The Best 45 Launch Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Launch jokes. There are some launch icbm jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these launch hubble puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Launch Jokes and Puns

A cow joke

Our professor started our lecture on ketosis of dairy cows by telling us about an exciting new research project at our veterinary school's dairy facility. They are working with NASA to launch some cows into outer space to orbit the earth. The title of the project is The herd shot round the world.

How many Syrians does it take to launch a missle?

Two. One to launch it, and one to watch CNN to find out where it landed.

So there's two astronauts on a rocket...

One says to the other, "Get Ready, it's almost time for launch." To which the other says "Launch?! I haven't even had breakfast yet!"

Launch joke, So there's two astronauts on a rocket...

When does an astronaut eat his favourite meal?

At launch time.

What's the name of NASA's launch button?

The "Space Bar"


A conservative, a liberal and a moderate walk into a bar

The conservative orders a whisky, the liberal a white Russian. After a single sip of each they launch into a wild argument with each other.

The bartender turns and asks the moderate what he wants.

Replieth the moderate, "Nothing. I'm the one who has to drive them home."

Researchers recently unveiled a device will launch stinging insects at high speeds.

It has beegun.

Launch joke, Researchers recently unveiled a device will launch stinging insects at high speeds.

I think I'm starting to see why it's a bad idea to give Trump access to nuclear launch codes...

He'll just fire them

North Korea's launch code

↑ ↑ ↓ ↓ ← → ← → B A

How do they launch a champagne factory?

They throw a boat at it.

At what time in the day do rockets eat and why?

At noon because they take LAUNCH.

You can explore launch missile reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean launch naut dad jokes. There are also launch puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


To silence her critics who hail her as Satan, Hillary is set to launch a new post-apocalyptical video game after winning the election!

It's called President Evil.

We don't have to worry about Trump having the nuclear launch codes.

His hands are too small to push the button.

when did star wars launch

during the ray gun administration

I'm launching an app that reads out nihilist quotes.

It's aimed at a Nietzsche market

Breaking News : Apple soon to launch their cars.

with no windows though.

Launch joke, Breaking News : Apple soon to launch their cars.

I was kicked out of NASA today.

Apparently; "To Bed Bath and Beyond!" is not an appropriate quote to say during launch.

The Kardashians are all in a rocket set to launch, you can press a button to stop the launch.

Would you order a cheese or pepperoni pizza?

Trump administration is good

because its been more than 100 days and he still hasn't tweeted the nuclear launch codes


What do North Korea and Matthew McConaughey have in common?

Failure to Launch

The US Navy is starting to worry about the North Korean military.

Since all the missles they launch at Washington end up hitting the ocean, the odds are they will eventually hit a ship.

I saw Comedy Central launch a funny non-political TV show...

Then I woke up

SpaceX to launch ten cows up into orbit

It'll be the herd shot around the world.

A millihelen.

A face that could launch one ship...

What did the bully say to Nasa?

Gimmie (all) your launch money

The nuclear launch codes have been updated.

Now they're 281 letters long.

I want to launch a book about constipation

But it didn't come out yet.

Godspeed Elon Musk

I hope you successfully launch that heavy load into space.

What's Elon Musk's favorite meal of the day?

Launch.

I should of bought some SpaceX stock yesterday before the launch.

I heard it really skyrocketed.

A vacuum cleaner company removed their latest model from stores a week after launch,

All user reviews said that it sucked.

Did you hear about the new pickle flavored bread?

So since Pickle flavor is in style now with sonics new pickle juice shake, I think I'm going to launch a line of pickle flavored pastry. I'm going to call it Dilldough.

What happens to a rocket when it doesn't launch?

It gets fired.

To celebrate the launch of the new website we are offering one lucky winner $50 in cash or a meal for 2 at an Elvis Presley tribute.

Just comment '1' for the money or '2' for the show.

I think that the nuclear launch codes should be kept in the hands of women, and those codes should also represent the number of sexual partners they have had.

That way they will never give up the real numbers under any circumstances.

After Peter Jackson's successful launch of World War 1 documentary They Will Not Grow, George Lucas has announced he is making a documentary of World War 2 with remastered footage.

Spoiler: France invades first.

I launched a book aimed for 9-12 year olds

And I'm proud to say I hit one of them

The president opens his curtains on a snowy morning when he sees that someone had urinated the words "The president sucks" on the lawn.

Furious, the president orders the FBI to launch an investigation.

Two hours later, the head of the FBI calls the president. "Sir, we have bad news, and we have even worse news. The urine was the Vice Presidents".

The President responds, "What? What could be worse than this?"

The head of the FBI says,"The handwriting was the First Lady's".

In an alternate universe, the Curiosity rover launch moments after lift-off.

As the rover exploded mid air, the broken pieces of Curiosity fell back to the face of Earth and scattered across the land. Unfortunately, a particularly sharp piece just happened to impale a cat walking about outside.

They said that Curiosity killed the cat.

I once tried launching an aeroplane business.

It never took off.

We are launching a Food App that will help you lose your weight

You'll order but we won't deliver.

Apple wanted to launch a new product directed at children.

In retrospect, it was probably not the best idea to call it "iTouch Kids".

What's the meal that the people at NASA usually skip?

Launch.

Tesla to launch a new Electric lawnmower

It will be called e-Lawn!

It was recently announced that on July 20th, Jeff Bezos and his brother will launch into space on one of his Blue Origin spacecraft

If nothing else, now they will know what it's like to piss in a bottle

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the launch startup jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working launch inaugural piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes