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Lead Investigator Jokes

12 lead investigator jokes and hilarious lead investigator puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about lead investigator that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Lead Investigator Short Jokes

Short lead investigator jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The lead investigator humour may include short investigator jokes also.

  1. Why did it took so long to investigate Flint water crisis? They never appointed a lead detective
  2. Doggy Sherlock Holmes was investigating a case... Doggy Sherlock: Any leads?
    Doggy Watson: Yes, Holmes. Two.
    Doggy Sherlock: Excellent, lets take them and go walkies.
  3. Police are investigating who stole the Thanksgiving turkey... Right now there is no leads... But they suspect FOWL Play..

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Hilarious Lead Investigator Jokes to Make Your Friends Roar with Laughter

What funny jokes about lead investigator you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean inspector jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make lead investigator pranks.

A grape is kidnapped and dies of dehydration

At the f**..., the wife of the grape asks if the policegrape has any leads, to which he responds.
"I'm sorry Ma'am, I can't comment on currant investigations"

A man is murdered in a dessert factory.

The defendant is clearly guilty, but the investigators struggle to find the m**... weapon to properly incriminate him. Where could it possibly have been hidden? The lead investigator is at a loss, when one day he suddenly jumps from his desk as it comes to him.
The proof is in the pudding!

So there was a m**... the other day...

A man by the name of Juan Gonzalez was killed, and there was almost no evidence left behind.
The local police called in the FBI because they couldn't find a single lead.
The FBI investigator comes to the crime scene and has the case solved almost immediately.
He was killed with a golf gun, he said.
Everyone looked around confused, because no one had ever heard of a golf gun.
He said, isn't it obvious? There's a hole in Juan!

The body of an homosexual, existentialist fugitive was found in a motel 2 years after the case went cold.

Across an entire wall the words "How do they know" were scrawled, surrounded by places and names connected by bits of string.
The police investigated this, but they couldn't decipher it beyond the ravings of a madman.
The body was found in front of a computer after people at the motel reported a gunshot early in the morning.
Apparently he had browsing 4chan. The police tried to figure out what drove him to kill himself by checking his browser history, but couldn't get any leads. It wasn't until they looked at the comments that they figured out what drove him mad.

The CIA the FBI and the KGB hold a competition

The KGB, the FBI and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at catching criminals. The Secretary General of the UN decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it. The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that the rabbit does not exist. The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and make no apologies: the rabbit had it coming. The KGB goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling: Okay! Okay! I'm a rabbit! I'm a rabbit!

The KGB, the FBI and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at catching criminals

The Secretary General of the UN decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it.
The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist.
The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming.
The KGB goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is screaming: "Okay! Okay! I'm a rabbit! I'm a rabbit!"

(My favorite joke)Who is best at apprehending criminals?

The CIA, the FBI, and the Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD) are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it.
The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations, they conclude that rabbits do not exist.
The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming.
The LAPD goes in. They come out two hours later dragging a badly beaten bear. The bear is screaming, "Okay, okay! I'm a RABBIT!! I'm a RABBIT!!"

The NYPD, The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals.

The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it.
The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist.
The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming.
The NYPD goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling: "Okay! Okay! I'm a rabbit! I'm a rabbit!'

Cops

The LAPD, the FBI, & the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it.
The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist.
The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming.
The LAPD goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten black bear. The bear is yelling: "Okay, okay, I'm a rabbit, I'm a rabbit."