The Best 67 Lightbulb Jokes
Following is our collection of funniest Lightbulb jokes. There are some lightbulb teamsters jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these lightbulb lamp puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Funny Lightbulb Jokes and Puns
How many Democrats does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. They only *talk* about change.
How many Alzheimer's patients does it take in to screw in a lightbulb?
To get to the other side
How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. They're afraid of change- even if it makes the world a brighter place.
(
How many mystery novel writers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two. One to screw it in almost all the way, and another one to give it a surprising twist at the end.
How does a Jewish mother change a lightbulb?
"No, that's all right. I'll just sit here in the dark."
How many non-humorous people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One
How many Irishmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two. One to hold the bulb and one to drink until the room spins.
How many Dragonball Z characters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Find out next time, on Dragonball Z!
SRS bait.
How many feminists does to take to screw in a lightbulb?
Only one. She stands with the bulb and the world revolves around her.
How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One. She just holds it in place, while the world revolves around her. * Beverly Hills ninja edit... rotates to revolves
How many Deadheads (Grateful Dead fans) does it take to change a lightbulb?
No one knows, they wait for it to burn out and follow it around for twenty years.
You can explore lightbulb bulb reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean lightbulb edison dad jokes. There are also lightbulb puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, they just hold it in the socket and expect the world to revolve around them.
How many Vietnam Vets does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
YOU DON'T KNOW! YOU WEREN'T THERE!
How many programmers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None. We don't address hardware issues.
How many Freudians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two.
One to screw in the bulb and the other to hold the penis..*ER..LADDER! I MEANT LADDER!*
How many LGBT supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?
The lightbulb is fine the way it is. Society just needs to change the way it looks at it.
How many perverts does it take to put in a lightbulb?
Only one, but it takes the whole Emergency Room to remove it.
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Ten. One to change the lightbulb and nine to blog about how empowering it was.
How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb
None. Who needs a lightbulb when there's a glass ceiling.
How many tumblrinas does it take to change a lightbulb?
You may think that a burnt out bulb needs to change just because the room is too dark *for you* to see anything, so it *must* be changed, but I don't care, it's beautiful, you should respect its right to be burnt out and learn to be more accepting of darker rooms, check your filament privileges you ableist scum. Anyone who disagrees with this is a burnt-out-bulbophobe and a darknessphobe. Thanks for being so understanding.
How many "friend zoned" guys does it take to change a lightbulb?
How many "friend zoned" guys does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They just compliment it and get mad when it won't screw.
How many I.T. guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
none. That's a hardware problem
but have you tried turning it on and off again?
What's the difference between a lightbulb and a pregnant woman?
You can unscrew a lightbulb.
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. You don't need a lightbulb when you have a glass ceiling.
How many Yale students does it take to change a lightbulb?
*One to hold the bulb up to the socket and wait for the world to revolve around them, three to scream at the circuit breaker and belittle it for controlling power, and eight others to console the first four while they tweet about how problematic this traumatic experience has been for everyone.*
How many Microsoft executives does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None. They just redefine 'darkness' as an industry standard.
How many gay guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Just one, but it takes two doctors and a nurse to get it out.
How many Trump supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?
Look, we can change the lightbulb. That I will tell you. We're changing it, ok? And I understand what you're saying, I hear it all the time. People call me and say "Is the lightbulb really dead?". Thats what they are asking me, its unbelievable. The lightbulb is in big trouble, that I can tell you. But we are going to change it.
How many "sup dude"s does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, it's already lit fam.
How many dead prostitutes does it take to change a lightbulb?
Obviously not 8, because its still dark in my basement.
How many protestors do you need to change a lightbulb?
Trick question. Protestors don't change anything.
How many Feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One.
Men can be Feminists, too.
How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
It's a really obscure number and you've probably never heard of it.
How do feminists screw in a lightbulb?
By holding the bulb up to the socket and waiting for the world to revolve around them
how many Americans does it take to change a lightbulb?
None; they're content to wander around in the dark pretending everything's okay.
How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Apparently more than 40, because my basement's still dark
How many morons does it take to change a lightbulb?
14,000.
1 to hold the lightbulb, 4 to hold the chair, and 13,995 to spin the house.
How many ninjas does it take to...
Where did that lightbulb come from?!
How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Only two, but its kinda hard to get em in there.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two. One to beat the room for being black and one to arrest the bulb for being broke.
How many LAPD officers does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. They shoot the room for being black and beat up the bulb for being broke.
How many Republicans does it take to change a light-bulb?
None.
Trump lies, tells them it was changed and they sit in the dark.
How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb.
Only 2, it's just really difficult getting them in the lightbulb.
How many fat activists does it take to change a lightbulb?
The lightbulb is beautiful the way it is. Society needs to change and learn to accept and stop shaming lightbulbs that don't conform to its standards.
How many Germans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Just one. They're efficient and not very funny.
How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?
The lightbulb just burned out; this is not the time to discuss it.
How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
It takes two, very tiny people, to screw, in a lightbulb.
How many dead people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Apparently not 17, cause my basement is still dark.
How many corpses does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
It must be more than eight, 'cause my basement's still dark.
How many divorced men does it take to change a lightbulb?
We wouldn't know, the women always get to keep the house.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
5.
1 to change the bulb and 4 to shoot the room up for being black
How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. They will never allow change, even if it makes the world a brighter place.
One day I changed a lightbulb, crossed the road, and walked into a bar.
Then I realized my whole life was a joke.
How many Karens did it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One.
She just holds the lightbulb in the socket and expects the rest of the world to revolve around her.
Two men are discussing how they'll reach a lightbulb that needs to be changed.
Man 1: would you like the ladder or the step stool?
Man 2: I prefer the ladder.
Man 1: ok, step stool it is.
How many Nintendo fans does it take to change a lightbulb?
Who knows? They're all too busy playing with the switch.
How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?
...
Change? That's socialism.
How many conspiracy theorists does it take to change a lightbulb?
The real question is: who broke the lightbulb and why are they keeping us in the dark?
How many narcissists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Just one.All he has to do is hold it in place while the world revolves aroudn him.
How many conspiracy theorists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Do your own research.
How many psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb?
It doesn't matter. How did that joke make you feel?
How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?
One.
They are very efficient and don't have a sense of humor.
How many therapists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Just one.
But it's essential that the lightbulb wants to change.
How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?
One pair of Hans should suffice
How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Just 2, but how do they get in there?
How many developers/mods does it take to change a lightbulb?
They actually prefer dark mode
Fiction Logic: How many anime dudes does it take to change a lightbulb
One...
But it takes them 10 god damn episodes.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the lightbulb incandescent jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working lightbulb mras piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.