Laundering Jokes
47 laundering jokes and hilarious laundering puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about laundering that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Do you want to earn money and have a good laugh while doing it? Learn more about the funny business of money laundering, including jokes about drycleaning, and what detergent is used to make the most of it.
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Funniest Laundering Short Jokes
Short laundering jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The laundering humour may include short laundry jokes also.
- My dad come up to my room, and handed me my soaking wet wallet, after accidentally leaving it in my jeans as they went through the wash. "Son, you're going to have to stop money laundering."
- A spy, an adulterer, and a guy who launders money for the Russian mob walk into a bar... The bartender says "What'll it be, Mr. President?"
- A lawyer, a spy, a money launderer, and a mob boss walk into a bar. The bar tender looks up and says, "you must be here to talk about adoption".
- My dad accidentally left cash in his pocket when he washed his pants in the washing machine He proud screamed throughout the house "Hey everyone I'm laundering money"
- Today I accidentally put my wallet in the washing machine I suppose I'm now a money launderer
- I accidentally left my wallet in my jeans when I put them in the washing machine. A few days later I got arrested for money laundering.
- I was arrested for washing my pants without taking the cash out of my pockets. They charged me for laundering money.
- did my laundry, and at the bottom of my basket were a couple of crumpled $1s As I smoothed them out for folding, my wife looked over at me, so I said "laundered money"
True story - I got arrested for asking around for advice on money laundering I don't get it.
During this COVID-19 pandemic, I thought the least I could do to stay safe was to disinfect my money. - My dad had the ultimate dad joke... When we were little, he'd tell us how we had to remember to take our wallets out of our jeans when we put in the washing machine.
Because that's laundering money.
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Laundering One Liners
Which laundering one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with laundering? I can suggest the ones about laundry up and washing clothes.
- Why did the Bee laundromat close down? They were arrested for honey laundering.
- Money Laundering If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, it's Donald.
- A custodian stole some money. She was charged with money laundering.
- I like my clothes the way I like my money Laundered.
- Found out my son is laundering money His wallet is ruined
- How did Lex Luthor hide his money laundering from superman? He used a krypton-currency.
- What do you call a man who hides his cash in a washing machine? A money launderer.
- Height of poshness... Using laundered condoms
- Did you hear about the coin laundering scheme? It made cents!
- Britain's new £5 note is washable. Gives new meaning to the phrase "laundering money"
- Does money shrink when you wash it? No, but it does when you launder it!
- I did some money laundering Now it's all in the dryer.
- My wallet just went through the wash. I guess you could say I've been laundering money.
- What do you do if you get dirt on your momey? Got to a money launderers
- I just successfully laundered $100. I left it in my pocket.
Money Laundering Jokes
Here is a list of funny money laundering jokes and even better money laundering puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Last night, I forgot to take my wallet out of my pants I could have been arrested for money laundering
- I'm pretty sure my local corner shop is a money laundering front. I've been in there about 1000 times and not once have I seen a corner for sale.
- I accidentally left a dollar in my pants pocket, and it went through the washer and dryer. I hope the police don't find out about my money laundering scheme...
- I was folding my pants, fresh out the drier, and found a dollar in a pocket. Jesus Christ... How long have I been laundering money?
- I was telling my wife that Paul Manafort spent over 900K on rugs using laundered money... To which she replied, "Wow, I bet he only got like 4 rugs."
- My dad always told me to always check my pants pockets before I put them in the washer, in case there was some money. Because if you leave it there, you could be arrested for laundering money.
- A cow got arrested... What do you call it when a cow gets arrested for money laundering?
Moolaw - I started laundering money... I'm using a washing machine company as my front. The money looks extra clean.
- I left cash in my pocket when I put my pants in the washing machine I was arrested for money laundering
- What happened to the man who hid his money in a washing machine? He got arrested for money laundering
Cheerful Laundering Jokes for Unforgettable Laughter with Friends!
What funny jokes about laundering you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean laundry detergent jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make laundering pranks.
The blinds store
So there's this store down the street called "Bailey's Blinds", and I can't help but wonder that it must be a front for some sort of i**... activity. Money laundering, perhaps? Or maybe it's an incognito hub for illicit products of some nature. I mean, how can a business possibly function for over 15 years while consistently profitable, by selling nothing but blinds? ...It's a shady business if you ask me.
My wife threatened to call the cops if I didn't start checking the pockets of our clothes when I did laundry.
I asked "And what exactly do you expect them to charge me with?"
She said, "Money laundering."
I accidentally laundered my headphones today
Now they smell nice and I'm getting some really clean sound.
A woman went to the dry-cleaners...
...to pick up a dress she'd had laundered.
The man behind the counter hands over her garment and just as she's about to leave he says "come again".
With that the woman turns round and says "no, it was just toothpaste this time".
There once was a washing machine that loved washing stuff he found...
He would find ANYTHING on the ground, forcefully shove it inside him, clean it, and take it out. One day he found some money on the ground and did his usual routine before being apprehended by the FBI. He was arrested for Money Laundering.
