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Letter E Jokes

99 letter e jokes and hilarious letter e puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about letter e that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Letter E Short Jokes

Short letter e jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The letter e humour may include short letter j jokes also.

  1. My sister came up with this. What begins with a P, ends with an E and has a million letters in it post office
  2. Darth Vader: Luke, I know what you're getting for Christmas. Luke: How?
    Darth Vader: I felt your presents.
  3. if you added the letters S and E to the X files it would be the X-ES Files. haha excess files. way too many files lol
  4. Why was the letter E the only letter to get Christmas gifts? Because all the other letters were "not E"
  5. I am the beginning of eternity, the end of time and space, the beginning of every end, And the end of every place. What am I? The letter 'e'.
  6. I'm teaching my Grandson the alphabet at the moment, starting with the hardest first four letters.. ..the rest is just e-z
  7. Which letter in the alphabet is the best? The E, because all of the other letters are Not E (Naughty).
  8. It recently became apparent to me, that the letters 'T' and 'G' are far too close together on a keyboard.
    This is why I'll never be ending an e-mail with the phrase "Regards" ever again.
  9. The letter E is used frequently and infrequently.
  10. The hardest part about learning the alphabet is the first four letters; The rest is just E-Z.

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Letter E One Liners

Which letter e one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with letter e? I can suggest the ones about letter y and letter c.

  1. What start with "e," ends with "e," and contains one letter? An envelope.
  2. What word starts with "E" and ends in "E" but only has one letter in it? Envelope.
  3. What's long, hard and bendable and contains the letters p, e, n, i, s? Your spine
  4. What begins with E, ends with E, and has one letter? envelope
  5. The first four letters of the alphabet are the hardest. The rest are e-z.
  6. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? Envelope
  7. Why is E the nicest letter? Because all the others are naughty.
  8. What begins with a P, ends with an E and has a million letters in it? Post office
  9. Know why the letters a, e, i, o, and u are so angry? Irritable vowel syndrome.
  10. what begins with e and ends in e but only has one letter in it? an envelope
  11. The letters I, Z, R and E walked into a bar. The result was bizarre.
  12. Asked my Spanish friend if he liked any letters in the alphabet. "C," he said. "E, too."
  13. Nice ham you got there Be a shame if I add the letter s and the letter e
  14. I can spell something with more than 100 letters P-O-S-T O-F-F-I-C-E
  15. In English what letter comes after E? N

Letter E Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about letter e you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean letter b jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make letter e pranks.

Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it?
A: Envelope.

Q: What starts with a P, ends with an E, and has a 1,000 letters?
A: Post office.

Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it?
A: Envelope.

Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it?
A: Envelope.

Q: What starts with a P, ends with an E, and has a 1,000 letters?
A: Post office.

After numerous rounds of, "We don't know if o**... is still alive," o**... himself decided to send Ted Kennedy a letter in his own handwriting to let him know he was still in the game. Kennedy opened the letter which appeared to contain a single line of coded message, 370HSSV-0773H. Kennedy was baffled, so he e-mailed it to John Kerry. Kerry and his aides had no clue either, so they sent it to the FBI. Noone could solve it at the FBI, so it went to the CIA, then to the NSA. With no clue as to its meaning, the FBI finally asked Marine Corps Intelligence for help. Within a few seconds the Marine Corps cabled back with this reply, "Tell Kennedy he's holding the message upside down."

Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it?
A: Envelope.

After numerous rounds of, "We don't know if o**... is still alive," o**... himself decided to send Ted Kennedy a letter in his own handwriting to let him know he was still in the game.
Kennedy opened the letter which appeared to contain a single line of the coded message, 370HSSV-0773H.
Kennedy was baffled, so he e-mailed it to John Kerry.
Kerry and his aides had no clue either, so they sent it to the FBI.
Noone could solve it at the FBI, so it went to the CIA, then to the NSA.
With no clue as to its meaning, the FBI finally asked Marine Corps Intelligence for help.
Within a few seconds, the Marine Corps cabled back with this reply, "Tell Kennedy he's holding the message upside down."

Gurl, if I could rearrange the alphabet

I would make the first twelve letters be E,T,A,O,I,N,S,H,R,D,L and U. Those being the approximate order of the most frequently appearing letters in the English alphabet.

