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Left Wing Jokes

42 left wing jokes and hilarious left wing puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about left wing that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Left Wing Short Jokes

Short left wing jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The left wing humour may include short right wing jokes also.

  1. What's the difference between the USA and a bird? On a bird, the left wing and the right wing work together to benefit the whole bird.
  2. American politics is like a penguin. It has both a left wing and a right wing. But are only good for flapping and making noises.
  3. (Politics) Why would it be unsafe to board a plane with Ben Shapiro? He'd destroy the Left Wing.
  4. I guess politicians are just a bunch of chickens. Ya got the right wing and the left wing.
  5. If I were ever to win the lottery, first thing I'd do is hire someone to clean my kids room... and then buy some chicken wings with the $20 I have left over.
  6. The cable news networks tend to cater to different groups Fox News is for right wings, MSNBC is for left wings, and CNN is for plane wings.
  7. Why do late night comedians skew left wing? Because the right wing viewers have to work in the morning.
  8. My right-wing sister accused me of getting indoctrinated by my college professors for my left-wing ideologies. I tell her "You're just jealous because I actually *finished* college."
  9. Why did the mad scientist stitch the three left-wing politicians together? He was trying to make a right-wing one.
  10. Why did Bernie Sanders's chicken restaurant throw out so much food? He only sold left wings.

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Left Wing One Liners

Which left wing one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with left wing? I can suggest the ones about left leaning and lefty.

  1. I would never get on a plane with Ben Shapiro He would try to destroy the left wing.
  2. Why did Ben Shapiro destroy a kfc restaurant? 'Cause they served him left wings.
  3. Never take a plane with Ben Shapiro He will destroy the left wing
  4. Did yo hear about the Hillary special at KFC? Two fat thighs and a left wing for $2.99
  5. What would Ben shapiro do if he had to stop 911? He would destroy the left wing.
  6. Why can't Ben Shapiro fly an airplane? He always destroys the left wing.
  7. What do you call left-wing felines? Democats.
  8. Ben Shapiro dies in a plane c**.... Wanna know why it crashes? LEFT WING DESTROYED
  9. Fox News has determined the cause of the recent plane c**.... It was the left wing.
  10. I hate left-wing Neo-n**..., They are *liberally* h**....
  11. KFC releases Obama bucket of chicken Its full of left wings and chicken a**...'

Experience Instant Grins & Giggles with Playful Left Wing Jokes

What funny jokes about left wing you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean left field jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make left wing pranks.

"We're going to be together for the rest of our lives!" smiled my wife as we flew on our dream vacation to Hawaii...

"You seem pretty sure of yourself." I replied.
"I am!" she said, gazing out the window. "The left wing's fallen off and the engine's on fire."

A plane was once flying over an island..

A plane was once flying over an island when the passengers heard the pilot's voice:
Ladies & Gentlemen, if you look on the right side of the plane, you'll see an engine on fire. If you look on the left side, you'll see a wing on fire. And if you look down, you'll see me and my co-pilot in parachutes, waving at you. This is a recording.

Left wing or Right wing, it doesn't really matter.

If either is harmed the plane will c**....

An offensive joke

A quarterback, a running back, a fullback, a wide receiver, a tight end, a left tackle, a left guard, a center, a right tackle, a right guard, a striker, an attacking midfielder, a left wing skater, a center, a right wing skater, a point guard, a shooting guard, a small forward and a designated hitter all walk into a bar

The problem with voting based on your beliefs rather than your situation in life

Left wing girls won't date me because they don't like my views
Right wing girls won't date me because I don't have a job
Wait, I just checked with the left wing girls
They said they wouldn't date a guy with no job either

An English WW2 pilot was...

...talking in the school about his war experience.
"So I'm flying over German land in my plane. I was alone. Out of the blue, a fokker flanks me on the right. Then, I found a fokker on my left wing too. I was panicking, when suddenly 2 more fokkers appeared and surrounded me..."
By now, the children are giggling, so an embaressed teacher intervenes, "Actually, fokker is the name of a German airplane."
"Yeah", interjected the pilot, "But these fokkers were flying in Dorniers."

Since you liked the first one...more Russian jokes. (Airplane Intercom Version)

"Good afternoon passengers. We are currently flying at 20000 feet. If you take a look out of the windows on the left-hand side you will get a good view of our left engine on fire. If you look out the right-hand side windows you will see our right wing has fallen off. Below the airplane you will soon see 5 parachutes. Our crew thanks you for flying Aeroflot. We wish you a pleasant journey to wherever your final destination may be."

Stalin calls a meeting in the Politburo

To hold a debate on wether there will be money in the Soviet Union. The two main factions, led by Trotsky and Bukharin, represent left- and right-wing views. Trotsky said, "We should absolutely abolish money, the state should be able to provide all of its citizens." Bukharin rises to speak, saying, "We must have money, as we shouldn't run social experiments." In his synthetic, dialectical wisdom, Stalin says, "There will be and won't be money." Everyone turns to look at him, quizzically. Someone finally speaks up, "How is this possible, comrade?" "Some people will have money, and others won't.

The miser's will

A notorious miser died, and in his will he left his $3 million estate split evenly among his three sons: a doctor, a priest, and a lawyer. Being selfish even in death, he left each of them strict instructions to put the money in his coffin when they buried him.
After the f**..., the three were talking, and the doctor said "I have a confession to make. I didn't actually put all the money in the coffin -- it seemed like such a waste. I kept out $200,000 to buy some new equipment for the hospital."
The priest chimed in, "I'm so glad you said that -- I couldn't bring myself to throw away $1 million either. I kept $300,000 to build a new wing on the church."
The lawyer shook his head in disgust and said, "I can't believe you two, ignoring your dead father's wishes like that! When we buried him, that coffin contained my personal check for the full amount of one million dollars!"

The Parrot and the Priest

Once there was a priest who owned a Parrot. The priest was about to order gravel for his new driveway and complained loudly about how he didn't have time to order the 15 truckloads that he needed. He left for the church and forgot to lock the parrots cage and the parrot who wanted to help and impress his owner decided to call the gravel company and ordered 50 truckloads of gravel. Later the same week the priest gets home and his driveway is completely covered with gravel so he storms in and asks the parrot "Did you order 50 truckloads of gravel?" the parrot being the wise parrot that he was realized he was in trouble and denied it.
The priest brought in a hammer and some nails, nailed one of the parrots wings to the wall and asked again if he ordered gravel. The parrot continues to deny the charges and soon enough he is entirely nailed to the wall. The priest leaves furiously to try and fix the mess. The parrot looks to his right and sees Jesus hanging there on his own cross and says "Did you also order gravel?"

jokes about left wing