Kim Jong Un Jokes
117 kim jong un jokes and hilarious kim jong un puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about kim jong un that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Kim Jong Un Short Jokes
Short kim jong un jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The kim jong un humour may include short kim jong jokes also.
- They say Kim Jong Un has read every single book That must be why everyone calls him the supreme reader
- Why is Japan afraid of Kim Jong-un? because they remember what the last fat man did to them
- What's the difference between Kim jong un and dominoes ? Dominoes can deliver a crispy Hawaiian in less than 30 minutes
- So Kim Jong Un is apparently in a coma... ...Which is weird, because I thought his dad was the Il one.
- BREAKING: North korean leader in a vegetative state following surgery. They've begun calling him Kim Jong Un-Responsive
- When Kim Jong-Un met Donald Trump some questioned whether he could actually speak English It has now been reported that Trump actually managed several sentences in almost fluent English.
- Don't make fun of Kim Jong Un just because of his condition. It's not his fault he suffers from projectile dysfunction.
- What's the difference between Ellen Pao and Kim Jong Un? Kim Jong Un has control over his country.
- I've just sold some glass rocket to Kim Jong Un. I hope he's pleased with his new, clear weapons.
- I just read an article in the news that Kim Jong Un reads more than 1,000 books a year... I guess that's why they call him the Supreme Reader.
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Kim Jong Un One Liners
Which kim jong un one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with kim jong un? I can suggest the ones about kim jong il and kim il.
- What did Kim Jong-Un say yesterday before he died? My Korea is over
- Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape Kim Jong Un's long range missiles.
- Why does Kim Jong Un love books? Because he is the Supreme Reader.
- Vladimir Putin, Donald Trump and Kim Jong-Un jump off a cliff. Who wins? Mankind
- Why is Kim Jong-un so bad? He has no Seoul
- Why is Kim Jong-un so evil? He doesn't have a Seoul
- Why is North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Un so ruthless? He doesn't have a Seoul.
- What's the most hated vegetable in the world? Kim Jong un
- Why is Kim Jong-un so violent? Because he doesn't have a Seoul.
- Why does Kim Jong Un have such a big library? Because he's Supreme Reader
- If Kim Jong Un was a girl... Send nukes
- Why is Kim Jong-un so smart? Because he is Supreme Reader
- What's Kim Jong Un's favorite step of mitosis? Nuclear division.
- There are multiple reports claiming that Kim Jong-Un is dead. Another Un bites the dust.
- What is Kim Jong-Un's favorite beverage size? A supreme liter.
Laughable Kim Jong Un Jokes for Instant Grins & Giggles
What funny jokes about kim jong un you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean leader kim jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make kim jong un pranks.
Why is Kim Jong Un so cruel?
Because he doesn't have a Seoul.
Breaking news, as Kim Jong-Un's nuclear missiles have reached the USA!
Fortunately, the stamps were recognised and they were sent back
Why did Kim Jong Un Instagram his missile?
It was the only way he could send it.
So Kim Jong-un is claiming he personally hacked into Sony's servers in retaliation to them broadcasting a spoof interview.
Is there no end to this Olympic gold Medallist's
talent?
"The Interview" Joke
Kim Jong Un walks past a movie theater and sees a movie poster for "The Interview."
He says "I wouldn't be caught dead in that."
A North Korean soldier runs across the DMZ and yells to the US Army "Kim Jong Un is an idiot!" and gets thrown in a labor camp for 16 years by the government.
1 year for insulting the Dear Leader and the other 15 for revealing a state secret.
What would Kim Jong Un call his children?
His young'uns
What do you call Kim Jong-un reading a Stephen King novel?
Fearless Reader
Kim Jong-un read War and Peace in a day.
At least I think that's why they call him Supreme Reader.
They say Kim Jong Un is heartless and a m**......
It's because he has no Seoul
Kim Jong Un recently banned the blues scale...
