Following is our collection of Kids jokes which are very funny. There are some kids daughters jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these kids kids in hospital puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
You're coming home now! she screamed.
No, I'm not, I laughed.
She said, I'm talking to the kids.
You see, it used to get cold outside
Son to mother: "Mom, all the kids in the school are making fun of me because I am still a virgin."
Mother: "Well, start giving them bad grades and they will stop."
Unemployed with two kids and recently evicted
I pulled out my iPhone and said, "That's nice, but look at what kids your age make in China!"
So i send them to school wearing crocs and anime shirts and let other kids beat them instead
Social security
The scout leader says, "But that snake is venomous. Poison is ingested or absorbed, while venom is injected. Let's get it right next time, boys."
"...and I would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you medaling kids!"
Goes to show once more that a lot of problems would be solved if priests could just keep their hands off kids.
Little bastards didn't stand a chanceβ¦
You can explore kids groucho reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean kids brats dad jokes. There are also kids puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Verb, not adjective
Or settle down with a couple of kids.
I hate everyone elses but for some weird reason I like my own.
Measles
A couple have 13 children, 12 of them are blonde and have blue eyes, 1 has black hair and brown eyes, his name is Peter. One day the wife of the couple is dying of illness, her husband is sitting on her bed. The husband says "Our Peter is different from the other kids, does he have a different father?" His wife says yes. And, the man says, "Then, who is his dad?" Upon which his wife says, "You".
But I laugh more.
Me: No little one, this snake isn't poisonous at all
*Snake bites boy and boy immediately starts to spasm and foam at the mouth, leaving the other kids watching, horrified*
Me: However, this snake is venomous. Venom is always injected, poison is ingested or absorbed through the skin. Let's get it right next time lads
They've left those kids a loan.
Remember kids, 'Netflix and Chill' is only one "D" away from 'Netflix and Child.'
No matter how kind you are, German kids are kinder.
Napalm
They are not gonna like it.
Apparently she left me two days ago.
They picked pizza. Then I made tacos because they don't live in a swing state.
My kids really liked her but my wife seemed mad.
Because I want to shoot kids inside you.
But no one criticized Laura Bush for wanting to teach kids how to read
I think all kids should be forced to read it.
"Let's eat punctuation"
Kid 1: I bet you're a virgin
Kid 2: I was a virgin, until last night!
Kid 1: Lies!
Kid 2: Ask your sister.
Kid 1: Ha! I don't have a sister!
Kid 2: You will in about nine months!
The Black Plague
I'll just get a turkey next year like normal.
A boy goes to his grandfather and says "Grandpa, how did you ever get so old?"
"Well," replies the grandfather, "every morning, I pour a teaspoon of gunpowder into my coffee, and I guess that's the reason." So the boy begins drinking coffee and doing the same.
90 years pass, and the boy dies having reached the age of 95. He left behind 3 kids, 5 grandkids, 4 great grandkids, several million dollars, and a 60 foot hole in the wall of the crematorium.
Affordable housing prices
It's that some kids would rather kill themselves than lose a bit of weight.
But when I came back home, they were still there.
She said, "You won't, but some of the smart kids might."
It's almost as if they have become trans-parent.
Rooks can only move in straight lines, whereas bishops have sex with kids.
The Anti-vaxxer is against sticking it in kids
Guard: I'm not mad, just........disappointed.
Remember, kids, never let your guard down.
Turns out it was just clique bait.
Popped on here to check messages while the kettle boils.
They got really upset and started to cry.
Scratch is a stupid name for a cat anyway..
"I would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you MedellΓn kids"
Keep kids from dying from old age, stop vaccinating today.
We think the doctor would do a way better job than us
In one ear, out the other.
Apparently, she left me two days ago...
Is it a concentration camp?
I'll have the doctor do it instead; he's trained for it.
We didn't have those fancy hazmat suits you all wear today
The prisoner cried, "I'm sorry I tried to escape!"
The guard responded, "I'm not mad, just disappointed."
Remember kids, never let your guard down.
After naming their kids after directions they're the ones going south.
Arrested for underage drinking.
Donald actually loves and supports the rioters!
Suboptimal way of letting your kids know they're adopted
he's just sitting in his wheelchair crying. kids these days are so ungrateful.
We will be telling them tonight
**victim:** please, I have kids.
**me:** nahβ I'd rather have the money.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the kids jerome jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working kids girls piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.