Kidney Stones Jokes
49 kidney stones jokes and hilarious kidney stones puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about kidney stones that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Kidney Stones Short Jokes
Short kidney stones jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The kidney stones humour may include short passing kidney stone jokes also.
- It's obviously worse to pass a kidney stone than giving birth to a baby. Because people always say they want another baby but no ones ever said they want another kidney stone.
- Thanos goes to his urologist. The urologist says, "Congrats Thanos, you now also have the kidney stone"
- Human-beings get rich as they grow old: Silver in Hair;
Gold in Teeth;
Sugar in Blood;
Precious Stones in Kidney;
And a never ending supply of Gas! - How do you know kidney stones are worse than pregnancy? After a a kidney stone, nobody says let's have another
- The doctor told Harry Potter to drink 2L of Water a Day, but Harry didn't listen. Harry Potter and the Kidney Stone.
- I've had kidney stones for my entire life and it seems that they'll always be there forever They're infinity stones
- Just got home from the doctor, apparently I have a couple of kidney stones... It should be okay though, he told me that *these two shall pass.*
- When did Thanos realize that his quest is actually hurting him? When he acquired the kidney stones.
- Pete Carrol has kidney stone complications. It should have been removed by surgery....
(wait for it)....
But he decided to try to pass it. - Chuck Norris passed a kidney stone once.
That stone is now known as The Death Star.
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Kidney Stones One Liners
Which kidney stones one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with kidney stones? I can suggest the ones about kidney and kidney donation.
- My girlfriend likes golden meteor showers (I have kidney stones)
- What do you call a gay guy's kidney stones? Fruity pebbles
- How do you get a kidney stone? By living a sedimentary life style.
- I passed my kidney stones with flying colors! But mostly red.
- The worst band to listen to if you have kidney problems. The Stones.
- Chuck Norris passed 6 kidney stones. Thanos used them in the Infinity Gauntlet.
- What did Phil Jackson name his kidney stone? Kobe because it never passed
- Someone asked me what I would do if I had a kidney stone ? I said I'll pass on that
- This shall not pass Your urologist about you kidney stone
- Why are GOP healthcare plans like kidney stones? They both hurt people when they pass
- It took me a couple attempts to clear out this kidney obstruction Two pees for one stone
- What do you call kidney stones made of lead? Flintstones.
- How do you call a band of people with kidney disease? The stones.
- What one stone Thanos is afraid of? Kidney.
- So I got a kidney shaped pool... It has a stone in it... :'(
Happy Kidney Stones Jokes for a Lighthearted Night with Friends
What funny jokes about kidney stones you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean stone jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make kidney stones pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you say to a guy with kidney stones?
u**... trouble!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Mom had kidney stones.
The expecting mother had a kidney stone during her pregnancy of her daughter but the stone somehow moved into the fetus, it lived in the girl until she was 12 when it came out during a pee.
She had another daughter and the same thing happened with the kidney stone and again she had a pee at 12 and it came out.
She then had a boy and again he had her kidney stone and when he was 12...."Mom! you'll never guess what happened?"
"Did you pee out the kidney stone?"
"What? no, I was m**... and I shot the dog!"
What did King Solomon say when his doctor told him he had a kidney stone?
"This, too, shall pass."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
m**... Jagger's Big Announcement
As m**... and his fellow musicians continue to age, they've decided on a new name for the group:
"The Rolling Kidney Stones"
If Socrates had kidney problems
He could find a philosopher's stone
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Father Dave took a seat on the A train in NYC...
and was disgusted to see a drunk sitting across from him. The disheveled smelly man was wearing a t-shirt with a photo of a n**... lady on it and he reeked of alcohol. The drunk stared at the priest for a few minutes and then blurted out "Father, what causes migraines and kidney stones?" THe priest glared at the man and said "Spending time with loose women and drinking alcohol!" The drunk went quietly back to his newspaper. After a moment, the priest felt bad and said, "I am sorry. How long have you had these issues for?" The drunk replied "I don't have these issues. I read in the paper that the Pope does."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What happens when a kidney smokes w**...?
It gets kidney s**....
As told by my 11 year old son.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What did the pee say when it was blocked by a kidney stone?
"u**... my way."
A man walks into a bar and says I'm here to drink my troubles away!
Well you've come to the right place. says the bartender, What'll it be?
The man replies One water please
Just a water??
Yeah, I have kidney stones.
