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Lewinsky Jokes

90 lewinsky jokes and hilarious lewinsky puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about lewinsky that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Lewinsky Short Jokes

Short lewinsky jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The lewinsky humour may include short impeachment jokes also.

  1. Apparently Monica Lewinsky won't be voting for hillary clinton this election She says the last Clinton presidency left a bad taste in her mouth
  2. Why are people acting like Kamala Harris is the first woman to obtain such a high ranking position in the US Government? Have we all forgotten that Monica Lewinsky was directly under Bill Clinton?
  3. Monica Lewinsky takes a dress to her dry cleaner. "Do you think you'll be able to get the stain out?" she asks.
    "Come again?" the man at the counter responds.
    "No, mustard," Monica replies
  4. I really thought Monica Lewinsky should be on a dollar.. but she's already had her face on a Bill.
  5. Monica Lewinsky was recently offered a new position at a prestigious boarding school. Headmaster.
  6. Monica Lewinsky is going to vote for Bernie The last time a Clinton was in office it left a bad taste in her mouth.
  7. What do you call a person who kneels after the President makes inappropriate comments? Monica Lewinsky
  8. Monica Lewinsky said it 20 years ago and she said it again this year Hillary Clinton wasn't the right person for the job.
  9. What do Monica Lewinsky and a vending machine have in common? Both say Please insert Bill.
  10. Why Didn't Monica Lewinsky Vote For Hilary Clinton? Because the last Clinton presidency left a bad taste in her mouth.

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Lewinsky One Liners

Which lewinsky one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with lewinsky? I can suggest the ones about monica lewinsky and presidential.

  1. Monica Lewinsky i have a joke I have an intern joke and it ... nevermind.
  2. What is the volume of Monica Lewinsky's mouth? About one U.S Leader.
  3. What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth? One US leader.
  4. What was Monica Lewinsky's job at the White House? Receiving heads of state.
  5. Monica Lewinsky joke I have an intern joke and it... nevermind.
  6. How much liquid can Monica Lewinskys mouth hold? One U.S. Liter
  7. Why is Monica Lewinsky so poor Because she's always blowing bills
  8. Why doesn't Chelsea Clinton have a brother or sister? Monica Lewinsky swallowed them.
  9. Bill Clinton right now, texting Monica Lewinsky "You up?"
  10. what do you call an instrument that blows you? harmonica lewinsky
  11. What does Monica Lewinsky say to call her dog over? "Come, spot!"
  12. Everybody hated Monica Lewinsky But now everybody wants her to get her old job back.
  13. What do Monica Lewinsky and Bill Clinton have in common? They blew a seal.
  14. Why did Monica Lewinsky quit politics? Because it left a bad taste in her mouth!
  15. How is Monica Lewinsky like a vending machine? They both say, "Insert Bill here"

Monica Lewinsky Jokes

Here is a list of funny monica lewinsky jokes and even better monica lewinsky puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I heard that Monica Lewinsky voted Republican this year. The Democrats left her with a bad taste in her mouth.
  • Monica Lewinsky says she won't endorse Hillary for president... "The last Clinton presidency left a bad taste in my mouth"
  • Why isnt Monica Lewinsky voting for Hillary? The last Clinton left a bad taste in her mouth.
  • Monica Lewinski released a statement that said she would be voting for Donald Trump the last Clinton presidency left a bad taste in her mouth
  • What does Monica Lewinsky and a soda machine have in common? They both say "insert Bill here"
  • What did Bill Clinton find attractive about Monica Lewinsky? He said she had the prettiest smile he ever came across.
  • Did you hear Monica Lewinsky became a republican? The democrats just left a bad taste in her mouth
  • I highly doubt that Monica Lewinsky will support Hillary in 2016. I mean, the last time a Clinton was a president, it left a really bad taste in her mouth.
  • Monica Lewinsky just turned 43 It seems like only yesterday she was crawling on the floor of the White House
  • I'd rather vote for Monica Lewinsky than Hillary Clinton... ...because at least a little bit of Bill rubbed off on Monica!
Lewinsky joke, I'd rather vote for Monica Lewinsky than Hillary Clinton...

Uplifting Lewinsky Jokes to have Hilarious Fun with Friends

What funny jokes about lewinsky you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean intern jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make lewinsky pranks.

Dry Cleaning

Monica Lewinsky walks into her dry cleaning store and tells the guy, "I've got another dress for you to clean."
Slightly hard of hearing, the clerk replies, "Come again?"
"No," says Monica. "Mustard this time."

Monica Lewinsky walks into a cleaners....

with a dress and yells at the old owner who is hard of hearing
"I need to dry clean my dress"
The owner cups his hand next to his ear
"come again"
"No it's ketchup this time"

Another day at the White House

After returning from the White House after a forum on s**... in the workplace, Monica Lewinsky takes her dress to the dry cleaner.
The dry cleaner has an ear infection and is having trouble hearing.
Monica says to the dry cleaner, I need my dress cleaned. The dry cleaner does not hear her well and says "come again", and Monica replies, "No, mustard"

What's white, located in washington and has a president within it?

