Kidney Donation Jokes
62 kidney donation jokes and hilarious kidney donation puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about kidney donation that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Kidney Donation Short Jokes
Short kidney donation jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The kidney donation humour may include short blood donation jokes also.
- Oh, sure. My friend donates a kidney to the City Hospital, and he's treated like some hero. I donate five kidneys and I get arrested.
- I honestly hate how a person who donates 1 kidney is considered a hero... I donated 4 and I'm somehow a criminal
- I donate 1 kidney to a hospital and everyone thinks I am a hero
I donate 10 kidneys and everyone thinks I am a monster - So when I donate a kidney I'm hailed as a hero, but when I donate 20 kidneys I get arrested? Make up your mind hospitals!
- Why can a teacher donate her adult-sized kidney to save a student? Because it's a kidney, not an adultney.
- Donate one kidney, they call you a hero. Donate two, they call you a saint. But donate three or more, and suddenly you're a monster.
- When I donated a kidney, they said I was a hero. But when I donated 7 more, they seemed a lot less appreciative.
- A guy donated a kidney and they called him a "Hero".. I donated 7 and they called me a monster
- If someone donates their kidney, they get praised for their selflessness... But if I donate five, I get arrested?
- I donated a kidney once but they turned it down when I couldn't answer where I got it from.
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Kidney Donation One Liners
Which kidney donation one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with kidney donation? I can suggest the ones about blood donor and kidney.
- Someone donates one kidney and is hailed as a hero. I donate five, and get arrested?
- If a person donates a kidney, he's a hero But when I donate 5, I get arrested.
- I tried to donate a kidney But they kept asking where I got it
- My grandfather donated his kidney and was considered a hero I donated 5 and was arrested.
- If you donate a kidney your'e a hero If you donate five you get arrested
- Someone donates a kidney, gets called a hero... I donate 5 and get arrested.
- My brother once promised to donate me his liver. Turned out he was only kidneying me.
- Anonymous philanthropist donates.. ..59 human kidneys to local hospital!
- What happened when Morgan Freeman donated his kidney? He became an o**... free man.
Kidney Donation Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about kidney donation you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean donating blood jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make kidney donation pranks.
I went to donate a kidney once..
I went in to donate a kidney once
but when I arrived at the hospital they asked me where I'd got it from
-Jimmy Carr
A Man Finds a Magic Lamp While Walking Down the Beach
He rubs the lamp and out pops a genie! The Genie says "I'll grant you three wishes BUT!!!! There is a catch. Whatever you wish for every lawyer in the world will receive double."
After thinking long and hard and about his decision the man finally answers. "I'd like a A 1963 Ferrari 250 GTO."
"Done" says the genii and snaps his fingers. The man instantly feels the weight of the keys in his pocket.
"I'd like $500,000 tax free" says the man.
"Done" Says the Genii. And the man reaches into his other pocket to find a Powerball ticket.
Finally the man takes a deep breath and wishes his third and final wish.
"I wish to donate a kidney."
The Beer-Bottle Genie
A young man is walking along the beach, when he spies a beer bottle in the sand. Picking it up, he brushes it off to see what brand it is, when a genie popped out. In a thundering voice, it proclaimed, "I am the beer bottle genie! For freeing me, I will grant you any three wishes, BUT the condition is, every lawyer in the world will get TWO of that!"
So the kid thought, and decided, "I want a briefcase filled with a million dollars!"
p**...! A briefcase instantly appeared in front if him. Meanwhile, two brief cases with a million dollars each appeared in front of every lawyer in the world.
"And for my next wish," he added, "I would like a red Porsche."
p**...! One appeared in front of him on the sand. And two Porsches appeared in the garages of every lawyer in the world.
"All right," said the genie, " for your last wish think really hard. Okay, time's up! What do you want?"
"Well," said the boy, "I've always wanted to donate a kidney..."
A man finds a lantern
One day a man finds a magic lantern and rubs it. To his surprise a genie comes out and offers him three wishes but with a catch, every lawyer in the world gets double of what he wishes for.
He says "I wish for a million dollars."
The genie replies, "Your wish is granted and now every lawyer has two million dollars."
The man wishes again, "Now I wish for a Lamborghini."
The genie replies, "Your wish is granted and now every lawyer has two Lamborghinis."
The man then thinks for a bit and says "You know what? I've always wanted to donate a kidney."
I tried to donate a kidney once...
...they wouldn't take it though because I wouldn't tell them where I got it.
A genie gives a man three wishes...
One day a man was waking along the beach when he tripped over a lamp. He turned around and kicked the lamp out of anger. A few seconds later, a genie popped out of the lamp.
Reluctantly, the genie said, "Even though you kicked me, I still have to give you three wishes. However, because of what you did, I will also give twice what you wish for to the person you hate the most: your boss."
So the man agreed and made his first wish. "I want lots of money", he said. Instantly 22 million dollars appeared in the man's bank account and 44 million appeared in his boss' account.
