Lazy Eye Jokes
50 lazy eye jokes and hilarious lazy eye puns to laugh out loud. Read human body jokes about lazy eye that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Lazy eye jokes are a dime a dozen, but they're still funny! Check out our roundup of the best lazy eye jokes to make you laugh.
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Funniest Lazy Eye Short Jokes
Short lazy eye jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The lazy eye humour may include short lazy people jokes also.
- I dated a girl with a lazy eye once. Turns out she was seeing someone else the whole time.
- I used to date a girl with a lazy eye. I had to break up with her. She was seeing somebody on the side.
- The scientific term for lazy eye is atchaphoria. One eye is looking atcha and the other is looking phoria.
- My gf told me I should not say anything about her friend's right lazy eye When I met her friend I complimented her on how athletic her left eye was
- Why should you never date someone with a lazy-eye? Because you never know if they're seeing someone else.
- My girlfriend recently developed a lazy eye. I think she started seeing people on the side.
- I had a crush on a girl with a lazy eye..... We never hooked up, she was always seeing someone else.
- I recently dated a girl with a lazy eye. Had to dump her after a week though, I'm pretty sure she was seeing somebody on the side.
- I'm ginger, my birthday is on April fools day, I was born during a thunder storm, and I have a lazy eye... If anything, my life is a joke..
- I'm so lazy. I'm so lazy my mom gets onto me about sleeping all the time, she once asked me "Is sleeping all you're good at?"
I said "Yea, I could do it with my eyes closed."
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Lazy Eye One Liners
Which lazy eye one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with lazy eye? I can suggest the ones about lazy and laziness.
- Why was the lazy-eyed man a horrible teacher? Because he couldn't control his pupils.
- I just spoke to my lazy eye surgeon. I wish he was more energetic.
- I was born with a lazy eye... ...and it spread to the rest of my body.
- My teacher My teacher had a lazy eye, she couldn't control her pupils.
- What do you call someone with a lazy eye and a clef pallet? Names
- I went on a date with a girl who had a lazy eye She wouldn't even look at me
- I have a hair lip, a big belly, and a lazy eye. What am I? Ugly.
- I have a crush on a girl with a lazy eye But she won't even look at me..
- People with amblyopia don't have a lazy eye... they have an eye with ADHD.
- What do you call a fat kid with 3 teeth and a lazy eye? Names.
- I dumped my boyfriend with a lazy eye. Turns out he was seeing chicks on the side.
- A friend of mine told me a lazy eye can be s**... but then she started looking at me funny.
- What does a Vietnam veteran with a lazy eye have? A 2000 yard stare.
Fun-Filled Lazy Eye Jokes to Make You and Your Friends Chuckle & Giggle
What funny jokes about lazy eye you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean private eye jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make lazy eye pranks.
I saw a lazy-eyed person today, and to my shame I couldn't help but stare. I'm not sure if she noticed
but maybe one eye did.
My wife is kind of lazy
We were watching an item on the news yesterday, about a wheelchair-bound quadriplegic who could play the (specially adapted) flute beautifully.
"Oh my god." She said, tears welling in her eyes, "I'd love to be able to do that."
"What, play the flute?" I asked.
"No, sit down all day."
There was a convention for lazy-eyed bachelors and bachelorettes. There was a massive turn out: Most of them ended with a perfect mate....
You could say that their eyes crossed in a crowded room.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I have a really bad temper.
I once punched a man with a lazy eye just for looking at me wrong.
A woman with a lazy eye was having an affair..
They said she was seeing someone on the side.
A man is walking down a hallway when he accidentally bumps into a woman with a lazy eye...
"Hey! Why don't you watch where you're going!" She exclaims. The man replies, "Why don't you go where you're watching?"
A guy with a lazy eye is sitting at a bar...
drinking his sorrows away. The bartender notices the man is upset and asks, "What's wrong buddy?"
The guy says, "Well my wife left me, she thought I was seeing someone on the side."
People ask me if it's difficult dating a girl with a lazy eye
Not really I say, I just look past it.
Never go out with someone with lazy eye.
They'll always be seeing someone else on the side.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I was born without eyelids, so they created them from my f**......
Now I'm a little c**...-eyed.
My dad has a lazy eye and tells this joke when someone asks about it.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Hear about the teacher with two lazy eyes?
Didn't last more then a day, couldn't control his pupils.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Husband: Do you love me?
Wife: Of course i love you, light of my life.
Husband: Would you love me even if i wronged you?
Wife: I will always love you, my darling.
Husband: But would you love me if i gambled away all our savings?
Wife: i would still love you, my precious husband.
Husband: what if i cheated on you, would you still love me?
Wife: of course. I will always love you, apple of my eye.
Husband: Ok. I forgot to turn on the dishwasher last night.
Wife: I HATE YOU, YOU LAZY, SELFISH IRRESPONSIBLE m**...!!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why can't your trust dating a person with a lazy eye ?
Cuz you'd always have to worry they would be seeing someone on the side.
Asked my eye doctor if he had my test results. He said there's good news & bad news.
He said, The good news is we've discovered why you've been so lethargic & slovenly lately…The bad news is we've discovered your lazy eye has spread to the rest of your body.
