Lobby Jokes
56 lobby jokes and hilarious lobby puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about lobby that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Lobby jokes have become increasingly popular, especially in the workplace. From the hallway to the cafeteria, it's becoming increasingly common to hear people poking fun at those at the hobby lobby or other places of employment. Check out the funniest of these jokes to make your day a little brighter!
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Funniest Lobby Short Jokes
Short lobby jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The lobby humour may include short league jokes also.
- I returned to my hotel after an evening of drinking, so I went to the front desk. Excuse me, I don't remember what room I'm in. I said. No problem, said the receptionist. You're in the lobby.
- A man is staying in a hotel. He walks up to the front desk and says, Sorry ma'am, I forgot what room I'm in, can you help me?
The receptionist replies, No problem, sir. This is the lobby. - Hotel Indian. Did you hear about the Indian who had to sleep in the hotel lobby because he didn't have a reservation?
- I met some chess players in the hotel lobby bragging about how good they were It was chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.
- Astronauts preparing for STS-134 lobbied NASA to include fresh apples on board the final flight of the shuttle, but were ultimately unsuccessful. Needless to say, it was a fruitless Endeavour
- I finally found a machine at the gym that lets older guys date younger women who come to work out! They just installed an ATM in the lobby.
- The lobby of my local Dairy Queen was closed due to short staff. They should've hired taller employees
(Joke brought to you by my 9yo sister) - What did the Pope say to the heretic who successfully lobbied to be buried on hallowed ground? "What we have here is a failure to excommunicate!"
- Don MacLean lobbied for GM to be included in a carmaker tax He wanted to bring Chevy to the levy
- Middle school dance parties probably look like a fortnite lobby now. Lots of ridiculous dancing and and unnecessary shooting.
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Lobby One Liners
Which lobby one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with lobby? I can suggest the ones about campaign and locker.
- Why did the Native American sleep in the hotel lobby? He didn't have a reservation.
- I want all buildings to have a reception area. I think I'll lobby for it.
- What's a politicians favorite hang out spot? The Lobby.
- Where did Abdelhamid Abaaoud do most of his craft shopping? Wahabi Lobby.
- Did you hear about the woman who robbed a Hobby Lobby store? She pleaded quilty.
- What kind of fish does Google have in their lobby? [betta]s
- I went to a s**... bank to make a donation. This guy in the lobby came with me.
Waiting Lobby Jokes
Here is a list of funny waiting lobby jokes and even better waiting lobby puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I was waiting at the hotel's lobby when the WiFi was disconnecting from time to time. I really hated that reception.
- I saw an Asian man sitting in the lobby of a doctor's office... He was waiting. Patient Lee, to be exact.
- My dental hygienist is cute.
Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby.
Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon's appointments.
Hobby Lobby Jokes
Here is a list of funny hobby lobby jokes and even better hobby lobby puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do you call a person who spends his/her free time trying to get legislators to support craft stores? A Hobby Lobby hobbyist lobbyist.
Experience Instant Grins & Giggles with Playful Lobby Jokes
What funny jokes about lobby you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean club jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make lobby pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Donald & Daisy
Donald Duck and Daisy Duck were spending the night together in a hotel room and Donald wanted to have s**... with Daisy.
The first thing Daisy asked was, "Do you have a c**...?"
Donald frowned and said, "No."
Daisy told Donald that if he didn't get a c**..., they could not have s**....
"Maybe they sell them at the front desk," she suggested.
So Donald went down to the lobby and asked the hotel clerk if they had condoms.
"Yes, we do," the clerk said and pulled a box out from under the counter and gave it to Donald.
The clerk asked, "Would you like me to put them on your bill?"
"Thit No!" Donald quacked, "I'd thuffocate!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My old man (a doctor)'s Favorite.
A man waits patiently in the lobby of the ICU to see his wife, who has been in a coma for over a month, when a nurse runs out and says that he is needed right away.
Standing outside the room, the nurse tells the husband, "This morning we were giving your wife a sponge bath and we noticed something amazing!"
"What is it?!? the husband asked
The nurse explained, "Well, while we were giving her the sponge bath, we noticed that when we would touch her...uh....v**...... her vitals would spike on the monitor!"
Confused, the husband asked, "Well what do you need me for?"
The nurse responded, "Well we need you to go in there and perform o**... s**... on her, to see if that won't wake her up."
