The Best 46 Kinder Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Kinder jokes. There are some kinder merciful jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these kinder compassionate puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Kinder Jokes and Puns

Our kids are very kind

But German kids are kinder

What's the difference between a kinder surprise and Michael jackson.

One is a choking hazard for children and the other is a chocolate covered candy

New dating app for German Catholic Priests


Kinder joke, New dating app for German Catholic Priests

Whilst in America, my son and I went shopping in Wal-mart. I asked the cashier if they had any Kinder eggs.

"Oh no, sir, we don't sell them in the States - they are a health hazard!"

"Okay," I replied. "I'll just take these two assault rifles then."

I've developed an app for dating children nearby. It's called Kinder.

A kindergarten teacher asks her students what animals provide us...

She said, "What does a chicken give us?" and the students replied, "Eggs". She then asked, "What does a pig give us?" and the students replied a joyous "Bacon". Finally she asked "What does a cow give us?" and before anyone could answer little Johnny said "Homework".

Joke provided by my ten year old son.

No matter how kind you are...

No matter how kind you are, German kids are kinder.

Kinder joke, No matter how kind you are...

How do you call unexpected pregnancy in German?

Kinder Surprise

When I was in kindergarten...

I met a really beautiful girl. We really liked each other. We were constantly kissing and holding hands, even showed our private parts, until one day the teacher came and caught us, needless to say, I got fired.

So I just got back from a trip in Germany, and I realized how awful American children are.

While they may be nice and all where I live in NYC, kids in Germany are kinder.

Which country has the nicest children?


German children are kinder.

You can explore kinder psn reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean kinder danke dad jokes. There are also kinder puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Hitler asks a jewish kid...

Hitler wants to hear the dreams of jewish kids. So, he visits Auschwitz and finds one kid sitting in a corner, freezing to death.

"Hallo kinder, what is your dream?"

"Herr Hitler, when I grow-"

"IF..IF you grow up."

Have you heard of the new dating app for Catholic priests?

It's called "Kinder".

Going through customs at a US airport

Customs agent: Do you have anything to declare today?
Me: *starts sweating* ummmmm no. *trips and falls. Hundred of Kinder eggs spill from my pockets, jacket and bag*
Customs agent: GET ON THE FLOOR NOW!
Me: But, I am -
*armed guards swarm around and pin me down*
Armed guards: WHAT'S IN THE EGGS!!!
Me: I don't know, it's a surprise!!

(Sorry if the formatting sucks. On mobile)

What dating app do priests use?


Chris Cornell dies and goes to heaven

At the gate, St. Peter says, "because your beautiful voice and amazing talent brought happiness to so many people, we'll grant you one wish".

Chris thought about it for a moment and replied, "I'd like the world to be a kinder, better place".

So St. Peter killed Roger Ailes.

Kinder joke, Chris Cornell dies and goes to heaven

What is a pregnant woman to a cannibal?

Kinder Surprise.

American children are very mean

In Germany they are Kinder

What do cannibals call pregnant women?

Kinder surprise

Some German kids handed me a bunch of coins I'd never seen before.

Thanks for the strange gold, kinder!

Our generation was so much nicer... I know because I grew up in Germany...

...and we were all kinder

What do you call a dating app for paedophiles

Kinder tinder

No matter how nice you are...

German children will always be kinder

What is it called when a German has a tear in his condom

Kinder Surprise

Which dating apps do priests prefer to use?


British kids sure are kind

But German kids are kinder

Why do kindergarten teachers have bad eyesight?

Because their pupils are small.

What brand of chocolate is popular with German priests?


No matter how generous and caring your children are...

German children are kinder.

I've traveled the world and met people from many countries.

From my experience, American kids are some of the nicest, but German children are kinder

No matter how kind you are,

German children are always Kinder.

A kindergarten class had a homework assignment to find out about something exciting and relate it to the class the next day.

When the time came to present what they'd found, the first little boy walked up to the front of the class made a small white dot on the blackboard and sat back down. Puzzled, the teacher asked him just what it was.

"It's a period,'' said the little boy.

"Well, I can see that,'' she said, ''but what is so exciting about a period?''

''Darned if I know,'' said the little boy, ''but this morning my sister was missing one, Daddy had a heart attack, Mommy fainted, and the man next door shot himself."

Kindergarten Blonde

A blond girl comes home from her first day of kindergarten and says "most of the kids can count to 10, but I can count to 20. Is that because I'm a blond?"

Her mom says"yes dear, it's because you're a blond."

The next day the girl comes home and says "today we had to do our ABC's." Most of the kids only got half way, but I knew them all. Is that because I'm a blond, mom?"

"Yes dear, it's because you're a blond."

The following day the girl comes home and says "we had gym today and I noticed I'm more physically advanced than the others. . Is that because I'm a blond, mom?"

Her mom says " no dear. It's because you're 24."

English children may be kind...

...but German children are Kinder.

German adults are mean

German kids are kinder.

Some weird German kid just gave me a gold coin.

Thanks for the gold, strange kinder!

It doesn't matter how kind you think your child is.

German children will always be kinder.

A kindergarten teacher was observing the children while they drew.

She would occasionally walk around to see each child's artwork.

As she got to Little Johnny who was working diligently, she asked what his drawing was.

Little Johnny replied, I'm drawing God.

The teacher paused and said, But no one knows what God looks like.

Without missing a beat, or looking up from his drawing Little Johnny replied, They will in a minute.

No matter how kind you are...

German kids are kinder

American kids are kind...

But German kids are kinder

French kids are kind..

But German kids are kinder

What does a cannibal call a pregnant woman?

A kinder surprise

A kindergartner asks to use the bathroom

Teacher: sing the ABC's, then I'll let you go

Kindergartner: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Teacher: Where's the P?

Kindergartner: It's running down my pants!

My kindergartner says that her favorite food is the powder at the bottom of the Cheerios bag

I think she's a cereal killer

They say that British kids are kind

But German kids are kinder.

We all know that no matter how kind you are, a German child is kinder

But let me tell you something, when they're being brats, they're the wurst!

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the kinder meaner jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working kinder safer piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes