Kum Jokes
19 kum jokes and hilarious kum puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about kum that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Kum Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good kum joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
Just found out watermelons are 92% water......
In completely unrelated news, I'm never eating another k**....
A Afghan man named Ahmed is walking down a dirt road with his wife ahead of him a few steps.
He meets another man going the opposite way.
"Salam aleikum, brother" he says.
"Aleikum Assalam" replies Ahmed.
"Did you know that the Great Prophet would never allow a woman to walk ahead of him?" asks the man.
Ahmed replies, "And did you know that there were no minefields in the time of the Prophet?" He then turns to the wife, "Keep walking, Saida."
What do Canadians call a Kumon teacher in Japan?
It's common-sense, eh?
What do you get when you cross p**...-willows with d**...-w**...?
Kumquats.
I told my girlfriend I wanted to try the orca in bed tonoght.
I wanted to see how long I can last Tilikum.
Question
James and Kumar were having a conversation when James asked Kumar a question.
J: what mouse walks on two legs?
K:(thinking hard).....ummm....I don't know
J: it's Mickey mouse you idiot
K: oh...ok
James then asks another question
J: which duck walks on two legs
K: this one's easy...it's Donald duck
J:all ducks walk on two legs you d**....
K:.....
How long do I usually sit at Seaworld m**...?
Tilikum
I'm making a film on waterfowl.
It's a duckumentary!
How do you greet a Muslim llama?
Assa llama leykum
I just explained to my socially conservative friend that watermelons are more than 90% water.
He said, I'm never eating a k**... again.
Violent killer whales really get me off
I like to watch tilikum
I've started a martial arts school for small-breasted women.
It's called Itty Bitty t**... Kumite
What do you call Murayan Sukumaran's new wife?
A necrophiliac.
Writing prompt: Harambe, Cecil, and Tilikum walk into a bar...
Who has the best punch line?
Have you heard of that new STD that broke out in Hawaii?
It's called Kumoniwanaleiyu.
If Adele were a Muslim, she would probably sing
"Assalamualaikum from the other side"
What do you say to a Muslim butcher?
Salami Alaikum
What do you call a k**... used as a s**... toy?
A Camequat.
Learn Chinese in five minutes joke
It's very dark in here - Wai So Dim?
Small Horse - Tai Ni Po Ni
See me A.S.A.P. - k**... Hia Nao
s**... Man - Dum g**...
Are you harboring a fugitive? - Hu Yu Hai Ding?
Has your flight been delayed? - Hao Long Wei Ting?
Your price is too high!! - No Bai De Thing!!
Did you go to the beach? - Wai Yu So Tan?
I bumped into a coffee table - Ai Bang Mai Ni
I think you need a facelift - Chin Tu Fat
I am not guilty - Wai Hang Mi?
That was an unauthorized execution - Lin Ching
This is a tow away zone. - No Pah King
Do you know the lyrics to the Macarena? - Wai Yu Sing Dum Song?
You are not very bright - Yu So Dum
I thought you were on a diet - Wai Yu Mun Ching?
I got this for free - Ai No Pei
Please, stay a while longer. - Wai Go Nao?
Our meeting was scheduled for next week. - Wai Yu k**... Nao
They have arrived - Hia Dei k**...
Stay out of sight - Lei Lo
He's cleaning his automobile - Wa Shing Ka
That’s not right - Sum Ting Wong
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