The man immediately agreed and closed the curtains as he entered the room.
5 minutes later the alarms sounded as the woman flat lined.
"Shes dead!" proclaimed the nurse, "What did you do?"
The man replied, "... I think I choked her..."
A Lithuanian couple in a hotel
A Lithuanian couple go to a hotel in USA. They spot a mouse in the room.
"A mouse! Dear, call the lobby, you know at least some English, right?!"
The man picks up the phone.
"Helou."
"Can I help you?"
"Yes, dū jū nau Tom and Džeri?"
"Yes sir, of course."
"So, Džeri iz hier."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Donald Duck and Daisy Duck were spending the night together in a Hotel room...
...and Donald wanted to have s**... with Daisy.
The first thing Daisy asked was, 'Do you have a c**...?'
Donald frowned and said, 'No.'
Daisy told Donald that if he didn't get a c**..., they could not have s**....
'Maybe they sell them at the front desk,' she suggested.
So Donald went down to the lobby and asked the hotel clerk if they had condoms.
'Yes, we do,' the clerk said and pulled a box out from under the counter and gave it to Donald.
The clerk asked, 'Would you like me to put them on your bill?
'Thit No!' Donald quacked, I'll thuffocate
Bob and Joe, old friends who haven't seen each other in years, meet in the street
"Joe!" says Bob. "Bob!" says Joe, "How are ya? It's been years!".
"It sure has!" said Bob, "But listen, I'm in a rush right now. Why don't you come to my place tomorrow and we'll catch up?"
"Sure!" says Joe.
"Ok. I live at Apartment 12, 110 Lexington. Come to the lobby door and press the buzzer with your right elbow. Push the door open with your left foot when I buzz you in. Go to the elevator and use your nose to press the call button. Apartment 12 is on the third floor, so use your left elbow to press the button, then come along to my apartment and give the door a tap with your right foot and I'll let you in."
"Ok Bob. But why all the elbows and feet and noses?" says Joe, perplexed.
Bob says "What, you're coming empty handed?!"
Islamic Star Trek?
The Iranian Ambassador to the UN had just finished giving a speech, and walked out into the lobby of the convention center where he was introduced to a United States Marine Corps General.
As they talked, the Iranian said, "I have just one question about what I have seen in
America ."
The General said, "Well, is there anything I can do to help?"
The Iranian whispered, "My son watches this show called 'Star Trek' and in it there
is Kirk who is Canadian, Chekhov who is Russian, Scotty who is Scottish, Uhura who is black, and Sulu who is Japanese, but there are NO Muslims. My son is very upset and doesn't understand why there aren't any Iranians, Iraqis, Afghans, Egyptians, Palestinians, Saudis, Syrians, or Pakistanis on 'Star Trek'.
"The General leaned toward the Iranian Ambassador, and whispered in his ear, "That's because it takes place in the future..."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Woman in a coma
Two nurses are giving a woman in a coma a sponge bath. They notice that when they get near her private areas that she starts to get a little stimulated. The theorize that o**... s**... will bring her out the coma. They go out into the lobby and tell her husband their theory. The husband is a little aprehensive about it at first, but he agrees to do it. The nurses leave the man with his wife and give him some privacy. They come back about 10 minutes later and the woman is dead! "What happened?" asks one of the nurses. The man replies, "I dont know...I think she choked."
observation at the doctors office.
the person the doctor is looking at is called the patient... but the ones wating in the lobby are being patient.
A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel.
They were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories when the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse.
''But why?'' they asked, as they moved off.
''Because,'' he said ''I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.''
Today is my first day at the gym.
I walk in and see a bunch of hot women working out. I walk up to the guy who is running the gym and ask him, " Sir, what machine should I use to impress the ladies over there?" He smiles at me and says, " Try the ATM Machine in the lobby."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a bunch of Christmas nuts bragging about their s**... lives in a hotel lobby?
Chestnuts boasting in an open foyer.
Where do ultra conservative Muslims go to buy trinkets, crafts, and home goods?
Wahhabi Lobby
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Saudi Arabian investment group just purchased Hobby Lobby...
It will now be called Wahabi Lobby
A liquor salesman, a food salesman and a mattress salesman were sitting in hotel lobby chatting
The liquor salesman spoke first,"Y'know, I hate to see a woman drink alone."
