Lily Jokes

What are some Lily jokes?

Kid1: Hey Dad why am I called lily?

Dad: Because a lily petal fell on your head when you were a baby.

Kid2: Hey Dad why am I called rose?

Dad: Because a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby.

Kid3: herdurrrrahduhrgh#%*?

Dad: Shut up Cinderblock

A woman is walking home with her three daughters.

The eldest daughter turns to her and asks, "Mummy, how did I get my name?"

"Well sweetie, when we were bringing you home from the hospital, a rose petal landed on your head! So that's why we named you Rose".

The second daughter, now curious, asks the same question.

"Well darling, when we were bringing *you* home from the hospital, a *lily* petal landed on your head! So that's why we named you Lily."

The third girl asks "AAArrgghhrasfdg".

"Shhh, quiet now, Cinderblock".

3 little girls walk up to their father

The first little girl asks, "Daddy, why is my name Rose?"
and the dad says, "because when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head, so we decided to call you rose."
The second little girl asks, "Daddy, why is my name Lily?"
and the dad says, "because when you were born, a lily petal fell on your head, so we decided to call you Lily."
The third little girl says, "hurdddurflbbbbb dur."
and the dad says, "shut up Cinderblock."

3 girls and thier mother were walking through a park...

Girl 1 turned to her mother and said...

Girl 1: Mommy, why is my name Lily?

Mom: Because when we took you out of the Hospital, a Lily petal fell on your head.

The second Daughter, now curious, asks the same question...

Girl 2: Why is my name Rose?

Mom: When we took you out of the Hospital, a rose petal landed onto your head

This is when the 3rd daughter pipes up and says...

Girl 3: AAAARRRGHFFFFJJJFSSSLLLHHH

Mom: Shhhhhhh, quiet down now Cinder Block

A little girl asks her father how she got her name

"well honey a rose petal landed on your head as we were carrying you out of the hospital, so we named you rose."

his younger daughter runs up to him "and how did i get my name daddy?"

"well honey a lily petal landed on your head as we were carrying you out of the hospital, so we named you lily."

his son comes runnign up to him and yells "huuuuuuuuuuur flugerr dhuuuur"

"shut up cinder block"

"Daddy, why is my name Rose?"

One day, a child came up to her father and said, "Daddy, why is my name Rose?"
He replied, "Well, when you were born, a rose fell on your head."

Later on, her younger sister came up to their father and asked, "Daddy, why was I named Lily?"
He replied, "Well, when you were born, a lily fell on your head."

Later, their brother came up to their father and said, "Ghigdsgjjo Hitsggdjkl."
He replied, "Shutup, Brick!"

Jesus, Moses, and an old bearded guy are playing golf...

Moses steps up first and lands his ball in a water hazard. He then proceeds to part the water where the ball is and lands it in the hole.

Jesus hits his ball and also lands it in the water hazard. So he walk on the water, picks it up, places it on a nearby lily pad and also lands it in the hole.

Now the old bearded guy steps up and just hits the ball with all his strength. The ball goes flying! It then proceeds to hit a nearby rooftop, bounce along the grass and land on a lily pad. A frog appears and eats the golf ball. Then out of nowhere a bird picks up the frog in its talons and flies off. As the bird flies over the green, the frog spits out the ball and it manages to land the ball in the hole...

After witnessing this Moses turns towards Jesus and says, "I hate playing with your dad."

Why does snape teach potions and not herbology?

He can't keep a Lily alive.

What plant will kill you in 5 min or less if you just stand under it

Water lily

A girl asked her dad "Why is my name Rose?"

Her dad said "Because when you were a baby, a rose petal fell to your forehead"

The girl's sister asked the same. "Daddy, why is my name Lily?"

"As a baby, the petal of a lily flower fell on your head."

The youngest daughter then approached.

"AUUGHMMGRNMMM"

"Shut up, Cinderblock." The dad said.

There was a father with three daughters...

The first daughter came up to him and said, "Dad, why is my name daisy?"
He replies, "because when you were born a daisy fell on your head."
The second daughter comes up to him and asks the same, "Dad, why is my name lily?"
"When you were born, a lily pad fell on your head."
The third daughter walks up to him and says, "MAUUUNGUNNFFFAUUUUUUU!"
"Shut up Brick!"

