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Life Support Machines Jokes

7 life support machines jokes and hilarious life support machines puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about life support machines that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Life Support Machines Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.

What is a good life support machines joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.

In one Intensive care unit

people always died on the same bed at 11 am on a Sunday morning, regardless of their condition. This puzzled medical staff, so a group of doctors decided to observe the bed in secret and waited for the fateful hour. Some held crosses and prayer books to ward off evil influences, while the less superstitious had video cameras to catch the whole thing on tape. At the 11th hour, the door to the ward slowly opened, then a cleaner came in, disconnected the life support machine and plugged in a vacuum cleaner.

There was this haunted ICU in a hospital... People always died at 3pm on a Sunday afternoon, regardless of their medical condition.

This puzzled medical staff, so a group of doctors decided to keep a watch on the bed in secret and waited for the fateful hour.
At 3pm, the door to the ward slowly opened, then a cleaner came in, disconnected the life support machine and plugged in a vacuum cleaner.

LPT: Unplug your electronics to conserve energy, except for the fridge and the life support machine:

In those instances, you'd just be wasting vegetables.

Two IT pros are being held on charges for m**...

The local hospital's life support machine was acting up, so they turned it off and back on again.

A patient kept complaining about his life-support machine making a weird noise

So I tried turning it off and back on again.

An electrician gets to the ICU part of a hospital....

He sees the patients all connected to life support machines and say :
" You guys better take a deep breath, i'm going to change the fuse. "

Life Support

After the birth of their first child Tom and Sarah decided it was time to write a will and get their affairs in order. They went to a lawyer and outlined for him their ideas about how their estate should be handled.
The lawyer then asked them questions about what medical means should be employed should they become severely injured.
Tom spoke up, "I don't want my life regulated by some machine. I just can't stand the idea of receiving my nourishment from a bottle."
Sarah took Tom's words to heart. When they got home, she cut the TV cord and dumped out all of Tom's beer.

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