Leonardo Dicaprio Jokes
83 leonardo dicaprio jokes and hilarious leonardo dicaprio puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about leonardo dicaprio that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Leonardo Dicaprio Short Jokes
Short leonardo dicaprio jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The leonardo dicaprio humour may include short george clooney jokes also.
- The movie titanic turns 25 later this year. In related news, Leonardo DiCaprio said he is no longer interested in seeing it.
- Bartender: this scotch is my favorite, it's aged twenty fi---- Leonardo DiCaprio: [spits it out]
- What's the difference between Leonardo Dicaprio and Sesame Street? Sesame Street has an Oscar.
- What's the difference between a South African prison and Leonardo Dicaprio? A South African prison has an Oscar
- When I'm feeling down. I just remind myself that I've won just as many Oscars as Leonardo Dicaprio
- What does Leonardo DiCaprio call a woman 10 years younger than him? Mother-in-law material.
- Why doesn't Leonardo DiCaprio like jokes about the movie "Titanic"? They're all more than 25 years old.
- When I first meet someone I always want to talk about that movie with Kate Winslet and Leonardo DiCaprio... but the Titanic is a terrible ice breaker.
- It makes sense that Leonardo DiCaprio cares so much about climate change… He just wants a world his future girlfriends can turn 18 in.
- A Swedish bartender is found to be the spitting image of Leonardo DiCaprio As it turns out, they have the same amount of Oscars, too.
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Leonardo Dicaprio One Liners
Which leonardo dicaprio one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with leonardo dicaprio? I can suggest the ones about romeo and heath ledger.
- What do all these Leonardo DiCaprio jokes have in common? They're all so childish..
- Who's Leonardo Dicaprio's least favorite Sesame Street character? Oscar
im so sorry - Leonardo DiCaprio: "Hold my beer." Leo's girlfriend: "But I'll get arrested."
- Why did Leonardo DiCaprio visit Sesame Street? It was his only chance to see an Oscar
- What's 18 inches long and never gets used? Leonardo DiCaprio's acceptance speech.
- What do a common garbage can and Leonardo DiCaprio have in common? No Oscar!
- Why does Leonardo DiCaprio like Covid? 19 and easy to spread
- What's Leonardo DiCaprio's least favorite kind of wine? Aged.
- What does Leonardo DiCaprio call a 19 year old? A long term relationship.
- Why doesn't Leonardo DiCaprio have a PlayStation 2? It's too old for him.
- What do you call Leonardo DiCaprio and his fiance on their wedding day? Bride and Groomer
- What's pretty and expensive but has no use? Leonardo DiCaprio's Oscar shelf.
- I want to be like Leonardo DiCaprio from Inception. He has a dream job.
- What did Leonardo DiCaprio name his son? Leonardo DiCapriSun
- What did the helicopter propeller say to Leonardo DiCaprio? "I'm not a real big fan."
Leonardo Dicaprio Oscar Jokes
Here is a list of funny leonardo dicaprio oscar jokes and even better leonardo dicaprio oscar puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- There should be a fictional biopic about Leonardo DiCaprio's fight for his oscar. But I guess whoever plays him will win an Oscar for it.
- I keep trying to explain a joke to Leonardo DiCaprio about the Oscars... but he never get it.
- First Thing Leonardo DiCaprio Did When He Got Home From Oscars Was... Check the spinning top.
- Leonardo Dicaprio must be sad. He only has one Oscar instead of many.
- Oscars night, Leonardo DiCaprio walks to the stage... Steve Harvey follows suit...
- What's the similarity between a spanish prison and Leonardo DiCaprio? Now, both have an oscar.
- Leonardo DiCaprio winning an Oscar! oh wait.
- ELI5: Why hasn't Leonardo DiCaprio won an Oscar yet?
- Sometimes i feel like girls are like oscars And im leonardo dicaprio :(
- My girlfriend... .. is like Leonardo DiCaprio's Oscar.
Giggle-Inducing Leonardo Dicaprio Jokes for Joyful Times with Friends
What funny jokes about leonardo dicaprio you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean angelina jolie jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make leonardo dicaprio pranks.
Leonardo DiCaprio had to ask permission from Chuck Norris to say the famous line "I'm the king of the world."
Leonardo DiCaprio only starred in Inception because if he didn't, Chuck Norris will enter his dream and roundhouse kick him into limbo.
