Lifestyle Jokes
47 lifestyle jokes and hilarious lifestyle puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about lifestyle that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Discover the funniest jokes about a healthy lifestyle. Learn from a counsellor how to stay positive and regard healthy lifestyle choices as a reward instead of something to condemn. Read the article to find out a different style of joke about healthy lifestyle to make your day!
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Funniest Lifestyle Short Jokes
Short lifestyle jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The lifestyle humour may include short fashion jokes also.
- Thanks to my recent change to a healthier lifestyle, I am no longer fat and ugly Now I'm just ugly
- A transgender four year old is like a vegan cat. We all know who's making the lifestyle choices.
- You're meeting identical triplets tonight. One's from the Army, one's a lifestyle Vegan, and one is a diehard Trump supporter. How do you tell them apart? Don't worry. They'll tell you.
- This simple change in lifestyle will help you lose 2 pounds every week! Just invest in the British stock market
- When I was a kid I thought Vegetarian and Lesbian were the same thing. When I was a kid I thought Vegetarian and Lesbian were the same thing.
Well, both lifestyles do lack...meat. - I spend the mornings in my rocking chair, and in the afternoon I go out in my wheelchair. I've got a real rock 'n' roll lifestyle.
- Did you guys hear about the fat geologist? It wasn't a poor diet. It was the sedimentary lifestyle
- Breaking News: Legal alien lived a lavish lifestyle for years by impersonating music icon Sting. Today he finally turned himself into the police.
- Most people don't know that boulders are morbidly obese. It's from having a sedimentary lifestyle.
- Fat people have the most active lifestyle. The times they are actually not doing anything, they have to maintain their active lifestyle buy actively eating.
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Lifestyle One Liners
Which lifestyle one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with lifestyle? I can suggest the ones about living and healthy living.
- What would Cardi B be called if she decided to live a healthy lifestyle ? Cardi O
- Why is the lesbian lifestyle so expensive? They're always eating out.
- If James Bond led such a high-risk lifestyle... why wasn't he James Stock?
-Caroline - what does a lazy geologist have? a sedimentary lifestyle
- I'm not a germaphobe. I just don't agree with their lifestyle.
- I used to be addicted to drugs. It was a high maintenance lifestyle.
- Married men don't have a Lifestyle.... They live according to Wifestyle
- I don't approve of the homosexual lifestyle... but $50 is $50.
- What is the similarity between a lesbian and a vegan? Both lifestyles lack meat
- What does a vegetarian and a lesbian have in common? Both lifestyles lack meat
- I've recently been experimenting with the furry lifestyle. I think it really *suits* me.
- What do you call an easy lifestyle revolving around eating Chinese food? Lo Meintenance
- Tightrope walkers are often very happy people. Because they have a balanced lifestyle.
- I wouldn't say wine tasting is a hobby of mine. It's a lifestyle.
- Why are some rocks so lazy? They live a sedimentary lifestyle.
Comical Lifestyle Jokes and Gems that Will Get You in Laughter Land
What funny jokes about lifestyle you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean life experience jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make lifestyle pranks.
I have recently become a new man
I don't drink, i smoke very rarely, i don't stare at girls, i go to sleep early, i wake up early and I work hard everyday. My supervisors are happy with me. I will definitely abandon this lifestyle once i get out of jail.
My friend who's father is a multi-billionaire
My friend whose father is a multi-billionaire loves to talk about his extravagant lifestyle. One day, I asked him just exactly how large is the land owned by his father.
He answered I'll give you an idea, I can start driving at one end of the land in the morning at full speed, in one direction, and still not reach the other side of the land at night.
I could totally relate to that , I said
Really?
Yeah, I drive a Hyundai
I go to the Jim every morning
Are you thin? Are you overweight? Are you fighting the battle of the bulge? Do you have a sedentary lifestyle? Are you plain lazy? Do you have someone or the other always telling you to go to the gym?
Here's something for you...
"Instead of calling my bathroom the John, I call it the Jim.
That way it sounds a lot better when I tell people I go to the Jim first thing every morning :-)"
In the interests of self care, and to promote healthier lifestyle choices for myself now that I'm single, each morning when I get up, I look myself in the mirror, and say the three little words I always used to say to my wife
"You're too fat"
I lead a pretty rock n roll lifestyle
I wake up s**... and roll out of bed
Your momma is so fat..
That she really needs to make an immediate lifestyle change. Heart disease is the number one killer in America. There is no better time than now to make a change before it's too late.
Yo mama so fat
>!We're genuinely worried about her. That kind of lifestyle is unhealthy. You should encourage her to walk more and lay off the Ben&j**...'s.!<
I wanted to be a vigilante but...
the h**... lifestyle is too deadly.
A school teacher invited a Native American to give a presentation to his students about their culture
After discussing history, traditions and lifestyle, the conversation turned to language.
"One of the interesting things about our language," he said, "is that there are no cuss words."
"But then what do you say if you are hammering a nail and accidentally hit your finger?" asked a student.
"In that case," he replied, "we use your language."
A wealthy man came home from a gambling trip and told his wife that he had lost their entire fortune and that they'd have to drastically alter their life-style.
"If you'll just learn to cook," he said, "we can fire the chef."
"Okay," she said. "And if you learn how to make love, we can fire the gardener."
Malcolm X
TIL that right before his death, Malcolm X was working on a book denouncing the factory farm system and advocating for a vegetarian lifestyle. It was going to be called "By Any Greens Necessary"
You ever been to the butcher with the chastity f**...?
Say what you will about the lifestyle, but his meat simply can't be beat.
