Laundry Machine Jokes

18 laundry machine jokes and hilarious laundry machine puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about laundry machine that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Laundry Machine Short Jokes

Short laundry machine jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The laundry machine humour may include short washing machine jokes also.

  1. What's the difference between a woman and a laundry machine? When I dump a load in the washing machine it doesn't follow me around after
  2. What's the difference between a laundry machine and a girl? The washing machine doesn't get upset if I dump a load in it and never call back
  3. What's the difference between a laundry machine and children? A laundry machine doesn't cry when I put the load in.
  4. My dishwasher and laundry machine broke today. We had to rush her to the hospital immediately.
  5. What does your grandma and a washing machine have in common? When I drop my load in them they both do my laundry after.
  6. It was hard work, but I finally fixed the laundry machine The wife beater is nice and clean again :)
  7. The cops in my town are looking for a crazy man. He was last seen having s**... with a laundry machine. Nut screws washer and bolts.
  8. What's the difference between w**... and b**...? They require different laundry machine settings.

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Laundry Machine One Liners

Which laundry machine one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with laundry machine? I can suggest the ones about laundry room and laundromat.

  1. What's a laundry machine's favourite chocolate? Lindt
  2. Did you hear about the laundry machine at the gym? It has washboard abs.
  3. I'm going to do you like I do the laundry... and leave it all to a machine.

Laundry Machine Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about laundry machine you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean laundry jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make laundry machine pranks.

I just love to do special things for my wife on Valentine's day.

Like open the door for her when she puts all the laundry in the washing machine, or plug and unplug the vacuum as she moves from room to room cleaning.
Guys, it's these little thoughtful things you can do to have a marriage such as mine.

Sharing a washing machine in college

I was going to the college laundry room to wash my clothes and noticed someone left their clothes in the dryer that I had booked.
Naturally I just went to take it out, but just as I did, a girl walked in, and saw me with my arms full of her towels and underwear.
She gave me a very weird look, so I tried to explain, that I had booked the machine and such, and that I'm not a pervert.
But she just took her stuff and left, without saying anything.
I don't think she believed my explanation.
Or maybe she just couldn't understand what I was saying because I still had her p**... in my mouth.

I was doing laundry with my dad

I was doing laundry with my Dad, getting ready for a wedding. We had the TV running to keep us company. There was some s**... commercial running about laundry detergent or something. He was just throwing stuff in the machine while watching the TV, not paying attention. I saw him about to put something of mine that was not machine washable into the machine and I yelled at him, "Dad wait don't put that in there!" He held it up and looked at it as I went back to watching TV, and he asked me, "Son, what is this?"
I replied, "Its a Tie Dad".

Newlywed Laundry

A newlywed couple arrived back from honeymoon to move into their tiny new flat.
"Care to go to bed?" the husband asked.
"Shh!" said his blushing bride. "These walls are paper thin. The neighbours will know what you mean! Next time, ask me in code - like, 'Have you left the washing machine door open' - instead."
So, the following night, the husband asks: "I don't suppose you left the washing machine door open, darling?"
"No," she snapped back, "I definitely shut it." Then she rolled over and fell asleep.
The next morning, she woke up feeling a little frisky herself, so she nudged her husband and said: "I think I did leave the washing machine door open after all..."
"Don't worry," said the man. "It was only a small load so I did it by hand."