Local Politics Jokes
4 local politics jokes and hilarious local politics puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about local politics that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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The Funniest Local Politics Jokes for a Bone-Shaking Laugh
What is a good local politics joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
President George W. Bush decides it is time to do some public relations at a local Washington DC nursing home.
The President begins his "tour" down the main hallway and passes by a little old man who doesn't seem to notice him.
Sensing this, President Bush backtracks to the resident and asks, "Do you know who I am?"
The little old man looks up from his walker and says, "No, but if you go to the front desk, they will tell you your name."
Political Joke
In Texas there is a town called New Braunfels, where there is a large German-speaking population.
One day, a local rancher driving down a country road noticed a man using his hand to drink water from the rancher's stock pond.
The rancher rolled down the window and shouted: "Sehr angenehm! Trink das Wasser nicht. Die kuehe haben darein geschissen."
This means: Glad to meet you! Don't drink the water. The cows have sh*t in it."
The man shouted back: "I'm from New York and just down here campaigning for Joe Biden. I can't understand you. Please speak in English."
The rancher replied: "Use both hands."
A man and his wife went on a vacation to Israel,
and while walking to their hotel after a long day, the wife got hit by a car. Dead on the spot. The local churches' priest offers to bury her in the churches' cemetery rather than taking her body back on the plane and burying her at home. The man however, politely declines and says, "I'd rather bury her at home. "
The priest, surprised, said: "You'd save lots of money if you buried her here."
The man replies: "about 2000 years ago, a man was buried here and after 3 days stood up again. I cannot take the risk of that happening here."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
she wants a box of condoms
Two old ladies were outside their nursing home, having a smoke when it started to rain. One of the ladies pulled out a c**..., cut off the end, put it over her cigarette and continued smoking.
Lady 1: "What's that?"
Lady 2: "A c**.... This way my cigarette doesn't get wet."
Lady 1: "Where did you get it?"
Lady 2: "You can get them at any drugstore."
The next day ... Lady 1 hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms. The guy looks at her kind of strangely (she is, after all, over 80 years of age), but politely asks what brand she prefers.
Lady 1: "It doesn't matter as long as it fits a Camel."
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