The food salesman countered with,"I hate to see a woman eat alone."
The mattress salesman said,"Say, what do you fellows think of the cold weather we've been having?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A bunch of chess players are in a hotel lobby discussing their recent victories.
The manager comes up to them and says, Sorry gentlemen, I'm going to have to ask you all to leave immediately!
Leave? Why? They asked.
The manager responded If there's one thing I can't stand, it's chess nuts boasting in an open foyer
3 pregnant women in a lobby
Three pregnant women in a lobby are knitting. The first one stops and takes a pill. "It's iron" she says "I want my baby to have strong muscles"
They continue knitting except for woman number 3 who is looking confusedly at her knitting.
The second woman stops to take a pill. "It's calcium. I want my baby to have strong bones."
They continue knitting except for the third woman who starts taking fistfuls of pills. The first two women stop and wait for her explanation.
"Oh it's just thalidomide...I don't know how to knit sleeves"
My friend who suffers from bipolar disorder called from the lobby.
He said, "Hey, I'm feeling great today. You want to go do something?"
I said, "Sure! I'll be down in a minute."
He said, "Well, that makes two of us."
An obese man wants to lose a few pounds, goes to see a specialist...
An Obese man wants to lose a few pounds, goes to see a specialist...
He's in the lobby for an hour before the doc calls him in.
Doc: I apologize for your wait.
Man: Don't, *I'm* the one that can't stop eating.
Sunday, March 4, 2017:
World Chess Championship. The hotel hosts a gala event with food and drink in the hotel lobby. The semi finalists are mingling. The final two are bragging about their respective stratagems for the final match. The desk clerk asks them to hang around. Because we all love to hear.... Two Chess nuts, boasting in an open foyer.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
They found a guy in hobby lobby dipping his t**... in the glitter bins
One eye witness was quoted as saying "It was pretty nuts!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Saudi Ambassador to the UN has just finished giving a speech, and walks out into the lobby where he meets President Trump..
They shake hands and as they walk the Saudi ambassador says, "You know, I have just one question about what I have seen here in America."
President Trump says, "Well your excellency, anything I can do to help you?"
The Saudi whispers "My son watches your show *Star Trek* and in it there are Russians, and b**..., and Asians, but never any Arabs. He is very upset. He doesn't understand why there are never any Arabs in Star Trek."
President Trump smiles and leans toward the Saudi, and whispers back: "Well, Star Trek takes place in the future."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A group of chess enthusiasts had checked into a hotel, and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories
After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse.
'But why?' they asked, as they moved off.
Because, he said, I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer
Watching Queen's Gambit really put me in the holiday spirit. Especially the scene where the player are in the hotel lobby bragging about the matches they won
I love chess nuts boasting in an open foyer
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their tournament victories
After an hour, the manager came out and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked. "Because," he said, "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I got arrested for i**... fishing, even though there weren't any 'no fishing' signs.
Apparently if it's an aquarium in a hotel lobby, you don't need a sign.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An Englishman, a Frenchman and an ethiopian all sit in the hospital lobby as their wives are giving birth.
After a while the doctor comes out, invites them into the nursery where 3 babies lie in cribs and says: "Congratulation! You all just became fathers! But there is one problem. Due to a nurse's error the babies got mixed up and we don't really know which one who's."
The Englishman suddenly grabs the darkest baby and sprints towards the door.
The doctor shouts: "Sir! What are you doing!!!?"
The Englishman as he's getting farther: "I'm not raising no b**... Frenchman!"
Mexican Custodian
A Mexican custodian finishes mopping the lobby floor. A young girl enters the lobby with her eyes glued to her smartphone.
"Miss," the Mexican custodian says, "the floor is wet."
The girl looks up from her phone with a bored expression. "K," she replies.
"Miss," the Mexican custodian repeats, "I said the floor is wet."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two chess player were in an open lobby, bragging to each other about their recent victories.
The manager comes over and says, "Could you both go to your rooms now?"
They ask, "Why?"
The manager replies, "Because I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
You're on vacation, and you've arrived at your hotel. The elevators in the lobby are numbered, from left to right, 1, 2, 3, 5, and 4.
Curious, you try to enter elevator 5, but are stopped by the bell boy.
"You can't use that elevator," he says.
"Why not?"
"It's out of order"
