Loo Jokes
29 loo jokes and hilarious loo puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about loo that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Laughter is the best medicine! Read this humorous article about the best and funniest loo jokes on the internet. From the uniquely British toilet-humour to the outrageously slapstick humour, these jokes are sure to brighten up your day and leave you with a smile on your face. Experience the best lav jokes today and find out why Brits have an unrivalled taste for loo-roll jokes!
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Funniest Loo Short Jokes
Short loo jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The loo humour may include short toilet jokes also.
- 62% of Kentuckians pronounce their state capital "Loo-uh-vul", while 38% say "Loo-ee-ville". Unfortunately, the correct answer is Frankfort.
- Is the capital of Kentucky pronounced Loo-iss-ville or Loo-ee-ville? Wrong. It's pronounced Frank-fort.
- New bathroom I was shopping for a new bathroom this week, and was shown an amazing toilet that plays abba songs when you flush it.
What a loo. - My girlfriend came up with this one and wanted me to share with you guys. What do you call heavens toilet? Halle-LOO-yah
- What did the peons at the jam factory say when asked if they needed to use the loo? "No time for loos, sir,
'Cause we are the jam peons!" - Why did the sailor get a promotion when he went to the restroom? Because he became a loo tenant.
- I hate it when my finger goes through the loo roll when I'm wiping It's by far the worst part of my job at the care home!
- I went to a Abba themed bar last night The toilet was like a maze
What a loo couldn't escape if I wanted to - What did the dance instructor say to her student when the student wanted to use her bathroom? Skip to my loo.
- Is the capital of Kentucky pronounced Loo-ee-ville or Lou-vul? Neither, it's pronounced Frankfort.
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Loo One Liners
Which loo one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with loo? I can suggest the ones about pronounce and restroom.
- I used to clean the toilets when I was in the army They called me loo tenant
- I just bought an ABBA toilet. What a loo!
- Never pour cereal down the loo. It Kellogg's up your toilet.
- Why do poets go to the zoo to use the restroom? So they can poo in the loo at the zoo.
- Where does Vin go after eating a really hot curry? Da loo.
- Why did the soldier salute the occupied restroom? There was a loo tenant inside.
- I found a satanic puzzle in the toilet today. It was a loo cipher
- What do you call an army official who rents toilets? A Loo-Tenant
- What rank are you in the bathroom? A loo-tenant
- Where does a French person go to the bathroom? The Loo-rve
- What is the colour of a ghost's toilet? Boo-loo.
- Roses are red, violets are blue. Someone send help,
There's a stranger on my loo. - What do you call a veteran who sleeps in a bathroom stall? A loo-tenant.
- What are the toilets in the ice hotel called? Ig-loos
- What do you call a soldier who lives in a toilet? A loo-tenant.
Loo Roll Jokes
Here is a list of funny loo roll jokes and even better loo roll puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I got in touch with my inner self today.... ...that's what I get for buying single ply loo roll.
Uproarious Loo Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time
What funny jokes about loo you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean capital jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make loo pranks.
The CEO of Ryanair, walks into a pub...
Michael O'Leary, the CEO of Ryanair, walks into a pub.
The he says to the bartender "Can I have a pint of beer?"
The bartender says "Certainly, that'll be €0.50"
He responds with "50 cents? That's wonderfully cheap!"
But then the bartender tells him "And it'll be €1 for the glass, €3 if you want to sit down, €7 if you stand up, €15 to use the loo... "
Little Johnny took a leak with his classmate in the school loo.
His classmate noticed that after peeing, Johnny didn't wash his hands. He then proceeded to ask:
"Johnny, why do you not wash your hands after peeing?"
"Is there a need to do so?"
"Yes! My mum taught me to wash after peeing, to wash off pee in my hands."
"Well, I think your mom is s**... for that matter."
"How come, Johnny?"
"My mum never taught me to pee on my hands!"
A man orders a drink..
**(Not sure if this has been posted here before. Had read it long before as a kid.)**
A man orders a drink but has to use the loo. To ensure nobody drinks his booze he places a note underneath the glass which reads "I spat in the drink".. He returns from the loo finding an another note for him.. "Me too!"