George Clooney, Leonardo Dicaprio and Matthew Mcconaughey got together to make a movie...
George Clooney said, "I'll direct."
Dicaprio said, "I'll produce."
And Matthew McConaughey said, "I'll write, I'll write, I'll write."
A man approached me on the train...
...and said "Remember Leonardo DiCaprio," and then ran away.
Later when I was grocery shopping, the same man came over to me and said "Remember Leonardo DiCaprio," and then ran away.
Then at night, when I was at a bar, the man came, said "Remember Leonardo diCaprio," and ran away.
When I had gone to bed and was trying to fall asleep, he entered my room, said "Remember Leonardo DiCaprio," and ran away.
At that point I had gotten tired of him so I called the police. They asked if I could tell them anything about him. "I do not know his name," I told them, "but he reminds me of Leonardo DiCaprio."
What is an ear of corn's favourite Leonardo DiCaprio movie?
Inception
What movie did Leonardo DiCaprio's dog recently star in?
The Woof of Wall Street.
If Leonardo DiCaprio played a police officer in a movie, what would his name be?
Leonardo DiCoprio
What character will Leonardo DiCaprio play in the reboot of the Departed?
Billy Cast-again
Who is the easiest actor in Hollywood to rob?
Leonardo Dicaprio
What did Leonardo DiCaprio say when he planted a seed?
Inception
Leonardo DiCaprio, Ellen Page set to star in a sci-fi adaptation of Colin Kaepernick's career.
*Interception*
Leo's First Oscar
Leonardo DiCaprio in the delivery room.
Leo: "What is it doc?!"
Doctor: "It's a bo-"
Leo: "NO! NO! LIKE WE REHEARSED!"
*Doctor sighs, handing the baby boy to Leo*
Doctor: "And the "Oscar" goes to Leonardo DiCaprio for the role of Father in Conception.
Leonardo DiCaprio slept in animal carcass in the name of acting...
That's nothing. I slept with a carcass for 3 years before my divorce.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Revenant: How do you call a scalped Leonardo DiCaprio?
Leonardo DiCabrio
What do Leonardo DiCaprio & anyone who buys a Powerball ticket have in common?
Their odds of winning are the same
The Irishman was amazing.
Long, but amazing. It wasn’t the only epic movie. Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, nearly three hours long. Leonardo DiCaprio attended the premiere, and by the end, his date was too old for him. Even Prince Andrew’s like, “Come on, Leo, mate. You’re nearly 50, son.”
Who ships Kate Winslet and Leonardo DiCaprio the most?
Not Titanic
I used to Remember Leonardo DiCaprio When I was feeling down.
Unfortunately I still remember him.
What's Leonardo Dicaprio's least favorite dessert?
Bear claaaaaarrrrrwwwwwwss!!!
Some actors were planning to make a movie on famous composers
Arnold Schwarzenegger, Leonardo DiCaprio and Tom Hanks were all making a movie about famous composers. Leo said, "I'd like to play Beethoven." Tom said, "I'd like to play Mozart." Arnie said "I'll be Bach"
George Clooney, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Mathew McConaughey are in a coffee shop to discuss a new movie:
Clooney: I'll direct.
DiCaprio: I'll act.
McConaughey: I'll write, I'll write, I'll write.
*announcing academy award* it's not Leonardo DiCaprio:
It's Digiourno
How did your interview go yesterday?
\- Well, I entered the office and found the interviewer sitting on a large black leather chair. He pointed towards his laptop, asked me to go outside with it and then come back and try to sell it. He thought himself as Leonardo DiCaprio from the Wolf of Wall Street.
\- So what did you do?
\- Well, obviously I obliged. I took the laptop and left the room.
\- Then what?
\- Nothing. 30 minutes later he called me up. Begging me to return it cause all his important documents were in it. So I asked him: will you buy it?
Matthew McConaughey, Leonardo DiCaprio and Brad Pitt decide to make a movie together.
Of course, they are going to need roles for each other, but none of them can decide what they want to do. They argue over this for hours, until Leonardo finally decides he wants to direct, since he is the best with cameras. Eventually, Brad Pitt decides he wants to produce, since he's the one with the most money. Now there's only one left; McConaughey. DiCaprio turns to him and says,
Well what does that leave you with?
Matthew thinks about this for a while, until he finally turns to the two of them.
I'll write, I'll write, I'll write.
