Lily Jokes
43 lily jokes and hilarious lily puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about lily that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Enjoy a collection of hilarious jokes about lilies, including references to water lilies, peace lilies, bud and lily, lily pads, lily flowers, Lily Tomlin, and even Cinderblock and Rose! Have fun reading these lighthearted jokes perfect for gardeners and nature lovers of all ages.
Quick Jump To
Funniest Lily Short Jokes
Short lily jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The lily humour may include short daisy jokes also.
- Why couldn't Snape be a Herbology teacher? Because he wasn't able to keep the Lilies alive.
- Why was Snape so upset when Lily Potter was wrongfully terminated? She was never able to receive her Severus package.
- A frog is sitting on a lily pad in the middle of what is clearly a river. He shouts to a toad on the shore, "Hey, look at me, I'm on a lake!" The toad yells back, "Naw man, you're in de-nile"
- I remember my parent's reaction when I brought home my first A+ on a test It was something like Who's Lily and You aren't even in AP Biology
Share These Lily Jokes With Friends
Lily One Liners
Which lily one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with lily? I can suggest the ones about lady and lollipop.
- What's a frog's favorite springtime sport? Lily-pad-leboarding!
- Why does snape teach potions and not herbology? He can't keep a Lily alive.
- What plant will kill you in 5 min or less if you just stand under it Water lily
- What is the fiercest flower in the garden?
The tiger lily. - Why should you never buy ecstasy off of Lily Savage Because it would be poor low-grade E
- What did the frog's girlfriend need when she was on her period? A lily pad.
- I always wondered why Snape never taught herbology. Then it dawned on me His Lily died
- Why were the frog's feet red? It jumped onto Lily's pad.
- What's the opposite of "lily white"? A racist term of some sort.
Hilarious Fun Lily Jokes to Bring Joy & Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about lily you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean kitty jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make lily pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Kid1: Hey Dad why am I called lily?
Dad: Because a lily petal fell on your head when you were a baby.
Kid2: Hey Dad why am I called rose?
Dad: Because a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby.
Kid3: herdurrrrahduhrgh#%*?
Dad: Shut up Cinderblock
A woman is walking home with her three daughters.
The eldest daughter turns to her and asks, "Mummy, how did I get my name?"
"Well sweetie, when we were bringing you home from the hospital, a rose petal landed on your head! So that's why we named you Rose".
The second daughter, now curious, asks the same question.
"Well darling, when we were bringing *you* home from the hospital, a *lily* petal landed on your head! So that's why we named you Lily."
The third girl asks "AAArrgghhrasfdg".
"Shhh, quiet now, Cinderblock".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
3 little girls walk up to their father
The first little girl asks, "Daddy, why is my name Rose?"
and the dad says, "because when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head, so we decided to call you rose."
The second little girl asks, "Daddy, why is my name Lily?"
and the dad says, "because when you were born, a lily petal fell on your head, so we decided to call you Lily."
The third little girl says, "hurdddurflbbbbb dur."
and the dad says, "shut up Cinderblock."
3 girls and thier mother were walking through a park...
Girl 1 turned to her mother and said...
Girl 1: Mommy, why is my name Lily?
Mom: Because when we took you out of the Hospital, a Lily petal fell on your head.
The second Daughter, now curious, asks the same question...
Girl 2: Why is my name Rose?
Mom: When we took you out of the Hospital, a rose petal landed onto your head
This is when the 3rd daughter pipes up and says...
Girl 3: AAAARRRGHFFFFJJJFSSSLLLHHH
Mom: Shhhhhhh, quiet down now Cinder Block
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
"Daddy, why is my name Rose?"
One day, a child came up to her father and said, "Daddy, why is my name Rose?"
He replied, "Well, when you were born, a rose fell on your head."
Later on, her younger sister came up to their father and asked, "Daddy, why was I named Lily?"
He replied, "Well, when you were born, a lily fell on your head."
Later, their brother came up to their father and said, "Ghigdsgjjo Hitsggdjkl."
He replied, "Shutup, Brick!"
Jesus, Moses, and an old bearded guy are playing golf...
Moses steps up first and lands his ball in a water hazard. He then proceeds to part the water where the ball is and lands it in the hole.
Jesus hits his ball and also lands it in the water hazard. So he walk on the water, picks it up, places it on a nearby lily pad and also lands it in the hole.
