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Kitchen Sink Jokes

39 kitchen sink jokes and hilarious kitchen sink puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about kitchen sink that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Kitchen Sink Short Jokes

Short kitchen sink jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The kitchen sink humour may include short bathroom sink jokes also.

  1. My wife wasn't too happy when I mentioned that our limited budget meant deciding between improving the kitchen plumbing or replacing the pool pump. Its either sink or swim.
  2. Hey neighbour, the plumber is outside with your new kitchen basin, waiting for you to open the door. Let that sink in.
  3. I ordered a new kitchen sink and by golly that thing grew legs and knocked on my door. Let that sink in.
  4. Where is the safest place to be on a capsizing ship? (Worst joke ever) The Galley!
    Everything but the kitchen sinks.
    ^(I warned you)
  5. I used my opposite hand with the kitchen sink sprayer hose felt like someone else was doing the dishes
  6. A man's house fell into the ocean and was almost completely submerged. He watched everything but the kitchen sink.
  7. Life is all about perspective The sinking of the Titanic was a miracle!..to the lobsters...in the ships kitchen.
  8. I was packing up for vacation When my wife yelled from down stairs "YOU BETTER NOT BE TAKING EVERYTHING BUT THE KITCHEN SINK". I yelled back "thanks for reminding me i will go get the wrench"
  9. An Englishman went into a hardware store and asked to buy a kitchen sink. Would you like one with a plug?' asked the assistant.....'Don't tell me they've gone electric,' said the Englishman.¤
  10. This flood is devastating. Everything in my kitchen ended up sinking with the exception of a carton of ice cream and some root beer. They stayed afloat.

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Kitchen Sink One Liners

Which kitchen sink one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with kitchen sink? I can suggest the ones about kitchen and sinks.

  1. There's a kitchen appliance knocking at my door… I'll let that sink in.
  2. Why do Crusaders need kitchen sinks? To wash their Saladin.
  3. People often leave their kitchen basin outside in winter.. Let that sink in.!
  4. Ever got caught fapping under the kitchen sink? Me neither! Great spot, isn't it?
  5. What do you say if you spill mayonnaise in the kitchen sink? Happy Cinco de Mayo!
  6. What was the rock band doing at the kitchen sink? Moshing the dishes
  7. Why is there a window over the kitchen sink? So women can actually have a point of view.
  8. Did you know your kitchen faucet might raid your house? Let that sink in...

Comical & Quirky Kitchen Sink Jokes for a Roaring Good Time

What funny jokes about kitchen sink you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean kitchen appliance jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make kitchen sink pranks.

(Old joke alert - be gentle.)

So, a guy sees this girl home after a date.
She says
\- Do you want to come in? You'll have to be very quiet, my parents are upstairs.
\- Sure
So they go in to the sitting room, get on the couch, and start smooching.
The guy says
\- Sorry, I need to use your bathroom.
\- The bathroom is upstairs, and you might wake my parents. Can you go in the kitchen sink?
\- OK
Couple of minutes later, guy walks back in
\- Any paper?

Why is the galley the safest place to be on a capsizing ship?

Because everything but the kitchen sinks. =D
^(I feel dirty)

Did you hear about that new standing desk specifically designed for women?

They call it "kitchen sink".

Why do women have smaller feet than men? It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.

Why do women have small feet and get married in white?

To match the kitchen appliances and get closer to the sink to wash up.

What's the difference between a pontiff's chin and the kitchen sink?

One's covered in soap bubbles, while the other's covered in Pope stubbles.

The sinking of the titanic was a tragedy, of course. But...

I bet it seemed like a miracle to the lobsters in the kitchen.

v**... in the sink joke

A bride-to-be is stressing out over the fact that she’s not a v**..., but she’s told her future husband she is. She has no idea what to do and is talking to her friends about it, when one of the friends pipes up and says,
“Here’s what you do — buy some liver, stick it up there, and everything will be nice and tight and your husband will never know.”
So, the bride-to-be follows the advice, and on the wedding night, the newlywed couple has crazy s**... all over the place. On the kitchen counter, on the living room floor, all over the house. But when she wakes up in the morning, her new husband is gone, and all she finds is a note pinned to the pillow, which reads:
“Dearest, I’m sorry, but I’ve thought things over and I just don’t think things will work out between us. I had a wonderful time, but I’m sorry, I’ve thought about it, and we just weren’t meant to be. P.S. — Your v**... is in the sink.”

A newlywed couple were renovating their new house.

When they came to do the kitchen, they couldn't decide on which sink to choose. There were loads of nice looking models in the catalogue, and there were quite a few that matched the other decor.
One day, they were in the kitchen trying to finally decide on which one to choose. All of a sudden, a Hispanic man smashed through the window and started screaming that they had to choose the Waterbasin model.
The wife fainted from shock, and the man simply stood there with his jaw on the floor, too surprised to do anything.
Nobody expects the Spanish Sink Decision.

Makes you think

One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, 'Why are some of your hairs white, Mum?'
Her mother replied, 'Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.'
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, 'Mummy, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?'

A man and his wife finish dinner; she goes to clear his plate when he grabs her hand softly.

"Let's make love. Right now." The wife responds to the request tepidly, "But I have to clean up." The husband begs, "Can't it wait?" The wife relents.
They are having s**... when the man asks for a b**.... She remembers the mess in the kitchen and, seeing an opportunity, says, "Okay, but I don't want to see a single dish in that sink tonight." He eagerly agrees.
The wife gives her husband a b**..., and when she's done, the man pulls out a blindfold. Surprised, the wife purrs, "What are you going to do to me?"
Perplexed, the husband responds: "You said you didn't want to see the dishes."

A woman wakes up one night

...to see that her husband isn't in bed for some reason. Curious, she gets up and walks out to the kitchen, where she sees him sobbing over the sink. "Honey, what's wrong?" She asks. Her husband turns to her and says,
"Do you remember that day twenty years ago when your father caught us in my car at that drive-in theater, and said that if I didn't marry you he'd put me in jail for twenty years?"
The wife, confused, says "Yes, but what does that have to do with anything?" to which the husband replies "I would have gotten out today."

Why are there rugs in front of the stove and the sink?

So women know where to stand in the kitchen.