The Best 55 Libra Jokes
Following is our collection of funniest Libra jokes. There are some libra capricorn jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these libra weigh puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Funny Libra Jokes and Puns
Library suicide
A man goes to the library and asks if they have a book on how to commit suicide.
The librarian says "Yeh, I think we do, it should be at the back row on the top shelf".
The man goes and looks, even climbs a ladder to look at the top but still can't find it.
"Still no luck" says the man.
The librarian replies "Oh, the last person who borrowed it mustn't have brought it back"
Couldn't get into the library the other day...
... it was fully booked.
Library joke
Why are librarians so lonely?
They're always by them shelves
Just wanted to see if that library joke checked out
Sorry for all the library jokes, I'll put them on hold
I have a librarian friend and a grocer friend who rarely want to hang out with me
because they're just too shelf conscious.
My library charges me a dollar for every book I check out.
It's a paper-view.
So I was in the library when this cute girl came up and asked to borrow my external hard drive
It was at this point I realized she wanted the (D:)
I went to the library once and asked for a book about cliffhangers.
Then suddenly..
So I was in the library the other day...
My black friend comes over and ask me where the color printers were at. I looked up and said "it's 2015 man you can use whatever printer you want".
Why are librarians so shy?
Their occupation makes them very shelf conscious.
I went to the library today
I said: do you have any books on suicide?
She said: we did, but no one brings them backο»Ώ
I went to the library. I said,"Can I borrow a book about suicide?"
The guy said,"We did have one, but we never got it back."
You can explore libra uranus reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean libra pisces dad jokes. There are also libra puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
How is a librarian like a sex addict?
Their favorite past time is between the covers.
I went to the library and asked for a book on Pavlov's dog and Shrodinger's Cat
The librarian said "That rings a bell but I don't know if it's here or not."
I went to the library and asked if they had any books on SchrΓΆdinger's cat and Pavlov's dog.
The librarian said that they may or may not have it, but that it rings a bell.
I went to the library and asked if they had the book about tiny penises...
The librarian said, "I don't think it's in yet."
I said, "Yes, that's the one."
In the library:
"Excuse me, where are the books about paranoia?"
"They are... right behind you."
Where does a librarian sleep?
Between the covers.
I will now show myself to the door.
Why did the librarian hush the mime?
Because actions speak louder than words.
Why are libraries so strict?
Because they have to go by the book.
So I was at the Library today
.. And a black Gentleman came over to me and asked where the coloured printer was. I replied "Man its 2016 you can use any printer!"
I was at the library finding books about missing indigenous women
Couldn't find any
I went to library to check out a book on suicide.
The librarian asked me "who would bring it back?"
I went to the library today and said, "I'd like to check these books out."
The librarian said, "Sorry, that's actually against the rules."
"Huh?!"
The librarian replied, "You see, checking them out only makes them shelf conscious."
My library warms my heart
from my wood burning stove.
What did the librarian say to the Youtuber?
Read more.
Someone came to my library and asked for help finding a where's Waldo book
I told them they weren't ready
What did the librarian say to the lazy student?
read more...
Went to the library and asked where the self-help books were.
Librarian refused to tell me. She said it would be defeating the purpose.
I went to the library and asked if they had any books on shelves...
The librarian replied, "Yes, all of them."
Why did the librarian keep falling down?
Because she was in the non-friction section
I went to the library and asked the librarian if they had any books on suicide.
He said that they did but they never came back.
Do you know why libraries don't have books about suicide?
They never get returned
I was at a library and a black guy asked where the colored printer was. I said, "bro, it's 2017, use any printer you want."
I was at a library and a black guy asked where the colored printer was. I said, "bro, it's 2017, use any printer you want."
libraries are like communist bookstores.
No food allowed.
I was in the library the other day when a black man came up to me and asked me where the colored printers were?
I replied, "Dude, it's 2018, you can use whatever printer you want."
What did the library robber have to do when he was caught?
He had to book it.
The Librarian
What time does the library open? the man on the phone asked.
Annoyed, the librarian composed himself before he answered.
9 am, came the reply. And what's the idea of calling me at home in the middle of the night to ask a question like that?
Not until 9 am? the man asked in a disappointed voice.
The librarian began to get angry.
No, not until 9 am, said the librarian. Why do you want to get in before 9 am?
Who said I wanted to get in? the man sighed sadly. I want to get o
I went into the library and asked for a book on turtles.
the lady said, "hardback?"
I replied, "yes, with little wrinkled heads"
Went to the library and asked do you have the sex book on small dicks, she said it's not in yet, I replied.
Yes that's the one.
Went to the library to get a book co-written by Pavlov and Schroedinger.
Librarian said "it rings a bell but I'm not sure if we have it in or not"
What do librarians call breathalyzers?
The DUI decimal system
Librarian: Can I help you?
Dave: Yeah, I'm looking for a book about-
Librarian: Being psychic?
Dave: No...
Librarian: One day that will work.
When I was in the library I saw a book titled how to solve 50% of your problems.
So i bought 2 books
Libraries have really expanded in terms of what they can help with - I just saw a man bring his laptop to the help desk asking how he can check the weather
The librarian had to show him how to use windows
I went to the library looking for a copy of the Kama sutra...
I couldn't find it. So I complained to the librarian.
They Replied "Ah that's cause it's in a different position every week"
I went to the library and asked the librarian if she knew where books on paranoia were.
She said "They're right behind you".
I went to the library and asked the librarian if she knew where the dystopian fiction books were.
She said, "next to the poster over there, but I don't see why you'd want to read those. We just got a bunch nonfiction biography books, go check those out instead".
Why does the library have so many floors?
CAUSE IT'S FULL OF STORIES!!!
I'm so sorry
At the library
-Excuse me, sir, where can I find books about paranoia?
-Right behind you!
The library in our town had thousands and thousands of books
But even then everyone referred to it as the two storey building.
What building has the most stories?
A Library!
I was in a library and a black guy came up to me.
"Where's the coloured printer?" He said
"Mate, it's 2020 you can use any printer you want" I replied
Ask Any Librarian, What's The Opposite of Capitalism?
lowercasism
At the library
Me: Do you have a book on how to commit suicide?
Librarian: Of course.
Me: Can I borrow it?
Librarian: No, you might not return it.
Me: .......
What happens in a library bathroom?
People take shhhhhhhits
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the libra astrology jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working libra workup piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.