. All I'm saying is that gun lefts matter too!" Says the blonde.
The brunette finally loses her temper and says, "Now what the h**... is a gun left!?!"
The blonde freezes for a moment before quietly saying, "I don't even know because no one ever talks about them and I've never thought to look them up."
A man goes to the doctor, worried about his wife's temper.
The doctor asks, What's the problem?
The man says, Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every day my wife seems to lose her temper for no reason. It scares me.
The doctor says, I have a cure for that. When it seems that your wife is getting angry, just take a glass of water and start swishing it in your mouth. Just swish and swish but don't s**... it until she either leaves the room or calms down.
Two weeks later, the man comes back to the doctor looking fresh and reborn.
The man says, Doctor, that was a brilliant idea! Every time my wife started losing it, I swished with water. I swished and swished, and she calmed right down! How does a glass of water do that?
The doctor says, The water itself does nothing. It's keeping your mouth shut that does the trick.
Temper cure...
A woman goes to the Doctor, worried about her husband 's temper.
The Doctor asks: "What's the problem?
The woman says: "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every day my husband seems to lose his temper for no reason. It scares me."
The Doctor says: "I have a cure for that. When it seems that your husband is getting angry, just take a glass of water and start swishing it in your mouth. Just swish and swish but don't s**... it until he either leaves the room or calms down.
Two weeks later the woman comes back to the doctor looking fresh and reborn.
The woman says: "Doctor that was a brilliant idea! Every time my husband started losing it, I swished with water. I swished and swished, and he
calmed right down! How does a glass of water do that?"
The Doctor says: "The water itself does nothing. It's keeping your mouth shut that does the trick".
Husband's Temper
A woman goes to the Doctor, worried about her husband's temper.
The Doctor asks: "What's the problem?
The woman says: "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every day my husband seems to lose his temper for no reason. It scares me."
The Doctor says: "I have a cure for that. When it seems that your husband is getting angry, just take a glass of water and start swishing it in your mouth. Just swish and swish but don't s**... it until he either leaves the room or calms down."
Two weeks later the woman comes back to the doctor looking fresh and reborn.
The woman says: "Doctor that was a brilliant idea! Every time my husband started losing it, I swished with water. I swished and swished, and he calmed right down! How does a glass of water do that?"
The Doctor says: "The water itself does nothing. It's keeping your mouth shut that does the trick..."
Nelson Mandela...
Nelson Mandela is sitting at home watching TV and drinking a beer when he hears a knock at the door. When he opens it, he is confronted by a Japanese man, clutching a clipboard and yelling, "You Sign! You sign!" Behind him is an enormous truck full of car exhausts.
Nelson is standing there in complete amazement, when the Japanese man starts to yell louder: "You sign! You sign!"
Nelson says to him, "Look, you've obviously got the wrong man", and shuts the door.
The next day he hears a knock at the door again. When he opens it, the Japanese is back with a huge truck of brake pads. He thrusts his clipboard under Nelson's nose, yelling, "You sign! You sign!"
Mr. Mandela is getting a bit hacked off by now, so he pushes the Japanese man back, shouting: "Look, go away! You've got the wrong man! I don't want them!" Then he slams the door in his face again.
The following day, Nelson is resting, and late in the afternoon, he hears a knock on the door again. On opening it, there is the same Japanese thrusting a clipboard under his nose, shouting, "You sign! You sign!"
Behind him are TWO very large trucks full of car parts. This time Nelson loses his temper completely, he picks up the man by his shirt and yells at him; "Look, I don't want these! Do you understand? You must have the wrong name! Who do you want to give these to?
The little Japanese man looks at him very puzzled, consults his clipboard and says...
"You not Nissan Main Dealer?"