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Logs Jokes

46 logs jokes and hilarious logs puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about logs that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Logs Short Jokes

Short logs jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The logs humour may include short logging jokes also.

  1. A lumberjack once told me he's cut down 27,572 trees. How do ya know exactly how many? I inquired.
    Easy. I keep a log.
  2. If you thought eBay was bad, don't even try Tinder... Everytime I log in it says 'No Matches Available'
  3. As a lumberjack i know i have cut down 2,718 trees. Because every time I cut one down I keep a log.
  4. So y=e^e^x was hitting on y=e-1/x ... y=e^e^x said, "come with me baby, I'll show you the natural growth of my log". "Sorry", replied y=e-1/x, "but even I have my limits."
  5. I can't understand why my credit card keeps getting declined Every time I log into my account online it says I have an outstanding balance.
  6. As a lumberjack, I know that I've cut exactly 2,417 trees. I know because every time I cut one, I keep a log.
  7. A passer by asked a tree surgeon how many trees he has cut down... Surgeon: Exactly 178,794
    Passerby: Wow, how do you know that?
    Surgeon: I keep a log
  8. My father asked for the Wi-Fi password... It's taped under the modem, I told him.
    After three failed attempts to log on, he asked, Am I spelling this right? T-A-P-E-D-U-N-D-E-R-T-H-E-M-O-D-E-M?
  9. "Doctor, help me. I've been sleeping like a log." Doctor: "So how is that a problem?"
    Patient: "I keep waking up in the fireplace."
  10. I log in facebook to see that everyone is at the bar... I go to the bar to see that everyone is on facebook.

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Logs One Liners

Which logs one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with logs? I can suggest the ones about logged and lists.

  1. What do you call a dog with no legs? Log
  2. What did they find in the toilet in the star ship Enterprise? The captain's log.
  3. How do lumberjacks know how many trees they have cut down? They keep a log!
  4. Auto-correct walks into a bar... And the batman says, 'why the log fence?'
  5. How does a tree access the internet? It logs on.
  6. What's in the toilet of the Starship Enterprise? The Captain's log
  7. What did Euler find in his toilet? A natural log
  8. How do trees get on the Internet? They log in.
  9. What does a mathematicion find in a forest? A natural log.
  10. How does Yoda spend his time. He mostly just sits on his log, watching the Dagobah.
  11. How does a lumberjack know how many trees he cuts down in one day? He kept a log
  12. I logged on to Reddit today and was promised Fame, Fortune, and Women The cake was a lie.
  13. What do you call three logs in a bed? A Treesome
  14. What has no legs and sounds like a dog? A log
  15. What does Captain Kirk do on the toilet ? He makes a Captain's log

Logs joke, What does Captain Kirk do on the toilet ?

Experience Good Cheer with Hilarious Logs Jokes and Friends

What funny jokes about logs you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean logo jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make logs pranks.

An American, Frenchman, Israeli, Spaniard, and a German are on a video call. Their boss logs in and starts the meeting by askng "How's my connection, can everybody see me alright?" They answer:

"yes", "oui", "ken", "si", "ja"

Did you know that the 16th presidency had the best records kept?

I think they were called the Lincoln Logs.

Hacking is like gay s**......

you enter a b**... hoping there are no logs.

The b**... says "I didn't build that, Your Honor."

The judge points at the picture of the pile of logs in the river and says "we have damming evidence against you"
I'll see myself out

What do environmentally friendly mathematicians use to make a fire?

Natural Logs
Just though of this sitting in class, please don't hurt me

What do organic mathematicians throw into their fireplaces?

Natural logs.

Why do mathematicians like forests?

Because of all the natural logs

What do you call a chicken hauling logs?

Pull Tree

My sphincter is a lumberjack.

He cuts logs in half.

I have a spreadsheet of all the Abe Lincoln reposts.

I call them my Lincoln logs.

Why did the hippy teach the lumberjack calculus?

So he'd use natural logs!

I keep a spreadsheet of every time Abraham Lincoln is mentioned on Reddit.

I call it my Lincoln Logs

How does a lumberjack end his shift?

He logs out.

How does a tree get online?

It logs in

"How long have you been chopping wood for?"

"I'm not sure, I'll check the logs"

Marriage is like a fire.

If you put the logs too close together the fire grows too hot and burns out quickly. If you put the logs too far apart the fire goes cold. The trick is having the logs just the right distance apart.
And every once in a while you have to use your poker.

Why do magicians saw people in half instead of logs?

Because the show looks fishy if you use too many plants...

A lumberjack went to a doctor complaining of back pain and can't carry heavy logs.

He was told he didn't have enough lumber support.

Apparently Abraham Lincoln kept extremely detailed records of every single tree he cut down, detailing the type of tree, dimensions, even the location where it was cut, and more.

They're called the Lincoln Logs.

How does a cabin get on the internet?

It logs in.

I got my friend a house warming present

I got him a bag of logs for his wood burner

What Do Mathematicians Make In The Bathroom?

Natural logs.

What do you call a fluid log of fluid logs?

A diarrhea diary.

What does Imperator Furiosa like to click when she logs into a website?

REMEMBER ME!!!!!!!!!!

Ever since I failed Calculus I can't go into the woods

There's too many natural logs for my liking

How much wood have you chopped?

Not sure. Let me check the logs.

They should make a TV show about people who dance on logs,

They can call it Log-a-Rhythm.

Why did the high schooler ask the lumberjack for math help?

Because they work with logs.

Who doesn't like lincoln logs

john wilkes blocks

Logs joke, Who doesn't like lincoln logs

jokes about logs