He hates Seoul music
A North-Korean officer pulls out a megaphone at the North and South Korean border and yells "Kim Jong-Un is an idiot!" and gets sent to 31 years in a labor camp.
1 year for insulting the Dear Leader and 30 years for revealing a state secret.
Kim Jong-Un has promised a new clear future for North Korea.
Oops! Spelt ***nuclear*** wrong.
What weighs 20 times a North Korean?
Kim Jong Un.
Whenever I see Americans make fun of Kim Jong-un, I think to myself
Come on, you're bigger than that.
What's the difference between Kim Jong Un and Hillary Clinton?
One is called "The Great Leader" and the other, "Great Deleter"
Kim Jong Un walked into a bar
The North Korean media still said he got a gold for high jump
What does Kim Jong-un have in common with gingers?
No Seoul.
Why didn't Kim Jong Un cry when he heard his half brother, Kim Jong Nam, had been killed?
Because the news was unbereaveable.
Did you know that Kim Jong Un has read every book in existance?
Thats why they call him the Supreme Reader
How is the United States and frozen food the same?
Kim Jong Un doesn't have the technology to nuke either of them.
Trump, Putin, and Kim Jong Un are walking through the jungle
They all trip and fall into a pit of quicksand. A sign next to the pit reads, "the more you lie, the faster you sink." Kim Jong Un is up to his neck, and Putin is at his waist. Trump appears to be perfectly calm and not sinking at all. Putin asks how this is possible. Trump replies, "I'll be alright. I'm standing on Sean Spicer."
The Sun Mission
Kim Jong-un announced in a news conference that North Korea would be sending a man to the sun within ten years!
A reporter said - "But the sun is very hot. How can your man land on the sun?"
There was a stunned silence. Nobody knew how to react. Then Kim Jong-un quietly answered "We will land at night". The entire audience broke out in thunderous applause !
Back in the White House, Donald Trump and his entourage were watching the news conference on TV. When Trump heard what Kim had said, he sneered - "What an idiot. There is no sun at night time !"
Now, his cabinet broke up in thunderous applause !!
Why is Kim Jong Un so crazy?
His father was mentally Il.
If you are having trouble being the only fat person in your class...
Just remember that Kim Jong-un is the only fat person in his country.
If the United States is serious about stopping Kim Jong Un
Just send in Cam Newton - he'll overthrow Kim.
Western tourist in North Korea
So a western journalist goes on a tour of North Korea. He flies in to Pyongyang, an officially government licensed tour guide shows him around. He sees all the wonderful stores and streets that the city has to offer, and then finally he comes to the magnificent 30-story tall Kim Jong Un monument.
"Wow this is very beautiful, you must be very proud of it!" he said
his tour guide nodded— "yes, we must be very proud."
Why does Kim Jong-un have such a huge library?
He is Supreme Reader
Why is Kim Jong-Un such a good gardener?
Cause he's the supreme weeder.
Kim Jong Un claims to have golfed 38 under par...
...But his story is full of holes.
Trump, Merkel and Kim Jong-un are in the Middle East being chased by ISIS:
Trump turns to them and shouts: "Stop chasing us and I'll pay you a million dollars!" The terrorists continued.
Then Merkel turns to them and shouts: "Stop chasing us and I'll give you German citizenship!" The terrorists still kept chasing.
Then Kim Jong-un turns and shouts: "You are about to cross the border into the People's Democratic Republic of Korea. Welcome!"
The terrorists screamed and turned to run away.
What do Kim Jong Un, Donald Trump and a pulley have in common?
They all love being the center of a tension.
I messed up while sexting with Kim Jong Un.
"Send Nukes"
DPRK sends astronaut to the sun
Kim Jong Un is sitting in his office. He proudly tells his advisors:
North Korea will be the first country to send people to the sun!
His advisors break out in applause. Meanwhile Donald Trump is watching this live on TV. He calls Kim Jong Un and asks him:
How are you going to send people to the sun? It's too hot!
Kim Jong Un replies by saying to his advisors:
What an idiot! We can send them at night!
