The Best 9 Kilo Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Kilo jokes. There are some kilo litre jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these kilo kilometer puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Kilo Jokes and Puns

What do you call a mockingbird that weighs 2,000 grams?

2 kilo mockingbird

My flatmates said I wasted my money buying a kilo of pasta..

..but I say it was worth every penne.

A guy goes into a grocery store.

He sees a pile of potatoes, and asks the store keeper:

"What are those?"

"Those are potatoes"

"Can I have a kilo of potatoes individually wrapped?"

The store keeper shakes his head and start wrapping potatoes.

"What are those?"

"Those are plums..."

"Can I have a kilogram of plums all individually wrapped?"

The store keeper cusses under his breath and starts packing plums.

"... and what are those?!

"Those are poppy seeds and they are NOT for sale!"

My wife and I were going on holiday

And we were discussing our secret sexual fetishes. She said she always wanted to be handcuffed. So I planted a kilo of coke in her suitcase.

My friend was caught with a kilo of weed in Saudi Arabia.

He was stoned.


If you came across 10 kilos of cocaine in the back of a rental car, what would you do?

Cocaine

After progressively lifting heavier weights, I was finally able to squat 600 pounds.

Unfortunately, all that money still weighs less than a kilo.

What was Pablo Escobar's favorite book?

Two kilo mockingbird.

My work fired me for only losing a kilo!

It sure is tough working for the International Bureau Of Weights And Measures...

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the kilo kilometre jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working kilo weigh piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes