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Law Enforcement Jokes

25 law enforcement jokes and hilarious law enforcement puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about law enforcement that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Law Enforcement Short Jokes

Short law enforcement jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The law enforcement humour may include short enforcement jokes also.

  1. What do you call a law enforcement agency that refuses to buy it's own vehicles? The Pro-lease department
  2. A criminal defense lawyer says "Don't talk" to his clients regarding interactions with law enforcement, except to his deaf-mute clients, to whom he says "Don't sign anything."
  3. How is your wife like law enforcement? She will never ask you a question she doesn't already know the answer to.
  4. What do you call a financially unstable law enforcement officer that writes dark poetry and literature? A po popo Poe
  5. Why do people who say, "I'm moving out of the USA if ___________ doesn't win!", never actually leave? Because other countries actually enforce their immigration laws.
  6. If i could change my DNA to be better in law enforcement ... It could lead to serious genetic cop-sequences.
  7. My first stand-up performance was for a law-enforcement fraternity. It didn't go so well... ... in fact, they wanted to charge me with "Attempted Manslaughter".
  8. A friend of mine in law enforcement doesn't like The Clash. I guess you could say that sheriff don't like it.

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Law Enforcement One Liners

Which law enforcement one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with law enforcement? I can suggest the ones about police department and armed police.

  1. What is a cats way of keeping law and order? Claw enforcement!
  2. What are law enforcement officers called in Vatican City? The Pope Po
  3. Who's the law enforcement in the font world? Sans Sheriff
  4. Homeless & unemployed cyborg law enforcer Hobocop
  5. What do you call the religious leader of law enforcement? the popope.
  6. Law of Gravity doesn't apply to Chuck Norris, he enforces it... with a round house kick.

Comical Puns & Laughs: Enjoy Fun, Witty Law Enforcement Jokes with Friends.

What funny jokes about law enforcement you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean police officer jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make law enforcement pranks.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

I'm planning on starting a s**... club....

... in Poland. It will be called Pole Land.
I will hire people from ex law enforcement as strippers.
The slogan for the club will be: "Welcome to Pole Land, in Poland: Where Polish police polish your pole".
The slogan did pretty well in market research polls.

Bubba n' Buford IV

Law enforcement officers in east Texas must also be linguists on occasion just to communicate. Take the time Bubba n' Buford were pulled over outside of Madisonville and the officer walked up and simply said "You boys have any ID?". Now that would seem a simple, clearly understood request...but not in east Texas. Buford with a puzzled look on his face responded "ID 'bout what?"

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

In the US, law enforcement is like Clorox 2...

safe for w**..., but really made for colors.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

How do you tell the difference between a gay man and someone in law enforcement?

How they pronounce CATCHTHESEMEN

Law Enforcement

Back in the 80's the government wanted to have a competition to see which branch of law enforcement was most effective. They released 3 rabbits into 3 separate forests and asked the FBI, the CIA, and the LAPD to go find the rabbits. The FBI, after questioning the plants and minerals, determine rabbits do not exist. The CIA burn down the whole forest and say they have no regrets. And finally the LAPD, after 2 weeks, come out with a beaten and bruised bear screaming "I'm a rabbit, I'm a rabbit!"