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Linda Jokes

27 linda jokes and hilarious linda puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about linda that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Check out this collection of funny jokes and puns featuring Linda! With jokes about everyone from Rio Linda to Linda Belcher and even Suzy and Stacey, you and your friends will be sure to laugh.

Funniest Linda Short Jokes

Short linda jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The linda humour may include short darling jokes also.

  1. The Exorcist star Linda Blair turns 62 today and still looks amazing She is still turning heads.
    (Heard this one on the radio this morning.)
  2. A couple getting married are standing at the altar saying their vows... "Do you, Linda, take David the optometrist for better or worse. Better.... Or worse? Better.... Or worse?"
  3. Cyclops: How do you spell Hawaii? Wife: Well, you need 2 i's.
    Cyclops: [puts pen down] My life is just a joke to you, isn't it Linda?
  4. Cyclops is searching for vacation places. Cyclops: how do you spell Hawaii?
    Wife: well, you need 2 i's
    Cyclops: my life is just a joke to you isn't it Linda?
  5. I was sitting in a bar... When a guy yells out, "Linda why didn't you give your mom any grandkids?" She yelled back, "Because I swallowed them all!"
  6. My wife kept telling me, "You could use some real friends, Tom. People you could count on." "I didn't ask for your advice, Linda!" I shouted.
    It got so annoying I had to unimagine her.
  7. This is odd. People started naming their food in the office fridge. Today I ate a sandwich named Linda..
  8. Couple at next table: "The thing is, Linda; some people just take things personally and completely overreact." Me: (flips table)
  9. My gf cheated on me.. she slept with Jim. Heard this from his gf Linda while we were in bed
  10. Why did Linda Bove's dog commit s**...? You would too if your name was "Auahvuahguahvuahgua"

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Linda One Liners

Which linda one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with linda? I can suggest the ones about matt and john.

  1. What do vegetarian maggots eat? Linda Mccartney...
  2. Did you hear about Linda Lovelace's grandmother? She went down on the Titanic.
  3. What do you call a pig with wings? Linda McCartney. (Yes, I know she's dead)
  4. Why was Linda so mad on her wedding day? Her soon to be husband forgot how to groom.
  5. What do Linda McCarthy and a spider web the in common? They hang out with dead Beatles.
  6. What do you call a cow with wings? Linda McCartney.
  7. What do vegetarian worms eat?? Linda Mcartney
  8. How did Paul McCartney get Linda pregnant? C Moon
  9. Linda is a decent housekeeper. But, her vacuuming kinda s**...!
  10. What does a r**... say for foreplay? "Brace yourself, Linda-Lou"

Linda joke, What does a r**... say for foreplay?

Hilarious Fun Linda Jokes to Bring Joy & Laughter with Friends

What funny jokes about linda you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean bob jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make linda pranks.

A cyclops and his wife looking for their prefect holiday destination

Cyclobs: How do you spell Hawaii?
Wife: Well... You need two i's...
Cyclobs (putting the pen down): My life is just a joke to you isn't it, Linda?

A robber enters an old couple's home in the middle of the night...

As he is grabbing things, the couple wake up and confront him. The robber has a gun and says he would have left quietly but now he is gonna have to kill them.
"But before I do that," says the robber, "I want to know your names. What's your name, woman?"
"Linda," the wife replies meekly.
"Well, that's my mother's name. I can't kill you." Then he turns to the husband and says, "And what's your name?"
"Frank, but everybody in town calls me Linda."

The vaccine conspiracy

Linda had a heart attack and was brought to the emergency room while in clinical death. The doctors managed to revive her, but during her coma she saw a bright light and God appeared to her. She asked him:
"Tell me, God, is it true that vaccines could cause autism?"
"No, autism is a condition that develops during pregnancy"
After getting well, she met her friends and told them about her experience:
"Girls, I have awful news: the conspiracy goes way higher than we've thought"

Private investigator

(At a fancy diner with wife and her friend)
Wife's friend: So, what do you do for a living?
Me: I'm a private investigator
Wife: Kieth, you're allowed to say gynecologist
Me: People are eating, Linda!

Did you hear about who went to DMX's f**...?

There was Brenda, LaTisha (uh), Linda, Felicia (okay)
Dawn, LeShaun, Ines, and Alicia (ooh)
Theresa, Monica, Sharron, Nicki (uh-huh)
Lisa, Veronica, Karen, Vicky (d**...)
Cookie, well I met her in a ice cream parlor (aight?)
Tonya, Dianne, Lori and Carla (okay)
Marina (uh) Selena (uh) Katrina (uh) Sabrina (uh)
About three Kim's (what?) Latoya, and Tina (woo)
Shelley, Bridget, Cathy, Rasheeda (uh-huh)
Kelly, Nicole, Angel, Juanita (d**...)
Stacy, Tracy, Rohna, and Ronda (what?)
Donna, Yolanda (what?) Tawana, and Wanda (what?)

A boy has an amazing night with a girl from her school.

When he gets to school the next morning, he decides to tell his friends about his night.
"Guys, I had an amazing night with Linda!"
Linda overhears the conversation and responds.
"In your dreams!"
"Yup."

Linda joke, What do you call a pig with wings?