A man has three daughters...

And one day his oldest daughter came up to him and asked, "Daddy, why is my name Lily?"
The man replied, "Because that's the first thing that fell on your head when you were born, sweetheart." The daughter thanked him and ran off.
Later, the middle daughter came up to him and said, "Daddy, why is my name Rose?"
The man replied, "Because that's the first thing that fell on your head when you were born, sweetheart." Again, his daughter thanked him and ran off.
Later, the last daughter came up to him, and said, "Uhhhouahhhaauma."
The man said, "Shut up, Cinder Block."

A frog is sitting on a lily pad in the middle of what is clearly a river. He shouts to a toad on the shore, "Hey, look at me, I'm on a lake!" The toad yells back,

"Naw man, you're in de-nile"

A Woman Was Walking With Her 3 Children

A mother was walking with her 3 children Rose, Lily, and Cinderblock.

Rose asks "Mom why am I named Rose?"

Her mother says "When we were coming home from the hospital a Rose fell on your head."

Lily, now curious, asks "Then why am I named Lily?"

Her mother says "When we were coming home from the hospital a Lily fell on your head."

Then Cinderblock says "ARGRGRGRGHDDEW BLDEWGD"

I remember my parent's reaction when I brought home my first A+ on a test

It was something like Who's Lily and You aren't even in AP Biology

A young boy holding a tiger lily walks past an old man on a porch......

.......and the old man says "Where you going son?" The boy replies "I'm gonna' catch a tiger! Wanna come?" The old man scoffs and says "No thanks." An hour later the boy walks back by dragging a tiger and the old man is amazed.

The next day the same boy walks past the old man, boy holding a dandelion, old man on the porch. Old man says "Where you going now son?" Boy replies "I'm gonna catch a lion! Wanna come?" The old man scoffs and says "No thanks." An hour later the boy walks back past the old man dragging a lion to the old man's intrigue.

The next day the boy walks past the old man sitting on the porch, this time holding a pussywillow. The young boy opens his mouth to speak but before he gets a word out the old man yells "Let me get my coat........"

Have you ever wondered why Severus Snape taught Potions and not Herbology?

It's because his Lily died.

A baby cow walks up to a mom cow and says

"Mommy,why is my name rose",the mom says "because when you were born a rose petal fell on your head".a 2nd cow asks "why is my name lily?" the mom says "because a Lilly fell on your head when you were born".a third cow comes over and says "dur glu fo dur.".the mom then says "shut up cinder block!"

Child 1: "Dad why did you name me rose?"

Child 1: "Dad why did you name me rose?"

Dad: "Because when you were born a little rose petal fell on your forehead, it was such a beautiful moment."

Child 2: "And why did you name me Lily?"

Dad: "Because when you were born a little Lily fluttered onto your forehead"

Child 3: ADGHRSSDF!!! MMHGJGD!!

Dad: "Shut up Boulder!"

Why does Snape teach potions and not Herbology?

Because his Lily died

A mother is walking her 3 daughters home

The eldest daughter turns to her and asks, "Mummy, how did I get my name?"

"Well sweetie, when we were bringing you home from the hospital, a rose petal landed on your head! So that's why we named you Rose.

The second daughter, now curious, asks the same question.

"Well darling, when we were bringing you home from the hospital, a lily petal landed on your head! So that's why we named you Lily."

The third girl asks "HHGHGNGHGHNG?!?!?! DDDNBHGHBHNGHHH!!!" (do an exaggerated impression).

"Shhh, quiet now, Cinderblock."

A woman is walking home with her three daughters- Rose, Lily, and Cinderblock.

Rose asks her mother, Mom, why did you name me Rose?

To which her mother replies, Well sweetie, when we were coming home from the hospital with you a rose fell on your head!

Lily, curious now, asks her mother Mom, why did you name me after a flower too?

To which her mother replies, Well sweetie, when we were coming home from the hospital with you a lily fell on your head!

