JokoJokes

Lifeboat Jokes

10 lifeboat jokes and hilarious lifeboat puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about lifeboat that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Share These Lifeboat Jokes With Friends




Humorous Lifeboat Jokes to Bring Fun and Laughter to Your Life

What is a good lifeboat joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.

A lawyer, a priest and a doctor are all on a ship filled with children and it begins to sink.

They all jump into the life boats, but due to the weight, the life boats start sinking as well.
The doctor exclaims Save the children! And begins to jump out of the lifeboat.
The lawyer grabs the doctor and pulls him back stating Screw the children!
The priest says Do we have time?

A lawyer, priest, and social worker are on a ship that hits an iceberg...

The captain comes over the intercom: "Everyone please make your way to the lifeboats".
The social worker yells out: "Women & children first!"
The lawyer starts pushing his way towards the boats: "Screw the children!"
The priest responds: "Do we have time?"

George Washington, George Bush, and Bill Clinton are on a boat.

The boat begins to sink.
George Washington stands up and valiently exclaims, "Save the Women!"
George Bush runs to the lifeboat, shouting, "Screw the women!"
bill clinton stands up and says excitedly, "Do we have time?"

A twofer

A priest and a lawyer are on a ferry boat along with a bunch of kids who are on a field trip. The ferry boat hits a rock and starts to sink. The priest and the lawyer lower a lifeboat. The lawyer jumps in, and yells, "Get in! Hurry up!"
The priest says, "What about the kids?"
The lawyer says, "Screw the kids!"
And the priest says, "Do you think we'll have time?"

American presidents are on a sinking ship!

Ford says: What do we do?
Bush says: Man the lifeboats!
Reagan says: What lifeboats?
Carter says: Women and children first!
Nixon says: Screw the women!
Clinton says: You think we have time?

What happened when five fat French men got in the lifeboat?

Cinq.

What's the best part of being a lesbian in 1912?

Both got seats on the titanic's lifeboats.

A blonde, brunette and a redhead...

...have a breaststroke race across the English Channel. The brunette comes in first, the redhead comes in second, and the blonde never finishes.
In the lifeboat, the blonde says, "I don't want to be a tattletale, but the other two used their arms."

Two wires at sea

Two wires were on an ocean cruise when the ship sprung a leak and sank. The solid core wire managed to climb into a lifeboat and head to safety.
The other was stranded.

What did the captain of the Titanic say to the guy lowering a half empty lifeboat?

Too soon.

Lifeboat joke, What did the captain of the Titanic say to the guy lowering a half empty lifeboat?

Share These Lifeboat Jokes With Friends



Lifeboat joke, What did the captain of the Titanic say to the guy lowering a half empty lifeboat?

Lifeboat joke, What did the captain of the Titanic say to the guy lowering a half empty lifeboat?