Limb Jokes

Funniest Limb Short Jokes

Short limb jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The limb humour may include short limps jokes also.

1. You are what you think you are Her: What do you do?
   Me: Global prosthetics distribution.
   Her: So you're an artificial limb salesman?
   Me: I prefer 'international arms dealer'.
2. A guy walked into a prosthetic limbs store. He picked up a false shoulder, arm and wrist.
   The store attendant asked "Would you like a hand with that?"
3. I'm a scientist who's researching b**... between humans and dogs… If you'd like more details, I'll be in my lab…
4. My dad always told me to treat women like flowers. So I tore my girlfriend apart limb by limb to find out whether or not she loved me.
5. If I ever find the guy who messed up my limb transplants, I'm going to kill him with my bear hands.
6. I went to the prosthetic limb store to buy some new hands "Two of each hand please." I say to the man at the counter.
   "We're all out of left hands sir." He responds.
   "All right then."
7. Why did the knight stop fighting after all his limbs had been chopped of? He'd been unarmed and defeated
8. As an amputee, I asked the doctor how much prosthetic limbs would cost. He said an arm and a leg.
9. If an octopus is called an octopus because of its eight limbs, what would you call an octopus with only seven limbs? An amputee.
10. Scientists thought they had found a limb of an ancient hominid... but it was just a fossil arm.

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Limb One Liners

Which limb one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with limb? I can suggest the ones about amputation and legged.

1. I have 3 eyes, 6 heads and 15 limbs, what am I? A liar.
2. What do you call a kid with an eyepatch and no limbs? Names.
3. Why are prosthetic limbs so in fashion? Anyone can pull them off
4. It's not a privilege for bears to have limbs. They have the right to bear arms.
5. What do you call the deaf man with no limbs? Whatever you want.
6. I'm gonna go out on a limb and say... "Look how high up in this tree I am".
7. Why did the Chinese government confiscate all deer legs? Mistook them for moose limbs.
8. The B in limb is silent Just like the p in bathwater
9. There's a guy selling prosthetic limbs on my street. He's an arms dealer.
10. Why did the limb doctor get arrested? Possession of arms
11. Tree house builders get no respect... I mean they go out on a limb to build these things!
12. What do you call a lap dance from a girl with 3 or less limbs? Amputease
13. What do you call a limb that has been transplanted? A hand-me-down.
14. How to lose a limb in star wars? Be a Jedi and a Skywalker.
15. What do you call a gang of people paralyzed in all four limbs? Squadriplegic.

No Limb Jokes

Here is a list of funny no limb jokes and even better no limb puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I got thrown out of the amputee club for having all of my limbs In my opinion that was an unfair dismemberment
• What do you call... What do you call a dwarf who sells prosthetic limbs?
  A small arms dealer.
• Scientists have now made cybernetic limbs available to the public! Unfortunately, they'll cost you an arm and a leg.
• Yesterday this guy walks up on my lawn and gives me the finger. I swear that's the last time I try to cut my tree limbs without gloves.
• In the future, if technology makes it possible to replace human limbs And its common enough that you can buy them in stores, will midgets go to small arms dealers?
• The other day I was climbing a tree with a friend He was talking about life and I had some advice so I said alright I'm going out on a limb here...
• My youngest said he was going to go out on a limb, and I asked him if it would be an arm or a leg.
• Did you hear about the new store where you can plug in robotic limbs? It's great even though they charge an arm and a leg.
• So what do you do? *I sell prosthetic limbs to various countries.*
  So you're like a med rep, but for amputees?
  *I prefer international arms dealer.*
• Did you hear about how much those new prosthetic limbs cost? An arm and a leg.

Lost Limb Jokes

Here is a list of funny lost limb jokes and even better lost limb puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• If Anakin lost a limb in II and Luke lost a limb in V, then in VIII Rey WILL NOT lose a limb, because she already lost a Han.
• If I write with the wrong hand that I've lost a limb to Lefty Loathin' Larry... Then the right hand is my left hand, and my right hand is what's left!
• My dog got hit by a car And lost 3 of his legs. He's looking really rough, I think he's on his last limb.
• What do you call four gentlemen who have completely lost the use of their limbs? Quadruplegic.
• Did you hear about the man who was born without a limb? He lost it back in mom.

Missing Limb Jokes

Here is a list of funny missing limb jokes and even better missing limb puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I'm starting a clothing company for people missing limbs. The name you ask? AmpuTEES
• I hate how people treat amputees differently. Just because they're missing a limb or two doesn't make them any less of a person.
• What's missing from star wars 7? Nobody's limbs.
• I had a camping trip planned, but this storm dropped big limbs all over my property I guess you could say I missed the forest for the trees.
• Chuck Norris stem cells can reproduce missing limbs.

Hilarious Limb Jokes that Bring Laughter with Friends

What funny jokes about limb you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean body part jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make limb pranks.