The Best 22 Kids Knock Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Kids Knock jokes. There are some kids knock kid jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these kids knock toddlers puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Kids Knock Jokes and Puns

My dog came bounding into the house this morning with the neighbour's rabbit hanging lifeless from it's jaws.

Panic set in and so I scrubbed it clean and got all the blood marks off until it was pure white again. I then sneaked into their garden and popped it back in its hutch.

That evening my neighbour knocked at my door and said "I can't believe it, flopsy is lying dead in its hutch and the kids are hysterical."

"Sorry to hear that" I replied nervously.

"The strange thing is" he said "we buried it a couple of days ago."

A neighbor's wife knocks on the door

She says "Your kids can't play with our children any more."
"Why?" the man asks, shocked.
"They keeping on calling the other kids gay, you should watch your language around them!"
The man replies "They couldn't have learned it from me, otherwise they would have been calling them faggots"

How do you put an elephant in a fridge joke

A plane carries 500 bricks. 1 falls out. How many bricks are left?

How do you put an elephant in a fridge in 3 steps?
Open the fridge, put in the elephant, and close the fridge.
How do you put a deer in a fridge in 4 steps?
Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer, then close the fridge.
The Lion King is having a party. All the animals are there except for one; who is it?
The deer: He is still in the fridge.
An old lady is crossing a swamp, but it is a crocodile swamp. How does she cross? Normally, all the crocodiles are at the Lion King's party
Mary dies at the edge of the swamp. How?

A brick falls from the sky and kills her.

Knock knock Who's there?

Not Mary

A FedEx guy knocks on the door....

A FedEx guy knocks on the door. A little kid answers, naked except underpants, smoking a joint & holding half a bottle of Scotch.

FedEx guy says "Kid, is your mother home?"

The kid says "What do *you* think?"

For my cake day, a Harry Potter joke I made up when I was a kid...


~ Who's there?

~ You know

~ you know who?

*avada kedavra!*

Sorry if everyone knows that one, 7 year old me thought I was being very clever.

(A joke my 3 y/o nephew came up with)

Kiddo: knock knock

Mom: who's there?

Kid: Daddy. Because I locked the door. *laughs hysterically*


Why did Suzy fall of the swings?

Cause she had no arms.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Not Suzy.

What did Suzy get for Christmas?


Ha Ha just kidding that's mean

We actually don't know she hasn't opened it yet.

An 11 year old boy just told me his anti-vaxx joke

Knock knock!

Who's there?

Unvaccinated kid!

Unvaccinated kid who?

Oh never mind, it's an open casket funeral.

the day after halloween, a trick or treater knocked on my door.....

he was dressed in just red tights and a red spandex shirt, red sneakers, red hat.

i said to him, "sorry little buddy, halloween is over, i dont have anything for you today...what are you supposed to be anyway>?"

he said "im a period, sorry im late..scared ya didnt i?"

needless to say he got a handfull of candy from one of my kids bags. how could you not reward that creativity?

God wants to take a vacation

But he has no idea where to go. His archangel, Michael, is helping him decide.

"How about Pluto?" He asks

"Nah, it's too cold there."

"Well, what about Saturn?"

"Nah, not a fan of the rings."

"Well then how about Earth?"

"Are you kidding me? I vacationed there 2,000 years ago, accidentally knocked this chick up, and they're still talking about it!"

I heard this joke at a new museum opening in DC, told by a five year old:

Knock knock

Who's there?


Donut who?

Donut ask me, it's a secret.

That kid has a bright future of dad jokes ahead of him

You can explore kids knock fidget spinners reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean kids knock kids dad jokes. There are also kids knock puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

My kids favorite knock knock joke

Knock Knock

Whose there?

Interrupting Cow.

Interrupting C..**MOO!!**


Knock Knock

Whose there?

Interrupting Chicken.

*sigh* Interrupting Ch **BOCK BOCK BOCK!!!!**


Knock Knock

*sigh* Whose there?

Interrupting Fish.

*ponders* Interrupting F.. *SLAP! SLAP!* OW!!!

Want to hear a knock knock joke?

A: "Want to hear a knock knock joke?"

B: "Yeah sure."

A: "Ok great. You start it up."

B: "Ok. Knock knock."

A: "Who's there?"

B: Confused silence... Dawning comprehension...

My dad got me with this when I was a kid. I think it's pretty great.

A rubbish collector knocks on the door of a house that didn't leave their bin outside and an Asian man answers the door

>"Excuse me mate, where's ya bin?"

>"I bin Hong Kong!"

>"No where's ya wheelie bin?"

>"I wheelie bin Hong Kong!"

Sorry it's an old joke I heard as a kid!

For the kids...

Knock knock

Who's there

I eat mop

I eat mop who (I eat mah poo)

After a long night at the pub I knocked on the door quietly so I wouldn't wake the kids. I stood there and hoped that my wife was awake, then when there was no sign of her I shouted "Let me in!"

A man opened the door, and said, "Sir, please step away from my taxi."

So my 5yo kid is mad at the world this evening and he comes up with this masterpiece:

Him: Knock knock.

Me: Who's there?

Him: Nothing.

Me: (struggling to maintain a straight face) Nothing who?

Him: Don't. Say. Anything.

If doors could procreate, they'd have a lot of kids

considering that they're always getting knocked up.

A pizza man is delivering my pizza

I hear a knock on the door, so I say

"Who is it?"

The pizza guy replies

"The pizza delivery man"

I respond

"The pizza delivery man who?"

The pizza guy responds

"Come on kid! I have your pizza, and it's raining out here. Get the pizza already!"

I reply

"That's the best you got? You really need to work on your delivery"

An Awful Joke I Heard as a Kid.

A bunch of boys knock on a door and when a woman answers they ask her, "Can Johnny come out and play baseball with us?"

The woman says, "You boys know Johnny doesn't have any arms and legs."

"We know," they say, "we just wand to use him for second base."

Kid looking for odd jobs comes to a guys door

"Hey mister" he starts out, "I'm looking for some work for pocket money over the holidays".

Impressed by the youngster's work ethic the man says "Sure son; there's a few tins of paint in the garage. Go get them and paint the porch and I'll give you $20"

4 hours later there was a knock on the man's door by a paint spattered youth holding his hand out for payment who says "I've finished and by the way that's not a porch it's a BMW"

So a cannibalistic couple are try to decide what to have for supper one night...

When they hear a knocking at their front door. The husband opens the door where he sees a little boy crying. The kid then says, "Help me I'm lost, my name is Stuart and I live on 3rd street!" The wife hears the commotion and walks over to see what's going on, and the husband turns to her and says, " I guess we're having stew tonight."

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the kids knock bullies jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working kids knock preschool piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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