The Best 49 Lisa Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Lisa jokes. There are some lisa suzy jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these lisa jenn puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Lisa Jokes and Puns
Doctor, doctor, I think my hearing's going!
What are the symptoms?
Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa and Maggie
That Mona Lisa...
She's no oil painting, is she?
Pornstar Lisa Ann has retired...
I wonder if she read her contract and realised she was getting screwed...
Why can't Ross & Phoebe ever drown?
Because David Schwimmer and Lisa Kudrow.
Why lisa fell out of the swing?
Where did little Lisa go after she got hit by a truck?
Everywhere.
Where did Lisa go during the bombardment..
Everywhere
Someone accused the Mona Lisa of killing a man.
But I think she's been framed
LISA GOPMAN: EATING DISORDER
For as long as I can remember, I've had an eating disorder: reverse anorexia. It's when I look in the mirror and think I'm really skinny.
My wife pulled this one on me the other day
My wife: you know Mona Lisa
Me: yeah?
My Wife: well before she met me she was just Lisa
What did the roadman say when he saw the Mona Lisa?
That's a peng ting.
You can explore lisa bobby reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean lisa jenni dad jokes. There are also lisa puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Whats the sickest piece of art?
Pneumonia Lisa
The Mona Lisa was arrested for loitering today
But it wasn't her fault, she was framed.
I just got fired for looking up clown videos on my lunch break.
My boss didn't buy that "Lisa Ann gets creampied" is a clown video
What's Hillary Clinton's favorite work of art?
Pneumonia Lisa
I can't stop starting at the Mona Lisa...
I think I'm in Louvre.
How did the cast of Friends cross the river safely?
Coz Lisa Kudrow
My ex is like the Mona Lisa
It's not that she is pretty or anything, but I would be ecstatic if I came home to find her hanging in the living room
Guys, if anyone is interested, a friend of mine got an invitation to the 2017 Berlin Marathon for Christmas. But it's the same day of his wedding. So if anyone wants (and is able) to go, everything is paid.
St. Mary's church @ 6pm. Bride's name is Lisa.
Just go there, get married and you're done.
Lisa: Mom don't do the dishes! It's your birthday!
Mom: That's so sweet of you to say Lisa!
Lisa: You can do them tomorrow
How were the cast of Friends able to escape a desert island on a homemade raft?
Because Lisa Kudrow.
Twelve-year-old Timmy was talking with his classmate, Lisa...
Timmy: "Hey Lisa, I'll give you a dollar if we can go in the closet and you let me stick my finger in your belly button."
Lisa: "Okay."
They go into the dark closet.
Lisa: "Hey Timmy! That's not my belly button!"
Timmy: "That's okay. That's not my finger."
I came across an interesting piece at The Louvre today...
Mona Lisa didn't look very impressed while I was wiping it all off.
What did Tommy Wiseau say when he tried pegging for the first time?
"You're tearing me apart Lisa!"
A priest was talking to a group of kids about "being good" and going to heaven.
At the end of his talk, he asked, "Where do you want to go?"
"Heaven! Heaven!" Yelled Little Lisa.
"And what do you have to be to get there?" asked the priest.
"Dead!" Yelled Little Johnny.
What is a Zombies favorite painting?
Moana Lisa
I like my women to be like the Mona Lisa...
Her dad's not in the picture.
Oprah said she might run for president, and it started a conversation about who would run against Trump. But we already know who becomes president after Trump ...
Lisa Simpson
My cousin has 2 tickets for the super bowl and paid $2500 for each ticket.
he didnt realize last year it was going to be the day of his wedding.
If interested he is looking for someone to take his place.
Her name is Lisa Phillips 35, about 140lbs, a good cook, She'll be in white
I went boating with cast of friends the other day...
None of them could use an oar, but Lisa Kudrow.
Sorry.
Why is Mona Lisa smiling?
She is in Louvre
What's Michael Jackson's favorite painting?
The Sha-Mona Lisa.
Mona Lisa was sentenced to life imprisonment.
She assured me she was framed.
Why did the Mona Lisa commit murder?
She never did, she was just framed!
Why did Lisa drop her ice cream?
she got hit by a car
"Bevky I feel like you're treating one of your kids worse than the others"
"What ? Which one do you mean ? Tommy, Lisa or the fat one ?"
So apparently a reporter made the Mona Lisa laugh.
I read it in an art-tickle.
What's the difference between Jesus and the Mona Lisa?
Takes **ONE** nail to hang the Mona Lisa.
Parents: Never call people names, okay?
Johnny: Got it
[later as an adult]
Her: Hi I'm Lisa
Johnny: Nice to meet you, human
A hot woman walks into a bar
She is immediatly approached by a man
"Hi i'm randy" the man says
"my name is Lisa" the woman responds
"My name is John" says the man
The son wanna date a neighbour
\- Dad, can I date Lisa next door?
\- No, she is your sister.
\- How about Anna in block 59?
\- No, she is your little sister.
\- Ok, this is weird. How about Karen the waitress? Can I date her or is she my sister too?
\- No, she is your brother.
The upset son goes tell his mother about what his dad said.
The mother gentlely comforts him:
\- You can date whoever you want, teddy bear. You are not his son.
Of course trump will challenge the results. He will not take no for an answer.
Just ask Ivana trump, Jill hearth, Jean carrol, summer zervos, alva Johnson, Jessica leeds, Kristen Anderson, Lisa boyne, Cathy heller, temple McDowell, Amy dorris, Karena Virginia, karen Johnson, mindy mcgillivary, Jennifer Murphy, Rachael crooks, Natasha stoynoff, juillet huddy, Jessica drake, ninni laaksonen, Cassandra searless, Mariah billado, Victoria Hughes, Bridget Sullivan, Tasha Dixon, and Samantha holvey.
What did Tommy Wiseau say to his wife when she was making pulled pork?
You're tearing meat apart Lisa!
The Teacher instructed her class to create a sentence with the words; defense, defeat and detail.
Little Lisa, who was normally a very quiet and reclusive child immediately jumped and waved her hand excitedly. Thinking a breakthrough was imminent, she picked Lisa first. Lisa recited; The cat jumped over defense. Defeat went first, detail went last.
What happened when the cast of 'Friends' were stuck out at sea in a life raft?
They were fine, because Lisa Kudrow
A friend of mine is convinced that Van Gogh painted the Mona Lisa.
I just don't have the 'art to correct him.
Did you hear about who went to DMX's funeral?
There was Brenda, LaTisha (uh), Linda, Felicia (okay)
Dawn, LeShaun, Ines, and Alicia (ooh)
Theresa, Monica, Sharron, Nicki (uh-huh)
Lisa, Veronica, Karen, Vicky (damn)
Cookie, well I met her in a ice cream parlor (aight?)
Tonya, Dianne, Lori and Carla (okay)
Marina (uh) Selena (uh) Katrina (uh) Sabrina (uh)
About three Kim's (what?) Latoya, and Tina (woo)
Shelley, Bridget, Cathy, Rasheeda (uh-huh)
Kelly, Nicole, Angel, Juanita (damn)
Stacy, Tracy, Rohna, and Ronda (what?)
Donna, Yolanda (what?) Tawana, and Wanda (what?)
Why did Pheobe beat Ross in the annual Friends nautical race?
David's a good Schwimmer but Lisa Kudrow.
The cast of Friends got shipwrecked on an deserted island...
Monica, Joey and Chandler were left behind because in real life David is a Schwimmer and Lisa Kudrow.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the lisa mom jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working lisa grace piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.