The Best 32 Kidney Stone Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Kidney Stone jokes. There are some kidney stone quarried jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these kidney stone bone marrow puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Kidney Stone Jokes and Puns

It's obviously worse to pass a kidney stone than giving birth to a baby.

Because people always say they want another baby but no ones ever said they want another kidney stone.

Thanos goes to his urologist.

The urologist says, "Congrats Thanos, you now also have the kidney stone"

My girlfriend likes golden meteor showers

(I have kidney stones)

Human-beings get rich as they grow old:

Silver in Hair;
Gold in Teeth;
Sugar in Blood;
Precious Stones in Kidney;
And a never ending supply of Gas!

What do you call a gay guy's kidney stones?

Fruity pebbles


What do you say to a guy with kidney stones?

Urine trouble!

How do you get a kidney stone?

By living a sedimentary life style.

I passed my kidney stones with flying colors!

But mostly red.

What happens when a kidney smokes weed?

It gets kidney stoned.

As told by my 11 year old son.

How do you know kidney stones are worse than pregnancy?

After a a kidney stone, nobody says let's have another

The doctor told Harry Potter to drink 2L of Water a Day, but Harry didn't listen.

Harry Potter and the Kidney Stone.

You can explore kidney stone kidney transplant reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean kidney stone cold stunner dad jokes. There are also kidney stone puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Chuck Norris passed 6 kidney stones.

Thanos used them in the Infinity Gauntlet.

What did Phil Jackson name his kidney stone?

Kobe because it never passed

I've had kidney stones for my entire life and it seems that they'll always be there forever

They're infinity stones

What did the doctor say to the patient with kidney stones?

Urine trouble but it'll pass.

Someone asked me what I would do if I had a kidney stone ?

I said I'll pass on that

Chuck Norris once had the case of the kidney stones

Now they are known as the infinity stones

Chuck Norris once passed 6 kidney stones.

They were then subsequently collected by Thanos to wipe out half of all life in the universe.

This shall not pass

Your urologist about you kidney stone


My dog managed to get a kidney stone into its ejaculatory duct

It must come to pass

Why are GOP healthcare plans like kidney stones?

They both hurt people when they pass

It took me a couple attempts to clear out this kidney obstruction

Two pees for one stone

Mick Jagger's Big Announcement

As Mick and his fellow musicians continue to age, they've decided on a new name for the group:

"The Rolling Kidney Stones"

Just got home from the doctor, apparently I have a couple of kidney stones...

It should be okay though, he told me that *these two shall pass.*

How do you call a band of people with kidney disease?

The stones.

When did Thanos realize that his quest is actually hurting him?

When he acquired the kidney stones.

What one stone Thanos is afraid of?

Kidney.

Found a cure for kidney stone.

Eat paper.

So I got a kidney shaped pool...

It has a stone in it... :'(

Pete Carrol has kidney stone complications.

It should have been removed by surgery....
(wait for it)....
But he decided to try to pass it.

Sticks and stones may break your bones, but Chuck Norris' glare will liquify your kidney.

Chuck Norris passed a kidney stone once.

That stone is now known as The Death Star.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the kidney stone limestone jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working kidney stone kidney transplants piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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