Now the old bearded guy steps up and just hits the ball with all his strength. The ball goes flying! It then proceeds to hit a nearby rooftop, bounce along the grass and land on a lily pad. A frog appears and eats the golf ball. Then out of nowhere a bird picks up the frog in its talons and flies off. As the bird flies over the green, the frog spits out the ball and it manages to land the ball in the hole...
After witnessing this Moses turns towards Jesus and says, "I hate playing with your dad."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A girl asked her dad "Why is my name Rose?"
Her dad said "Because when you were a baby, a rose petal fell to your forehead"
The girl's sister asked the same. "Daddy, why is my name Lily?"
"As a baby, the petal of a lily flower fell on your head."
The youngest daughter then approached.
"AUUGHMMGRNMMM"
"Shut up, Cinderblock." The dad said.
Dad, why am I called rose?
Daughter 1: Dad, why am I called rose?
Dad: well when you were born a rose petal landed on your head, so we took it as a sign.
Daughter 2: so Dad, why am I called Lily?
Dad: for the same reason, when you were born a lily petal landed on your head.
Daughter 3: JAVDJDJ SKAOAOSBDBSIJS
Dad: be quiet, Fridge.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
There was a father with three daughters...
The first daughter came up to him and said, "Dad, why is my name daisy?"
He replies, "because when you were born a daisy fell on your head."
The second daughter comes up to him and asks the same, "Dad, why is my name lily?"
"When you were born, a lily pad fell on your head."
The third daughter walks up to him and says, "MAUUUNGUNNFFFAUUUUUUU!"
"Shut up Brick!"
A Woman Was Walking With Her 3 Children
A mother was walking with her 3 children Rose, Lily, and Cinderblock.
Rose asks "Mom why am I named Rose?"
Her mother says "When we were coming home from the hospital a Rose fell on your head."
Lily, now curious, asks "Then why am I named Lily?"
Her mother says "When we were coming home from the hospital a Lily fell on your head."
Then Cinderblock says "ARGRGRGRGHDDEW BLDEWGD"
A woman is walking home with her three daughters
The eldest daughter turns to her and asks, "Mummy, how did get my name?"
"Well sweetie, when we were bringing you home from the hospital, a rose petal landed on your head! So that's why we named you Rose."
The second daughter, now curious, asks the same question.
"Well darling, when we were bringing you home from the hospital, a lily petal landed on your head! So that's why we named you Lily."
The third girl asks "HHGHGNGHGHNG?!?!?!
DDDNBHGHBHNGHHH!"
"Shhh, quiet now, Cinderblock."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
hahah brick!
There is a father and he has three daughters
The oldest daughter comes up to him and asks, "Dad, why is my name Lily?"
The father responds, "because when you were born, a Lily fell on your head."
Then the second oldest daughter comes up and asks, "dad, why is my name Daisy?"
The father responds, "because when you were born, a daisy fell on your head."
Then the youngest daughter comes up and says, "Muuughmmmummphhhhhh"
"Shut up, Brick!"
Lily went to a nearby pharmacy to buy her partner some deodorant.
A salesclerk comes up to her and asks what she's looking for.
"I'm looking for some deodorant for my boyfriend, but I don't know what kind he uses."
"Is it the ball type?"
"No," she replied. "It's for his armpits."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A baby cow walks up to a mom cow and says
"Mommy,why is my name rose",the mom says "because when you were born a rose petal fell on your head".a 2nd cow asks "why is my name lily?" the mom says "because a Lilly fell on your head when you were born".a third cow comes over and says "dur glu fo dur.".the mom then says "shut up cinder block!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Child 1: "Dad why did you name me rose?"
Child 1: "Dad why did you name me rose?"
Dad: "Because when you were born a little rose petal fell on your forehead, it was such a beautiful moment."
Child 2: "And why did you name me Lily?"
Dad: "Because when you were born a little Lily fluttered onto your forehead"
Child 3: ADGHRSSDF!!! MMHGJGD!!
Dad: "Shut up Boulder!"
WHAT'S YOUR NAME?!
asked the Killer
Lily: M-My name is Lily..
Killer: Okay, you've the same name as my mom, I'll let you live. How about you ?!
Marshall: I'm Marshall but my friends call me Lily!