Monica Lewinsky's teeth.

What was Monica Lewinsky's high school yearbook superlative?

Most likely to s**... seed.

A man walks into a t-shirt store...

There are 3 shirts on display.
The first has a picture of Richard Nixon with a white mustache. Below the picture is titled "Got Milk."
The second tee shirt has a picture of Ronald Reagan with a white mustache. It is entitled "Forgot Milk."
The third tee shirt has a picture of Monica Lewinsky with a white mustache. It is entitled "Not Milk."

Monica Lewinsky just released a statement on the presidential candidacy of Hillary Clinton...

She was quoted as saying that she can't vote for Hillary, because the last Clinton presidency left a bad taste in her mouth.

Monica Lewinski walks into the dry cleaners

She says, "I have another dress for you to clean."
The owner who is slightly hard of hearing replies, "Come again?"
"Oh no, it's just mustard"

I came in second at a Monica Lewinsky look alike competition. . .

. . . the judge said I was close, but no cigar.

Did you hear that Monica Lewinsky stopped smoking cigars?

Now she's just bummimg cigarettes!

Who is Monica Lewinsky's favorite football player?

Ha Ha Clinton d**...

Apparently Monica Lewinsky is voting Republican

The Democrats must've left a bad taste in her mouth
(Shamefully stolen from facebook sorry if it's a repost)

Monica Lewinsky has released the following statement on Hillary Clinton's run for the American Presidency:

"I will not vote for Hillary Clinton. The last Clinton Presidency left a very bad taste in my mouth."

The US can't rely on Hillary Clinton to create jobs

The last meaningful job Hillary had was outsourced to Monica Lewinsky...
...and Monica blew it!

Monica Lewinsky walks into her dry cleaners

Monica Lewinsky walks into her dry cleaners, the guy is a little old and hard of hearing. Monica says "i need to get this dress cleaned, no starch, use the same hanger."
The dry cleaner responds "come again?"
Monica says "nope, this time it's mustard."

Why doesn't Monica Lewinsky like going to the doctor?

He always shoves a Bill down her t**...!

What's Bill Clintons favorite holiday?

According to Lewinsky...
Happy Employee Appreciation Day!

What do Monica Lewinsky and NFL players both have in common?

It's their knees that go first.

Wow Monica Lewinski is 50

They grow up so fast. It seems like it was just yesterday, she was crawling around the Oval Office putting everything in her mouth.

Monica Lewinsky says she WILL endorse Hillary for president...

..says Hillary Clinton "doesn't s**...."

CNN has just reported that Monika Lewinski will be helping with the Donald Trump for president campaign.

Apparently, the last time she endorsed a Clinton, it left a bad taste in her mouth.

What do Monica Lewinsky and an Asian political correspondent have in common?

All they talk about is the presidential e**...

Monica Lewinsky is voting for Donald Trump

Monica Lewinsky is voting for Donald Trump in the 2016 Presidential Election, because the last time a Clinton was in office, it left a bad taste in her mouth.

Did anyone else see that 60 Minutes interview with Monica Lewinsky last night?

She said she wasn't very happy about possibly having another Clinton in the White House. That the last one left a bad taste in her mouth.

THAT SMILE

A reporter asks Bill Clinton,. 'What did you find most attractive concerning Monica Lewinsky?"
He replied, 'She had the prettiest smile I ever came across."

What do Monica Lewinsky and the New York Giants have in common?

They were both terrorized by Clinton d**..., Ha Ha.

What did Bill Clinton say when asked about

What did Bill Clinton say when asked about Monica Lewinsky's best feature?
She has the whitest teeth I've ever came across.

What does Monica Lewinsky going to the oval office and you cashing your paycheck have in common?

In both cases somebody leaves with a hand full of Bills.

Hillary Clinton wants the President held accountable for his s**... abuses

Monica Lewinski said #metoo

Hillary Clinton found out that Bill was getting it on with Monica Lewinsky.

She shrugged her shoulders and said "Better her than me."

The question of Monica Lewinsky:

Did she blow a sitting U.S. president or blow him while standing?

Despite the fact she is a Democrat, Monica Lewinsky decided to vote for Trump in the last election...

....she said to her friend, "I'd like to vote for Hillary, but the last Clinton left a very foul taste in my mouth."

Why didn't Monica Lewinsky get a tax return in 1995?

Clinton was paying her under the table.

Why was it called the Lewinsky scandal ?

Because if they called it the Clinton scandal, people wouldn't know which on you were talking about.

Lewinsky joke, Why are people acting like Kamala Harris is the first woman to obtain such a high ranking position i