His advisors break out in applause. On hearing this Donald Trump says to his advisors:
What an idiot!…
There is no sun at night!
Kim Jong Un: I have a big button on my desk Donald Trump: I have a big button on my desk
Hawaii Emergency Alert Guy: Hold my beer
Kim jong il takes Kim jong un on a visit to a food processing company.
Il points at a machine and says: This one, you put a pig into it and sausages will come out on the other side. The power of science is amazing! To which Un replied: Is there a device then, where you put in a sausage, and pig comes out?
•
Kim jong il: YOURMOM
Kim Jong un would be great at call of duty
If team kills counted twords the "nuke" scorestreak
I just saw a picture of Kim Jong-un wearing glasses
He looks like a supreme reader.
I much prefer Kim Jong Un to Donald Trump
One of them was a businessman for most of his life, while the other has been a politician for his whole Korea!
What do you call it when Kim Jong Un is sick
Kim Jong Ill
Kim Jong Un was working for Thanos the whole time
He was trying to get the Seoul Stone
Kim Jong Un and Putin are riding in a plane together
When they flew over Russia, Putin said, "I threw 100 dollars out the window and made 100 of my peasants happy"
When they flew over North Korea, Kim said, "I threw 1,000 dollars out the window and made 1,000 of my peasants happy"
When they flew over the Ocean, the pilot told the co-pilot, "I could throw 2 people out of the window and make everyone happy"
If Donald Trump and Justin Trudeau were drowning
If Donald Trump and Justin Trudeau were drowning and you could only save one of them, where would you and Justin Trudeau go for lunch?
If Donald Trump and Kim-Jong Un were drowning and you could only save one of them, where would you and Justin Trudeau go for lunch?
Kim Jong Un and Vladimir Putin were having a meeting in a 20-story building.
During a break the two leaders made a bet about the loyalty of their guards.
First, Putin called his guard Ivan into the room, opened the window and said, "Ivan, jump down."
Ivan replied in tears, "Mr. President, how could you do this to me? I have a wife and a son."
Putin explained that he was only joking, and let Ivan out.
Then Kim Jong-Un called his guard Lee, and told him to jump. Lee started running toward the window.
Putin grabbed him and said, "Are you crazy? You will die if you jump!"
Struggling, Lee replied, "Let me go! I have a wife and a son!"
Why is Kim Jong UN so bent on nuking the world?
He has no Seoul
Just like his father, Kim Jong Un takes a binocular wherever he goes.
For proper gander purposes.
Why are North Koreans required to give their books to Kim Jong-un?
Because he is their Supreme Reader
Do you know how Kim Jong Un's father died?
He was very il
Did you hear about the surgeon who botched Kim Jong Un surgery?
Yeah, me neither.
Kim Jon Un is reported to be sick.
He is now Kim Jong Ill.
I heard that Kim Jong Un is sick.
I guess that makes him Kim Jong Ill
I guess Kim Jong-un is just like his father now
He's become Kim Jong-ill
Who will be Kim Jong-Un's successor?
Kim Jong-Deux
Kim Jong-Un isn't ill...
...that was his dad
Which vegetable does everyone hate whether they admit it or not?
Kim Jong-un
News headline indicates there's been a zombie outbreak in North Korea
Headline: Kim Jong, Un-Dead
There's a rumour that North Korean dictator, Kim Jong Un is dead.
But personally, I think he's just Kim Jong Un-well
Kim Jong Un is currently..
The Shrodingers cat of dictators.
A sociopathic egomaniac...
A sociopathic egomaniac authoritarian leader accused of causing the deaths of tens of thousands is brain dead. Meanwhile in North Korea, Kim Jong Un is reported to be in critical condition.
How many doubles does Kim Jong-un has?
None, there is not enough food in North Korea for second Kim Jong-un.
What do Kim Jong-Un and Bok Choy have in common?
Both are Korean vegetables
What do Schrodinger's cat and Kim Jong-un have in common?
They're both alive and dead until you see them!
