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Lesbian Gay Jokes

56 lesbian gay jokes and hilarious lesbian gay puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about lesbian gay that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Lesbian Gay Short Jokes

Short lesbian gay jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The lesbian gay humour may include short gays jokes also.

  1. A lesbian, a gay man, a bisexual person, and a trans person are waiting in line It was an LGBT queue
  2. The Catholic Church absolutely agrees on homosexuals getting married... ... As long as a gay marries a lesbian.
  3. This gay rights thing has gone too far. Even my local cafe is selling a Bi, Lesbian and Transgender sandwich.
  4. A gay Republican impregnants a Lesbian Democrat at a crazy house party. They decide to share custody of the child. It was a bi-party-son agreement.
  5. What do you call a gay dinosaur? A megasoreass


    What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
    \-A lickalotapuss
  6. After a disaster only four people on earth were left alive, a lesbian, a gay, transgender and the straightest guy possible. They wish if only they could get bi somehow.
  7. I don't care if you're black, white, straight, bisexual, gay, lesbian, short, tall, fat, skinny, rich or poor... I still hate you.
  8. There was a gay man from Scoon Who took a lesbian up to his room,
    They sat on the bed,
    Then each of them said:
    "Now who does what and with which and to whom?"
  9. LG's making a phone targeted towards the gay and lesbian community It's the all new LG BTQ.
  10. Why are Gay and Lesbian parades always held in the Summer? Because Pride comes before a Fall.

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Lesbian Gay One Liners

Which lesbian gay one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with lesbian gay? I can suggest the ones about lesbian couple and bisexual.

  1. I miss when nobody was called lesbian, gay or transgender..
  2. What did one lesbian vampire say to the other? My pad or yours?
  3. What does LGBT stand for? Lesbian, Gay, Brazilian, Transgender
  4. The Gay life is not for everybody. Lesbian honest.
  5. What happens if a lesbian claims that they're gay?
  6. What do you call a lesbian who doesn't believe in gods? A gay-theist.
  7. Why don't gay guys go to lesbian bars? Because they can never find a place to sit.
  8. If g**... come out of the closet, where do l**... come from? The liquor cabinet
  9. Hear about the new drug for l**...? Trycocksagain.
  10. What do you call a gay female barbarian? A r**... lesbian.
  11. Why is it legal to be gay in l**...? Because they're all l**...
  12. Ur mom gay Ur mom gay
    No, Ur dad lesbian
    No Ur grandma t**....
  13. What's a l**... favorite movie? 50 Shades of Gay
  14. What do you call a large scale extermination of g**... and l**...? The Homocaust

Humorous Lesbian Gay Jokes to Bring Fun and Laughter to Your Life

What funny jokes about lesbian gay you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean heterosexual jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make lesbian gay pranks.

So a bunch of l**... are running in a race...

So a bunch of l**... are running in a race, and a bunch of gay guys are running in a race, Who's winning?
The l**...; they're all running lickity split, and the gay guys are poking behind.

Dinosaurs naming their non-hetero children.

What do you call a gay dinosaur?
Megasoreass.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lickalotopuss.

A lesbian couple and gay couple are racing for a cash prize. Who wins?

The l**..., 'cause the g**... are still packing and the l**... are lickity split.

Who wins in a race to San Francisco, the lesbian couple or the gay couple?

The l**.... They get there lickity split while the g**... are still packin it in!

Two l**... named Rachel walk in to a wedding cake shop...

To plan for their upcoming nuptials. After learning that the cake will be for their own wedding, the baker refuses service. Offended, the couple can't believe the guy is so opposed to gay marriage we won't even bake a cake. The baker replies, "No no I'm fine with gay marriage-- I just can't support inter-Rachel marriage."

What does a gay horse eat?

Heyyyy.
...
What does a lesbian horse eat?
hey.

Two l**... named Rachel walk in to a bakery...

To buy a cake for their upcoming wedding. After learning that the cake will be for their own wedding, the baker refuses service. Offended, the couple can't believe the guy is so opposed to gay marriage that he won't even bake a cake. The baker replies, "No no I'm fine with gay marriage-- I just can't support inter-Rachel marriage."

(posted before but I felt it was an appropriate time for it to rerun.)

Which E.D. is worst, Erectile Dysfunction or Explosive Diarrhea?

The man blushed and answered in almost a whisper: erectile dysfunction..
The embarassed woman also said: erectile dysfunction.
The butch lesbian hesitantly replied: erectile dysfunction.
The gay guy without hesitation answered: depends if you're top or bottom.

A gay couple and a lesbian couple

Both need to leave quickly.
Who gets out first?
The gay couple. Their s**...'s already packed.

What do gay horses eat?

Heyyyyyyyy
What do lesbian butch horses eat?
Hey (in manly voice)

A blind man walks into a gay bar.

He walks up to the lesbian bartender and says "hey you wanna hear a blonde joke?". The bartender says "Let me tell you a few things since you're blind, I am a blonde bartender who keeps a shotgun under the table. The bouncer is a 6ft blonde with a 4th degree black belt in judo. The woman beside you is a blonde biker with the local gang. The owner of this bar is a blonde army veteran who did four tours in Iraq. Now do you really want to tell that joke here?". The blind man thinks for a second and says "Naaahh, not if i have to explain it four times."

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus

g**... and l**... are nationalists and transgenders are immigrants.

Some stereotypes just aren't true, not all gay people are flamboyant and constantly happy

Some of them are l**...

A couple of secs

A little girl runs out to the backyard where her father is working, and asks him, "Daddy, what's s**...?"
"OK," he thinks, "this day was bound to come, and I'm not going to let my little princess learn about s**... from the streets."
So, he sits her down, and tells her all about the birds and the bees. He tells her about conception, i**..., puberty and m**....
Then she asks, "Daddy, what is 'A Couple'?"
And he carries on, "A couple is two people like your mom and me." And he goes on to describe gay, lesbianism, etc...
The father finally asks, "So why did you want to know about 'a couple' and s**...'?"
"Oh, mummy said lunch would be ready in a couple of secs..." the girl replies.

Its long thought that all gay people come out of the closet, but its only the men...

l**... come out of the Marines.

The Gay Ones

Daughter : dad i'm a lesbian
Dad:ohh okayy.....
2nd daughter: i'm a lesbian
Dad: w**...!!!!does any one in this family like MEN
Son: me...

Two lady l**..., both called Rachel, tried to buy a cake for their upcoming wedding. However, the baker refused to serve 'their kind'...

Not surprisingly, the two girls were hugely offended and asked him why he had a problem with gay nuptials.
The baker replied that he had no problems at all, however, he wasn't a supporter inter-Rachel marriage.

I was in line at a busy bank...

I was in line at the bank and it was very busy so I had to wait awhile. At the front was a lesbian couple setting up a 529 plan for their new daughter's education. Behind them was a gay man waitinf to refinance his car. A bisexual couple was behind the gay guy talking about a home equity loan. Behind them was a trans person looking for HSA advice for upcoming treatment. I just had to wait behind the LGBT queue.

If Tindr is for straight people and grindr is for gay men, what is the dating app for l**...?

Scissr