A musician joke

So little Johnny runs up to his mother and yells "Mommy! Mommy! I could count higher than anyone in my class at school today! Everyone else could only get to 10, but I could count all the way to 12!"
And little Johnny's mother replied, "That's because you are a violinist".
The next day, Little Johnny runs up to his mother and yells "Mommy! Mommy! I can read more letters in the alphabet then the rest of my class! Most of the children could read only up to 'E' but I got all the way up to 'G'!"
And little Johnny's mother replied "That's because you are a violinist."
The next day, little Johnny ran up to his mother and yelled "Mommy! Mommy! I'm the tallest in my class. Everyone got measured and I was the tallest out of all of them. Is it because I'm a violinist?"
And his mother looked him straight in the eye and said, "No honey, it isn't because you are a violinist. It's because you are 26."

Wrong Email

A Minnesota couple decided to vacation to Florida during the winter. They planned to stay at the very same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier. Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules. So, the husband left Minnesota and flew to Florida on Thursday. His wife would fly down the following day.
The husband checked into the hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife. However, he accidentally left out one letter in her e-mail address, and without realizing his error, he sent the e-mail.
Meanwhile.....somewhere in Houston, a widow had just returned home from her husband's f**.... He was a minister of many years who was called home to glory following a sudden heart attack. The widow decided to check her e-mail, expecting messages from relatives and friends. After reading the first message, she fainted.
The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:
To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I've Arrived
Date: 16 May 2003
I know you're surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now and you are allowed to send e-mails to your loved ones. I've just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then! Hope your journey is not as uneventful as mine was.
P.S. Sure is hot down here!

An Illinois man…

…left the snow-filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail.  
Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory. Unfortunately, he missed one letter and his note was directed instead to an elderly woman whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor in a dead faint. At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen:  
DEAREST WIFE,  
JUST GOT CHECKED IN. EVERYTHING PREPARED FOR YOUR ARRIVAL TOMORROW.  
YOUR LOVING HUSBAND 
P.S. SURE IS HOT DOWN HERE

Medical School Entrance Exam...

When I was young (100 yrs. Ago) and my intent was to go to medical school, the entrance exam included several questions that would determine eligibility.

One of the questions was "Rearrange the letters P N E S I to spell out an important part of the human body that is more useful when e**...."


Those who spelled "SPINE" became Doctors. The rest ended up in Congress.

Entrance Exam

A recent entrance exam for Medical School included several questions that would determine eligibility.
One of the questions was "Rearrange the letters P N E S I to spell out an important part of the human body that is more useful when e**...."
Those who spelled 'spine' became Doctors.
The rest ended up in Congress.

Practice makes perfect.

But only if you remove the A, the I, a C, add an F and an E and then rearrange the letters.

Why is the letter E lazy?

Because it's always in bed.

Another meeting of the letters.

All the letters: a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, i, j, k, l, m, n, o, p, q, r, s, u, v, w, x, y, and z were having a meeting when they realized a letter was missing. X says, "Is somebody missing?"
D replies, "Must be an absentee."

Mr. Steve Johnson, a businessman from Wisconsin, went on a business trip to Louisiana.

He immediately sent an e-mail back home to his wife, Jennifer. Unfortunately, he mistyped a letter, and the e-mail ended up going to a Mrs. Joan Johnson, the wife of a preacher who had just passed away. The preacher's wife took one look at the e-mail and promptly fainted.When she was finally revived, she nervously pointed to the message, which read: "Arrived safely, but it sure is hot down here."

"Where'd your 'P' go?"

So a preschooler was learning about the alphabet and all of its mysteriousness. So, teacher told the little gentleman to recite the letters of the alphabet. The boy begins to say the letters A, B, C, but abruptly stops. The teacher asks why he stopped, so the boy replies, "I have to go the bathroom". As her response she tells him he can go 'wee-wee' once he's finished reciting the alphabet. So, again, the boy starts to sing his abc's.
"A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, and Z"
The teacher responds, "Very good! But where'd your "P" go?"
*(dramatic line skip)*
The young boy blushes profusely and quietly whispers, "Down my left leg."

There is a group that works in secret and had an ultimate goal of lighting up the fifth letter of the alphabet.

While we don't know their true name, people have nicknamed them "The Illiminate E"

How many letters can you wear on your feet?

10 E's

Email Joke

It's wise to remember how easily this wonderful technology can be misused, sometimes unintentionally, with serious consequences.
Consider the case of the Illinois man who left the snow-filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quicke-mail. Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory.
Unfortunately, he missed one letter, and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher's wife, whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor in a dead faint.
At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen:
Dearest Wife,
Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.
PS. Sure is hot down here.

When I was in school I wrote a paper about how letter grades should be ABCDEF instead of ABCDF.

My teacher gave me an E+ on it.

What 11 letter word does every Yale graduate spell incorrectly?

I n c o r r e c t l y

Did you know there are only 24 letters in the NHS alphabet?

There's no A&E.

