The Best 14 Loot Jokes

Following is our collection of funniest Loot jokes. There are some loot satoru jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these loot crate puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Funny Loot Jokes and Puns

Three burglars break into a building and are confronted by a soldier, a cop, and a politician.

The politician tells the soldier to kill Burglar #1, and the two stab each other to death.

The politician then tells the cop to arrest Burglar #2, and the two beat each other unconscious.

The politician then walks up to Burglar #3 and says "I just saved your life, your freedom, and tripled your share of the loot. I think 20% is a fair cut."

Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day.

Give a man a loot box that MIGHT contain a fish and you'll get paid FOREVERRR!!

The queen asked the visiting Indian Prime Minister, "I hear Indian politicians are notoriously corupt and wealthy"

"Quite so," he said, "but none so brazen as to wear their loot on their head".

Loot joke, The queen asked the visiting Indian Prime Minister, "I hear Indian politicians are notoriously corup

What is the difference between a prostitute and EA?

Both have expensive loot boxes we have to pay for however it's prostitutes who end up with a bad taste in their mouths not their clients.

A burglar breaks in a house

As he is looking around he hears a voice "Jesus is watching you!" Panicked he looks around but sees nothing and nobody. He keeps searching for loot when again "Jesus is watching you!" This time he does a better search and finally sees a parrot in a cage. "Did you say that?" he asks "Yes, it was me." confirms the parrot. "What's your name?" we inquires. "Moses" answers the parrot. Burglar can't help but to laugh. "What kind of people name their parrot Moses?" "Same type of people that name their guard pit bull Jesus."


[NSFW] So our friend said her dance instructor warned the girls about a level 2 sex offender across the street from the studio

So I looked at her and asked what kind of loot he drops, and how much gold and XP he gives when killed.

Why did EA Games cross the road?

Please purchase a loot crate for a chance at credits to purchase the punchline

Loot joke, Why did EA Games cross the road?

What did the pirate say when he turned 81?

Nothing. He stood alone and sobbed uncontrollably, wishing that he could exchange all of his loot to get back the family and friends who all died long before him.

Unable to bear his sorrows for another lonely year, the old pirate kicked the stool out from underneath himself and smiled for the first time in years. He would see them again soon.

Where do internet pirates get their loot?

From pier to pier.

Why did the pirate store their loot in an arid area?

Because desert tends to make the booty larger.

Activision stated that there would be no loot boxes or weapons tied behind something you have to pay for in the newest CoD

Lol who is buying that.

You can explore loot pillage reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean loot plunder dad jokes. There are also loot puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


My Grandfather died in Normandy...

After his loot box landed on him...

What did the insensitive gamer ask when he learned that his best friend died?

He asked, "Did he drop any loot?"

What do you get when you mix a nymphomaniac with a kleptomaniac?

Someone who makes out with the loot.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the loot hoard jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working loot raffle piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes