The Best 19 Linda Jokes

Following is our collection of Linda jokes which are very funny. There are some linda patricia jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these linda darling puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Funny Linda Jokes and Puns

A cyclops and his wife looking for their prefect holiday destination

Cyclobs: How do you spell Hawaii?

Wife: Well... You need two i's...

Cyclobs (putting the pen down): My life is just a joke to you isn't it, Linda?

A robber enters an old couple's home in the middle of the night...

As he is grabbing things, the couple wake up and confront him. The robber has a gun and says he would have left quietly but now he is gonna have to kill them.

"But before I do that," says the robber, "I want to know your names. What's your name, woman?"

"Linda," the wife replies meekly.

"Well, that's my mother's name. I can't kill you." Then he turns to the husband and says, "And what's your name?"

"Frank, but everybody in town calls me Linda."

The vaccine conspiracy

Linda had a heart attack and was brought to the emergency room while in clinical death. The doctors managed to revive her, but during her coma she saw a bright light and God appeared to her. She asked him:

"Tell me, God, is it true that vaccines could cause autism?"

"No, autism is a condition that develops during pregnancy"

After getting well, she met her friends and told them about her experience:

"Girls, I have awful news: the conspiracy goes way higher than we've thought"

Linda joke, The vaccine conspiracy

The Exorcist star Linda Blair turns 62 today and still looks amazing

She is still turning heads.

(Heard this one on the radio this morning.)

A couple getting married are standing at the altar saying their vows...

"Do you, Linda, take David the optometrist for better or worse. Better.... Or worse? Better.... Or worse?"


Cyclops: How do you spell Hawaii?

Wife: Well, you need 2 i's.

Cyclops: [puts pen down] My life is just a joke to you, isn't it Linda?

Private investigator

(At a fancy diner with wife and her friend)
Wife's friend: So, what do you do for a living?
Me: I'm a private investigator
Wife: Kieth, you're allowed to say gynecologist
Me: People are eating, Linda!

Linda joke, Private investigator

Cyclops is searching for vacation places.

Cyclops: how do you spell Hawaii?

Wife: well, you need 2 i's

Cyclops: my life is just a joke to you isn't it Linda?

I was sitting in a bar...

When a guy yells out, "Linda why didn't you give your mom any grandkids?" She yelled back, "Because I swallowed them all!"

My wife kept telling me, "You could use some real friends, Tom. People you could count on."

"I didn't ask for your advice, Linda!" I shouted.

It got so annoying I had to unimagine her.

A boy has an amazing night with a girl from her school.

When he gets to school the next morning, he decides to tell his friends about his night.

"Guys, I had an amazing night with Linda!"
Linda overhears the conversation and responds.

"In your dreams!"

"Yup."

You can explore linda suzy reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean linda myrtle dad jokes. There are also linda puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


What do vegetarian maggots eat?

Linda Mccartney...

This is odd. People started naming their food in the office fridge.

Today I ate a sandwich named Linda..

Couple at next table: "The thing is, Linda; some people just take things personally and completely overreact."

Me: (flips table)

Did you hear about Linda Lovelace's grandmother?

She went down on the Titanic.

What do you call a pig with wings?

Linda McCartney. (Yes, I know she's dead)

Linda joke, What do you call a pig with wings?

Why was Linda so mad on her wedding day?

Her soon to be husband forgot how to groom.

What do Linda McCarthy and a spider web the in common?

They hang out with dead Beatles.

What do you call a cow with wings?

Linda McCartney.


Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the linda susie jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working linda judy piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes