kinda Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious kinda puns

How many GoT plot writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Only two, but they'll wait 6 or 7 seasons before screwing it up.

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I know global warming is bad

but wouldn't it be kinda funny if dinosaurs made humans go extinct?

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Every "yo momma" joke has been done thousands of times, by thousands of different people.

Kinda like yo momma.

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TIL: bumblebees can fly higher than mount Everest

Kinda obvious. Considering mount Everest can't fly

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I'm kinda scrawny, so I had to quit my job as a personal trainer

Yeah, I gave 'em my too weak notice

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Interviewer: So, tell me about yourself.

Me: I'd rather not... I kinda want this job.

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My first highschool football game was a lot like my first time having sex...

I was pretty roughed up, sore, and kinda bloody, but at least my dad came (:

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Every "yo mamma" joke has been done thousands of times, by thousands of people.

Kinda like yo mamma.

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The UK Government has decided to make LSD legal as a drug for weight loss

It makes sense if you think about it. It's kinda hard to get to the fridge when there's a dragon guarding it...

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A man rolls thru a STOP sign and a cop pulls him over

"I pulled you over because you failed to stop at that stop sign. You only slowed down."


"Slow down... stop... what's the difference?"


The cop pulls the man out of his car and begins beating him with his nightstick.

"Now you tell me whether you want me to stop... or slow down."

*This joke was told to me by a police officer, which made it kinda scary.

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Kinda scared for 2017

Because 2+0+1+7 is 10 - the exact number of nipples Hitler would have if he had 8 more

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The two old-timers...

...were having a chat over the back fence.


"You know, Chester," said one, "you should invest in some heavier curtains for your bedroom window."


"Why's that, Clem?"


"Because the ones you have now are kinda transparent. In fact, last night I could see you making love to your wife."


"Pfft! That shows how bad your eyesight is. I wasn't even home last night!"

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How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Only two, but its kinda hard to get em in there.

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I felt kinda sick at the airport earlier...

It could be a terminal illness.

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Kinda corny but it did actually crack me up...

Q. What do you get if you insert human DNA into a chimpanzee?
A. Banned from the Zoo.

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A farmer goes to the market to buy a rooster

He sees one he likes, so he asks the seller:"Is he any good for mating?"

"Oh, no problem there, he screwed every single chicken I had. He even tries to screw ducks, turkeys, even pigs!"

"Then why" asks the puzzled farmer "are you even selling him?"

"You see" answers the seller "lately he's been looking at me kinda funny."

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A homeless man told me this one. (Kinda NSFW)

Why do women have two pairs of lips?

One to bitch with, and one to apologize with.

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I like playing chess with bald people in the park

The problem is, it's kinda hard to find 32 of them

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I was standing at the bar one night minding my own business.

This FAT ugly chick came up behind me, grabbed my behind and said,
"You're kinda cute. You gotta phone number?"
I said, "Yeah, you gotta pen?"
She said, "Yeah, I got a pen".
I said, "You better get back in it before the farmer misses you."

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Marriage is like having your favorite meal every day...

At first, it's great! But after a week, you're thinking, "Eh, I kinda feel like having Asian tonight."

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Pooping is kinda like being in a relationship...

It's amazing at first but when it's over you feel empty inside.

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I once saw an Arab on a flight....

I was kinda shocked when I saw him and looked on him with suspicion. Then he understood what I was thinking and approaching me, he said, "Not all Muslims are terrorists" and we laughed so hard that his grenades fell out of his pocket.

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You woman gotta' realise, making us sleep on the couch ain't that bad...

It's kinda manly, makes us feel like we are camping. With an angry bear nearby.

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*Pollen accidentally enters body*

Immune system: What the hell is that?

Pollen: Oh hey. Sorry. We got a bit lost. The wind kinda bl-

Immune system: OH GOD WE'RE UNDER ATTACK!

Pollen: What?! No! We just got lo-

Immune system: OPEN THE FLOODGATES!

Pollen: The what?

Mucus membranes: Sir. All the floodgates?

Immune system: ALL OF THEM!

Pollen: Wait. Wait. You don't... Oh shi-

[Dramatic music]

Me: *sneezes*

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Non alcoholic beer is kinda like eating out your sister

It tastes the same, but it feels wrong

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I've never liked the guy who sang Take On Me...

He always seemed kinda sketchy.

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I met a little boy today.

He was sitting on the curb, dressed in rags. He had his face in his hands and it looked like he was crying.


I felt kinda bad he was all alone, so I went and sat down beside him.


I said, "Are you an orphan, little guy?"


As he looked up, his eyes were still red and his cheeks still wet. He managed to crack a small smile.


"Yeah. What gave me away?"


I leaned in close and whispered,



"Your parents."

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I saw some crippled kid getting picked on the other day...

He got kinda upset with me when I told him to stand up for himself.

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I heard that 1 in every 4 men are gay...

I hope it's Steve. He's kinda cute.

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Why don't I like trees?

They look kinda shady to me

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Friends are like bricks

it's kinda funny when you throw them through a window

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Star wars dad joke heard tonight

Dad "Chewbacca seems kinda big for an ewok..."

Me "he's a wookie. "

Dad "he can't be, he's been in lots of movies now."

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Two friends are talking to each other, and one says to the other,

"I've been kinda worried about you man, you're kinda in a slump right now, you seem kinda depressed."

The other looked at him in a state of shock, and said,

"You're a great friend, but you don't have to worry about me, suicide'll be the last thing I do."

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Wonder woman

Superman was kinda bored so he just started flying around looking for something to do. He's flying over Wonder Woman's house and sees her bedroom window is open. He stops for a glimpse and sees her lying on her bed naked. She's lying there and squirming around looking real hot.

Superman was getting turned on looking at her so he decides what the hell, I can just fly in real quick, give her the ole' in-out and be out of there before she even knows what hit her. After all he is Superman. So, in he goes, wham-bam and he's out of there.

Wonder Woman knew something happened and says, "What was that?" The invisible man says, "I don't know but, damn, is my ass sore."

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My kinda Dr.

a woman goes to a new gynocologist for the first time, for her annual pap smear. as the dr.is getting everything ready, and the woman is in the usual position, the dr. explains that there will be some discomfort. he then asks if she would like to numb the area first so she is more comfortable. she tells the dr. *yes please* and he then proceeds to bury his face between her legs and says...num num numnum...

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What are the most funny Kinda jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Kinda? Well, here are the best Kinda dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Kinda pick up lines to share with friends.

Joko Jokes