What 7-letter word has one n, one i, two g's, one e, one r, and one s?

Gingers!

A B C D E F G H I J...

10 letters

What's a nanny's favorite letter?

I don't know, but it's not E.

What letter never satisfies it's wife?

The quick E

What does 2 letter E's, a mole and a pit have to do with eachother

I don't know, but hole-e mole-e is that a combo

What do twin towers and the genders have in common?

The letters - e,n,r,s

Why is E the only good letter?

Because every other letter is not E!

What letters did not receive presents from Santa this year?

A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, U, V, W, X, Y and Z.
They've always been Not T.

Phil Collins is really fond of the 5th and 26th letters of the alphabet.

He's an E, Z lover.

Boy: there are 20 letters in the alphabet right? Girl: 26.

Boy: oh, I forgot U R A H O E.

A college student sends a letter to his folks back home

Dear Mom and Dad,

**$**chool i**$** really great. I am making lot**$** of friend**$** and **$**tudying very hard. My profe**$$**or**$** are al**$**o **$**uper cool! With all my **$**tuff, I **$**imply can't think of anything I need, **$**o if you would like, you can ju**$**t **$**end me a card, a**$** I would love to hear from you. Mi**$$** you guy**$**!
Love,
Your **$**on
- - - - - - -
Dear Son,
I k**NO**w that astro**NO**my, eco**NO**mics, and ocea**NO**graphy are e**NO**ugh to keep even an h**...**NO**r student busy. Do **NO**t forget that the pursuit of k**NO**wledge is a **NO**ble task, and you can never study e**NO**ugh.
Love,
Mom and Dad

What's long, hard, and has the letters p**... inside?

A spine.

When I was young I decided I wanted to attend medical school...

At the entrance exam, we were asked to rearrange the following alphabets:
 
P  N  E  I  S
 
The question asked us to rearrange the letters in a way that it would spell the most important part of the body that is most useful when straight.
 
Those who answered *SPINE* are doctors today, and the rest of them are my friends.

A man walks into a store that has a broken neon sign

A man walks into a store and says,"hey, you should fix your neon sign out front, the letter E is burnt out".
The storekeeper replies, "I can't replace the letter, it would ruin the joke!"
"What joke?" Asks the man.
"Stop me if you've heard it before," says the shopkeep, "because it's an old E, but it's a good E."

Why did the letter go into the restroom as an A but come out as an E?

Because it experienced Vowel Movement.

I was going to make a joke about the letters "F" and "E"...

...but it was too **ironic**.

What is the only good letter in Santa's book?

E.
They're all either not-e or nice.

Every robo-dog has a different letter amd number as its name...

But all Korean dogs are e-10

Why did only the letter E get Christmas presents?

Because the rest of them were not-E.

Using the letters P S N I E... name a part of the human body that works best when e**....

If you answered "SPINE" You are correct

The first letter in the English alphabet is E

Did you see the movie about how a letter of the alphabet went on an odyssey to find the meaning of life?

It was full of E-motion

What did the letter D say to the letter E?

That's what C said.

What did Ernest Vincent Wright say when he was challenged to write a book without the letter E?

"What a novel idea!"

What did the Dr. say to the letter E when discussing E's life?

You're a Mister E to me

What's the scariest letter to Pirates?

A mutant 'e'

E is the most commonly used letter.

I was shocked

I ate my son

E stole some of te letters of my keyboard. Suc an assole.

Put these letters together to form a word. P N E I S Clue: a body part that is very important when e**....

The answer is spine.

Bra Sazes

Have u ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and H are the letters used to define bra sizes but couldn't figure out what the letters stood for? Well its time you became informed!

(A) Almost b**....
(B) Barely there.
(C) Can't Complain!
(D) Dang!
(DD) Double Dang!
(E) Enormous!
(F) Fake.
(G) Get a Reduction.
(H) Help me, I've fallen and I can't get up!!!

In honour of my first cake day, here's a few of my favourite riddles. Feel free to try them on your friends.

Q: What gets bigger, the more you take away from it?
A: A hole
Q: What two words have thousands of letters in them?
A: Post office
Q: The maker doesn't want it, the buyer doesn't use it and the user doesn't see it. What is it?
A: A coffin
Q: What travels all over the world, but stays in the corner?
A: A stamp
Q: What runs all around a field, but doesn't move?
A: A fence
Q: What starts with E, ends with e and only has one letter in it?
A: Envelope

What extends flexibly from the hips, is 71 cm long in men, and has the letters P, E, N, I, and S?

A spine

Which important body part is most useful when e**... and is spelled with the letters p**...?

The spine.

How do you address the most suspicious letter of the alphabet?

Mister E...