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Lennon Jokes

70 lennon jokes and hilarious lennon puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about lennon that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Lennon Short Jokes

Short lennon jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The lennon humour may include short john lennon jokes also.

  1. Wouldn't it have been amazing if John Lennon had invented that device that you put in your front door to secretly see who's on the other side... I mean, imagine all the peepholes.
  2. John F Kennedy, Indira Gandhi, John Lennon... History shows if you don't want your child assassinated, don't name them after an airport.
  3. Scientists are cloning John Lennon.. What if it all goes wrong and they clone millions of John Lennons?
    Imagine all the people..
  4. I heard that beans were John Lennon's favourite vegetable.... .....up until he decided to give peas a chance.
  5. What did John Lennon's mother say to get him to eat his vegetables? "Come on John, give peas a chance."
  6. How did John Lennon convince his son to eat his vegetables? He told him to give peas a chance.
  7. Just started my own business selling John Lennon memorabilia on Ebay... Imagine all the PayPal.
  8. I founded John Lennon Television, and now we're the second biggest subscription TV service in the UK. Above us, only Sky.
  9. Kennedy, Lennon, Gandhi If you don't want you kids assassinated, don't name them after an airport.
  10. Did you hear that they exhumed the body of John Lennon? All they found was a dead beetle...

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Lennon One Liners

Which lennon one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with lennon? I can suggest the ones about songs and saint.

  1. I've decided to sell all my John Lennon memorabilia on eBay Imagine all the PayPal!
  2. All flights from John Lennon Airport are cancelled. Imagine all the people.
  3. Put all my John Lennon memorabilia on Ebay Imagine all the paypal
  4. I just sold all my John Lennon memorabilia on eBay Imagine all the PayPal
  5. All flights to John Lennon Airport have been cancelled Imagine all the people...
  6. "Love me do" was written by John Lennon... After he got a really nice haircut
  7. Lucy, In the Sky, With Diamonds John Lennon, proving he was a terrible Clue player
  8. Why did John Lennon become a vegetarian? He wanted to give peas a chance.
  9. I'm selling all of my John Lennon collection on EBay Imagine all the pay pal
  10. What did John Lennon say when he got egg shells in his cake? Yolko Oh-no
  11. Where are all the old Beatles records stored? The Lennon closet.
  12. What was John Lennons final hit? The pavement
  13. What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.
  14. What is John Lennon's favourite donut? Strawberry Filled forever!
  15. Yo mama so old She knew John Lennon before he had long hair!

John Lennon Jokes

Here is a list of funny john lennon jokes and even better john lennon puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • How does John Lennon get his kids to eat their vegetables? He tells them to "Give Peas a Chance"
  • What did John Lennons parents say to him to get him to eat his veggies when he was a kid? All we are saying is, give peas a chance
  • How does John Lennon practice playing in front of large crowds? He imagines all the people.
  • The assassination of John Lennon is one of the biggest tragedies in music Not even one of the five bullets hit Yoko Ono
  • What did John Lennon say when he first arrived at the Door section of Home Depot. Imagine all the peep holes.
  • Why was John Lennon shocked when he got his wife's gynecologist bill? He had misunderstood the doctor when he said "I do probe Ono."
  • What was John Lennon's favorite fruit & place to eat it? A wee olive in a yellow submarine.
  • The 1960s started with beetle mania The 2020s have started with bat fever... Well I'm hoping Covid-19 is just a one-hit wonder, you know, like Come on Eileen or John Lennon's first wife
  • John Lennon is asked for tips on opening crates: "It's easy if you pry."
  • How did John Lennon like his Pop-Tarts? Strawberry Filled Forever

Lennon Yoko Jokes

Here is a list of funny lennon yoko jokes and even better lennon yoko puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Why Did John Lennon Get shot? Yoko Ducked
  • What's John Lennon's favorite card game? Yoko Uno
  • Did you know that John Lennon beat his wife? Yoko? Oh, no...
  • Why did John Lennon get shot? because Mark Chapman was a terrible shot, and kept missing Yoko.
  • Have you ever heard Yoko Ono sing? Lennon really dodged a bullet with that one.
  • After Yoko Ono told John Lennon she loves him 8 days a week, Lennon wrote the song "Help!".
Lennon joke

Lennon joke

Entertaining Lennon Jokes to Laugh Out Loud Fun with Everyone

What funny jokes about lennon you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean wrench jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make lennon pranks.

What do Kodak film and John Lennon have in common?

They both came in a yellow box

I'm going to sell John Lennon memorabilia online.

Imagine all the PayPal.

h**..., John Paul II, and Lennon walk into a bar.

h**..., John Paul II, and Lennon walk into a bar.
Lennon says to the bartender, "give me your best shot."
The bartender pours Lennon a shot, and it's dead-on perfect.
John Paul says, "Give me your best shot."
The bartender pours him a shot, and it was decent, but a bit off
h**... says, "Give me your best shot."
The bartender is about to pour it when h**... stops him and says,
"Actually, I'll do it myself."

I've finally taken the time to list my collection of John Lennon memorabilia on eBay.

Imagine all the PayPal.

Been selling random stuff on Ebay recently.

I'm now torn about whether or not to sell off my beloved complete John Lennon collection. They'll be hard to part with, but imagine all the Paypal.

"Lucy, in the sky, with diamonds"

John Lennon - World's Worst Cluedo Player.

What's British and comes in a Japanese box?

John Lennon

John Lennon invented that device in your front door to secretly see who's on the other side.

Why does Liverpool have an airport named after John Lennon?

Because it's the first place he went once he got some money

Where does John Lennon buy his groceries from?

Nowhere anymore

Lennon joke, How did John Lennon convince his son to eat his vegetables?

jokes about lennon