JokoJokes

Knocked Unconscious Jokes

9 knocked unconscious jokes and hilarious knocked unconscious puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about knocked unconscious that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Share These Knocked Unconscious Jokes With Friends




Laughter Knocked Unconscious Jokes for Everyone for Fun and Frivolity

What is a good knocked unconscious joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.

Two Native Americans

Unwittingly walk into a gay bar and sit
down to order a pitcher of beer. As they're sitting there
s**... back on their ale, a gay guy walks up and says,
"How would you boys like a b**...?"
The one Indian stands up and decks the guy, knocking him
unconscious. He then sits back down and finishes his beer.
His buddy looks over and says, "Hey Joe, what did you do
that for?"
Joe replies, "Not sure but it was something about getting
a job!"

So there's a little guy sitting at a bar....(heard this years ago, hope it isn't a repost)

...when a much larger, muscular guy walks in who seems to have a chip on his shoulder. The big guy sits down next to the little guy and orders a beer, after a bit the big guy jumps up and completely out of nowhere punches the little guy, knocking him to the floor. "That's boxing, from Las Vegas."
The little guy picks himself up off the floor, dusts himself off, gets back on his stool and just quietly goes back to his drink. The big guy also sits back down, but after a few minutes he gets back up and kicks the little guy who slides all the way to the end of the bar. "That's karate, from Japan."
Again, the little fellow just quietly gets up, goes back to his seat, and resumes drinking. A few more minutes go by and the big fella gets up a third time, grabs the little dude, and throws him right into the door of the bar. "That's kung fu, from China."
This time, however, the little guy gets up and just walks out. After some time he walks back in, right up behind the big guy, and cracks him over the head, laying him unconscious in the floor. The little guy looks at the bartender and says "You tell that s**... when he wakes up that that was crowbar, from Sears and Roebuck."

An American pilot is flying a small plane across Australia.

He crashes in the Outback and is knocked unconscious. When he comes to, he's in a hospital with a nurse standing over him. Still groggy and pretty much out of it, he asks "Did you bring me here to die?" Nurse says "Nah, ya got here yesta die."

A very drunk man gets kicked out of a bar...

A very drunk man gets kicked out of a bar. He stumbles down the street and happens upon a nun walking the other direction.
Out of nowhere, he s**... punches her and knocks her to the ground. He continues to beat her up until she's unconscious.
He takes a step back, looks at her, and says, "Not so c**... now, are you batman?!"

I had to knock a goose unconscious to collect his feathers for Dracula's pillow.

Now he's down for the Count.

A double bass player

A double bass player gets a call for a gig. Says he has to meet everyone else at the docks at 9pm. He's there waiting when he gets bashed on the head and knocked unconscious.
He wakes up ducked taped to his bass, floating in the harbour. After his first panic fades he looks around and notices several other players also ducked taped to their basses, bobbing in the water.
After a pause he yells out "Hey, do we get fed on this gig?"
"We did last year!" one answers.

I was trekking through the Brazilian rain forest with LL Cool J...

... when from out of nowhere a small creature lept from the trees and hit me straight in the face knocking me unconscious.
I woke a few moments later and asked LL what had happened. He said, "A Marmoset knocked you out"

A man was sitting reading his Sunday newspaper

when his wife hit him on the head with a frying pan.
'What was that for?' the man asked.
The wife replied 'That was for the piece of paper with the name Jenny on it that I found in your pants pocket'..
The man then said 'When I was at the horse races yesterday Jenny was the name of the horse I bet on' the wife apologized and went on with the housework..
Three days later the man is watching TV when his wife bashes him on the head with an even bigger frying pan, knocking him unconscious.
Upon re-gaining consciousness the man asked why she had hit again.
Wife replied.. 'Your horse phoned'

Not quite heaven

A skydiver jumps out of the plane, and passes through a layer of heavy winds where he is blown way off course. He crashes into a tree, and is knocked unconscious. When he awakes, he is surrounded by a number of beautiful, n**... women. In the distance he sees a sign that says heaven.
Thinking to himself that he must have died, he says aloud, heaven is more beautiful than I imagined, then he hears a voice behind him. He turns to see a older n**... male who says to him, "This isn't heaven, this is Heavenly Shores Nudist Camp, and you're not a member."

Share These Knocked Unconscious Jokes With Friends