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Ladies Man Jokes

26 ladies man jokes and hilarious ladies man puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about ladies man that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Ladies Man Short Jokes

Short ladies man jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The ladies man humour may include short lady boy jokes also.

  1. My Husband died. (One for the Ladies.) After He died, I couldn't even look at another Man for almost 20 years.
    But now that I'm out of Prison, I can honestly say it was worth it.
  2. A man with dementia walks into a bar He spot a pretty lady, sits next to her and asks, "So, do I come here often?"
  3. German women love me... I'm a ladies man. I saw this fine German woman. I didn't even have to chat her up for her to hastily give me her number. It was easy to remember 999 9999.
  4. A lesbian couple got their elderly neighbor a Rolex for his birthday... Upon opening it the man said, This is really nice, but I think you ladies misunderstood when I told you I wanna watch
  5. Ladies please stop asking Santa for the perfect man That fella has tried to kidnap me 4 times this week
  6. My grandmother used to tell me the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. Lovely lady. Terrible surgeon.
  7. A woman stands on a boardwalk... She notices a man below looking up her dress.
    "You, sir, are no gentleman!"
    "And you, lady, are no blonde!"
  8. Two newfies are walking down a path... They see a sheep tangled up in a fence. The one says "man, I wish that was a pretty lady" to which his friend replys "i just wish it was dark"
  9. A man enters an elevator of a fine hotel and says "Ballroom please" To which the lady standing in front of him replies "I'm sorry, I didn't realize I was crowding you."
  10. Did you know that during child birth there is a point where the lady experiences such excruciating pain that for a moment She almost knows how bad it is to be a man who has the flu

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Ladies Man One Liners

Which ladies man one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with ladies man? I can suggest the ones about lady and ladies and gentlemen.

  1. What did the fat lady say to the fat man? Thanks for the tip.
  2. A blind man walks past a fish market and says ...good afternoon ladies.
  3. Kennedy put a man on the moon.... Obama put a man in the ladies room.
  4. What did the blind man say when he walked past the fish market? Good afternoon, ladies
  5. The invisible man heads to the ladies locker room... they didn't see him coming.
  6. A blind man walks into a fishing district He says, Hey Ladies.
  7. A blind man walks into a fishmongers shop... And says "Good morning ladies!"...
  8. Its 2018 ladies, better treat your man right Other another man will
  9. A blind man walks into a fish market... smiles and says, *"Hello ladies. "*
  10. Ladies, I could be the man of your dreams because I'll be gone when you wake up.
  11. What did the blind man say when he walked past the fishmonger? "Hello ladies!"
  12. A boy is selling fish on a corner ... ... a blind man passes by and says "hello ladies".
  13. What did the blind man say when he passed by the fish shop? Hello ladies
  14. What did the blind man say when he arrived at the fish market? "Hello, ladies."
  15. My buddy lug is a real ladies man They love his lugnuts

Fun-Filled Ladies Man Jokes to Make You and Your Friends Chuckle & Giggle

What funny jokes about ladies man you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean married man jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make ladies man pranks.

The bible purposely leaves out the decade of Jesus' life in his 20s because he was clearly a ladies man...

I mean, he can turn water into wine, and was well hung. What do you expect!

I hate it when people want to argue over the use and meaning of words. For example, I like to think of myself as a "ladies man."

But the jury preferred the term "r**...."

Does hanging out with girls make you appear more attractive?

I mean like yeah you see someone hanging out with a girl you think like " oh good for him "
You see a guy around two girls you are like wow what a ladies man
But once you hit 3 girls you realize he's just gay

Grammatically, S is a very important letter

It's the difference between being a ladies man and a lady man.

A man walks up to god and asks him, "Are you a ladies man?" God replies:

"I'm a soul man."

A kindly old man is walking by the seaside when he sees three lovely young ladies crying their eyes out.

So he says, "Dear me, you poor things, so miserable on such a lovely day as this! Come and have a cup of tea and let's see if we can't make you feel better."
Won over by his twinkly-eyed charm, the three young ladies manage to dry their eyes and they follow him to a chintzy little seaside cafe where he orders a slice of Victoria sponge cake all round and a p**... of tea for four.
When the tea and cake arrives, he smiles sweetly and says, "Now, who's going to be mother?"
And all three young ladies burst into tears again.

How was your night?

John and Roy, two good friends, decide to go out to a bar on a Friday night and have a little fun. After a while, the two get bored and they each go their own way.
John, a bit tipsy (and a performer at heart), decides to try out in the bar's karaoke competition. To his surprise, he takes first place and wins a huge trophy!
Roy, the ladies man of the two, tries to find the most beautiful girl in the bar, and low and behold, Roy gets to talking with an absolute knockout, 10 out of 10. Things start to get serious, and eventually they head back to Roy's apartment.
The next day, the two meet back up at the same bar.
"How was your night, John?" Roy asked.
"Fantastic!" Said John. "Veni, vidi, vici, as the saying goes. I came. I saw. I conquered. What about you?"
Roy thought for a minute, and then smiled.
"What can I say? Vidi, vici, veni."

So my buddy is the best ladies man I know,

so one day at the bar I tell him, "Hey, I want to pick up someone here."
He tells me, "What you got to do is know what drink each one likes. Like for example." He points to a young looking brunette and says, "Jello Shots definitely jello shots." Then he points to an older looking woman and says, "Whiskey definitely whiskey." Then he finally points to this gorgeous blonde and he says, "Liquor definitely liquor."
And I'm like, "Lick her? I hardly know her!"

A long, long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...

There lived a Jedi known as Luke Skywalker. Luke was a mighty warrior, and quite the ladies man. His use of his 'lightsaber' attracted the eye of the beautiful Princess Leah. Luke wooed the Princess, and they fell in love. All was great in the world, until Han Solo, the ex lover of Princess Leah, filled Luke in on a little secret. Princess Leah is Luke's sister! Luke was obviously distraught! Freaking out, he went to find his master, Obi Wan Kenobi. Luke said to him, "Master Obi Wan! My beautiful wife is my sister! What do I do?!"
Master Kenobi, keeping his cool, looked his apprentice in the eye and said, "Luke, use divorce."

jokes about ladies man