Kitchen Knife Jokes
10 kitchen knife jokes and hilarious kitchen knife puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about kitchen knife that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Uproarious Kitchen Knife Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time
What is a good kitchen knife joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
The wife's weight gain, through overeating and laziness, had become the final straw in an already strained relationship and I decided I would just have to kill her.
I hid in the kitchen, knowing it wouldn't be long before she turned up looking to raid the fridge. And sure enough, she soon came waddling in.
I leapt out from behind a cupboard, arm raised, brandishing a huge knife..
"OH MY GOD!!" She screamed at the top of her lungs. "Are we having cake?"
I had a dream I was attacked in my kitchen by a giant head of cabbage. I grabbed a knife and stabbed, hacked, and slashed at it, but it still kept coming! I threw a jar of mayonnaise at it, to no avail -- then I hurled a bag of carrots, but nothing would stop it! In the end...
I fought the slaw and the slaw won.
I was fired from my job in a restaurant kitchen for refusing to slice up one of the condiments with a knife...
I just didn't cut the mustard.
A man accidentally dropped his kitchen knife onto his foot and unfortunately lost his toe.
The Doctor said "I have good news and bad news"
Man.. "Whats the bad news Doc?
Doc.. "Well, you see, they had to replace your toe with a piece of candy."
Man.. "Candy? So what's the good news?"
Doc.. "You now have tic tac toe"
What did the man say about his kitchen?
I hate it. The knifes think they're so sharp, the refrigerator thinks that he's so cool, and my freezer is cold-hearted.
Parenting is sometimes like being a criminal
For instance when I'm in the kitchen and yell "Stay back! I have a knife"
What's a musician's favourite kitchen utensil?
A Chopin' knife!
I had a nosebleed all of the sudden in the kitchen
Now how am I supposed to tell them that my wife fell on the knife?
Joe and the spoon
Joe and Carl are roommates.One time when Carl returned from job he saw Joe in the kitchen hitting his wrist with a spoon.Carl asked Joe what is he doing. Joe answered
-I'm gonna kill myself.
Carl facepalmed and said:
-Why don't you try with a knife ?
Joe rolled his eyes and said:
-I already tried, but it hurts too much.
What do you call a nightlight in the kitchen?
A knife light!
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