A chicken walks into a library and up to the desk (Long)
"Buk", says the chicken,
The librarian hands the chicken a book. The chicken then leaves.
Five minutes later, the chicken returns. "Buk", says the chicken.
The librarian hands the chicken a book, and the chicken leaves again.
This goes on for seven or eight more times. Finally the librarian decides to take her break and follows the chicken.
The chicken goes behind the library to a pond. In the pond sits a frog on a lily pad.
The chicken throws the book into the pond. "Buk", says the chicken.
"Reddit", says the frog.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A woman had three young daughters...
One day, the first daughter came to her and said "Mama, how did I get my name?"
"Well, the day you were born, a beautiful lily flower floated in through the window and landed on your head, so we named you Lily."
The second daughter asks "Mama, how did I get my name?"
"Well, the day you were born, a beautiful daisy flower floated in through the window and landed on your head, so we named you Daisy."
Finally the third sister goes "Gah wah nah nah wah gah nah!"
And her sisters yell back "Shut up, Brick!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three frogs are sitting on a lily
The first frog goes "Croak"
The second frog says "Croak"
The third frog says "Ribbit"
The first frog pulls out a p**... and shoots the third one. Puzzled the second frog asks why. The first frog puts the p**... away and says "He knew too much"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
There are five cows on a farm, one momma cow and four baby calves.
The first baby walks up to the mom and asks, Momma, why is my name Rose? The mommy cow replies, Well honey, a rose petal fell on your head when you were born.
The next calf comes up and asks, Momma, why is my name Lily? The mother replies, Because honey, a lily petal fell on your head when you were born.
The third baby comes up and asks, Momma, why is my name Daisy? The momma cow again replieds" Well, when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head."
The final baby walks over and says, Huh Ruh Buh Duh! The momma cow says, Shut up, Cinderblock!
A mother is walking her 3 daughters home
The eldest daughter turns to her and asks, "Mummy, how did I get my name?"
"Well sweetie, when we were bringing you home from the hospital, a rose petal landed on your head! So that's why we named you Rose.
The second daughter, now curious, asks the same question.
"Well darling, when we were bringing you home from the hospital, a lily petal landed on your head! So that's why we named you Lily."
The third girl asks "HHGHGNGHGHNG?!?!?! DDDNBHGHBHNGHHH!!!" (do an exaggerated impression).
"Shhh, quiet now, Cinderblock."
A woman is walking home with her three daughters- Rose, Lily, and Cinderblock.
Rose asks her mother, Mom, why did you name me Rose?
To which her mother replies, Well sweetie, when we were coming home from the hospital with you a rose fell on your head!
Lily, curious now, asks her mother Mom, why did you name me after a flower too?
To which her mother replies, Well sweetie, when we were coming home from the hospital with you a lily fell on your head!
Cinderblock says to her mother, hghghdnbgh!!? dnbgh!??!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
There are five cows on a farm, one mommy cow and four baby calves.
The first baby walks up to the mom and asks: "Mom, why is my name Rose?" The mom replies: "Well, honey, when you were born a rose petal fell on your head."
The second calf comes up. "Mom, why is my name Lily?" The mom replies: "When you were born, sweetheart, a lily petal fell on your head."
The third calf comes up to mom. "Mom, why is my name Daisy?" The mom replies: "When you were born, my baby, a daisy petal fell on your head."
The fourth calf comes up. It says: "Hurr duh buh gah." The mom replies: "Oh, shut up, Cinderblock!"
Why are lilypads round?
So that it's easier for the hippos to jump on them.
A young boy holding a tiger lily walks past an old man on a porch......
.......and the old man says "Where you going son?" The boy replies "I'm gonna' catch a tiger! Wanna come?" The old man scoffs and says "No thanks." An hour later the boy walks back by dragging a tiger and the old man is amazed.
The next day the same boy walks past the old man, boy holding a dandelion, old man on the porch. Old man says "Where you going now son?" Boy replies "I'm gonna catch a lion! Wanna come?" The old man scoffs and says "No thanks." An hour later the boy walks back past the old man dragging a lion to the old man's intrigue.
The next day the boy walks past the old man sitting on the porch, this time holding a pussywillow. The young boy opens his mouth to speak but before he gets a word out the old man yells "Let me get my coat........"