Cinderblock says to her mother, hghghdnbgh!!? dnbgh!??!

A man and his 3 daughters

This was one of my favorites from middle school:
So a man has 3 daughters and he is sitting alone in his room one night.
His oldest daughter comes in and asks, "Dad, why did you name me Rose?" He responds, "Well when you were born a rose petal fell on your forehead."
She leaves and the second daughter walks in and asks "Dad, why did you name me Lily?" The Dad replies, "Well when you were born a lily petal fell on your forehead."
Finally, his youngest daughter enters. She is deformed and goes "AAARGGGHLLAHAH" to which the Dad says "Shut up Cinderblock."

There are five cows on a farm, one momma cow and four baby calves.

The first baby walks up to the mom and asks, Momma, why is my name Rose? The mommy cow replies, Well honey, a rose petal fell on your head when you were born.


The next calf comes up and asks, Momma, why is my name Lily? The mother replies, Because honey, a lily petal fell on your head when you were born.


The third baby comes up and asks, Momma, why is my name Daisy? The momma cow again replieds" Well, when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head."


The final baby walks over and says, Huh Ruh Buh Duh! The momma cow says, Shut up, Cinderblock!

The naming of my children

Yesterday, my eldest daughter asked me,"Father, why is my name Rose?". I explain to her it was because a rose petal landed on her head as she was birthed on our patio. Curious, my middle child asked me,"Father, why is my name Lily?". I explain to her it was because when she was birthed a lily flower petal fell onto her head after it blew in through a window. My youngest grunted,"Raaghhrgh?". I reply,"Quiet down now Cinderblock we already fed you!".

There are five cows on a farm, one mommy cow and four baby calves.

The first baby walks up to the mom and asks: "Mom, why is my name Rose?" The mom replies: "Well, honey, when you were born a rose petal fell on your head."

The second calf comes up. "Mom, why is my name Lily?" The mom replies: "When you were born, sweetheart, a lily petal fell on your head."

The third calf comes up to mom. "Mom, why is my name Daisy?" The mom replies: "When you were born, my baby, a daisy petal fell on your head."

The fourth calf comes up. It says: "Hurr duh buh gah." The mom replies: "Oh, shut up, Cinderblock!"

Lily walked up to her father and asked a question....

"Father," said Lily, "why did you name me Lily?"
Lily's father smiled, "On the day you were born, a gentle breeze carried a lily through the window, and it gently fell onto your forehead, and so we named you Lily."
Lily smiled at her father, and went back to playing.

On that same day, Lily's sister, Rose, walked up to her father and said, "Father, why did you name me Rose?"
Rose's father tousled her hair, and replied, "When we left the hospital on the day of your birth, a rose petal carried in the breeze fell upon your forehead, and so we named you Rose."
Rose smiled, and went back to playing.

Later that day, the youngest girl in the family, Cinderblock, walked up to her father and said "GRRRAAAaaaAAAAaaHHH!!"

Rose walks up to her father

"Father," she asks. Why did you name me rose?

"Well when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head."

Delighted, she scampers off into the next room. His second daughter comes running into the room.

"Daddy daddy! Why did you name me Lily?"

"Well when you were born a lily petal fell on your head."

Joyfully, Lily skips out into the next room. His third daughter bolts into the room.

"Hurrrrrnauuufffff."

"**SHUT UP CINDERBLOCK!**"

Why should you never buy ecstasy off of Lily Savage

Because it would be poor low-grade E

hahah brick!

There is a father and he has three daughters

The oldest daughter comes up to him and asks, "Dad, why is my name Lily?"

The father responds, "because when you were born, a Lily fell on your head."

Then the second oldest daughter comes up and asks, "dad, why is my name Daisy?"

The father responds, "because when you were born, a daisy fell on your head."

Then the youngest daughter comes up and says, "Muuughmmmummphhhhhh"

"Shut up, Brick!"

How to make Lily jokes?

We have collected gags and puns about Lily to have fun with. Do you want to stand out in a crowd with a good sense of humour joking about Lily? If Yes here are a lot more hilarious lines and funny Lily pick up lines to share with friends.

Joko Jokes