For his second wish, the man wished for a couple of sports cars. Instantly a Lamborghini, Ferrari and Porsche appeared. At the same time two of each car appeared outside of his boss' house.
Finally the genie said, "This is your last wish, you should choose carefully," and to this the man replied, "I've always wanted to donate a kidney..."
A man is granted one wish, but with a catch
A man unlocks a genie, and the genie tells him that he will grant him one wish, but whatever he wishes for, all lawyers in the world will be granted double.
The man thinks long and hard about his one wish, and calmly states "I wish to donate a kidney"
A man meets a Genie and gets three wishes
However any of his wishes that are granted, also come true for all the politicians in the world times two.
**Genie:** What is your first wish?
**Man:** I want a million dollars.
**Genie:** You now have a million dollars and all the worlds politician now receive two million.
**Genie:** What is your second wish?
**Man:** I want a new Mercedes.
**Genie:** You now have a new Mercedes and all the worlds politician now receive two of them.
**Genie:** What is your third and final wish?
**Man:** I want to donate a kidney.
Thought I would do something admirable this holiday season and donate a kidney
but I got nothing but grief from the Salvation Army bell ringer who's bucket I was trying to shove it in
I donated a kidney last year
Well, I never got to the donation part.. apparently I MUST state where I got it from
How come when someone donates a kidney, they get called a hero
But when I go ahead and donate five, I get arrested?
Someone donates one kidney and is hailed as a hero.
I donate s**..., and get arrested? guess the recipient has to be awake to receive it.
My wife asked if I would donate my kidney to her if she ever needed it. I said I would but there's strings attached.
..and veins and arteries.
Guy and genie in a bottle
Guy finds a bottle and opens it. Out comes the ghost and says:
"I will grant you 3 wishes but there's a catch...for every wish you make every politician in the world gets double of that."
And the guy says: "I want a Ferrari"
Ghost: "Done, plus 2 for each politician"
Guy: "I want 10 million dollars"
Ghost: "Done, plus 20 million for each politician"
Guy: "I always wanted to donate a kidney"
I don't understand when someone donates a kidney they get praised a hero,
But when I donate 5, I get arrested?
o**... donation has a n**... double standard when it comes to praise.
Some guy donates his kidney, he's praised as a hero. I donate 5, and I get arrested? Double standards smh
Why is it that when someone donates a kidney they're called kind-hearted?
But when I donate seven it is apparently "i**..." and "immoral".
I am never helping children again..
I helped them donate their kidneys and got arrested instead.
A man meets a Genie and gets three wishes.
However any of his wishes that are granted will also come true for all the
politicians in the world times two.
Genie: What is your first wish?
Man: I want a million dollars.
Genie: You now have a million dollars and all the world's politicians now
receive two million. What is your second wish?
Man: I want a new Mercedes.
Genie: You now have a new Mercedes and all the world's politicians now receive
two of them. What is your third and final wish?
Man: I want to donate a kidney.
How come that someone donates one kidney and they're a hero,
but I bring 5 in a plastic bag and I get arrested.
The world is so unfair nowadays.
I saw on the news a story of a man who donated a kidney and he was a hero. But when I donated 4 I was arrested!
Got arrested for doing a good deed
How come people can donate a kidney and get praised as heroes, but when I donate 5 I get arrested.
Someone donates a kidney and is loved and appreciated...
But when I donate 5 kidneys I get arrested...
Someone donates one kidney and they're hailed as a hero.
I donate five and suddenly I'm being arrested.
Someone donates 1 kidney is considered a hero...
I donate 5, and instantly the police has to get involved
Donate a kidney and you're a hero
Donate 5 and they keep asking whose are these? Where did you get them
Three wishes
Walking along the beach, a man finds a bottle. He rubs it and instantly, a genie appears.
I'll grant you three wishes, the genie says. There's just one condition. I'm a lawyer's genie, so for every wish you make, every lawyer in the world gets the same thing, only double.
After thinking a moment, the man says, For my first wish, I would like $10 million.
Lawyers will get $20 million, the genie reminds him.
What else do you want?
I'd love to have a red Porsche, he says. Instantly, the car appears on the beach.
What's your last wish?
Well, I've always wanted to donate a kidney.
When I donate one kidney, I am applauded as a hero...
When I donate one hundred kidneys, people start asking questions.
In Wisconsin a woman donated a kidney to a dairy farmer and he was so grateful he agreed to marry her. The preacher said: what God has joined let no man put asunder. The groom interrupted: what's asunder?
The preacher said apart. The farmer said a part of what? Apart from your wife said the now frustrated minister. The groom said s**...! I already got a part from her.
People are so ungrateful. smh.
Donate 1 kidney: everyone loves you
Donate 4 kidneys: sudden yelling
If you donate one kidney everyone praises you!
But donate five and suddenly everyone is yelling and you lose your job as a surgeon.
Sheesh!
When you donate a kidney, you are a total hero, everyone loves you
When you donate five kidneys though, people start yelling, the police gets called - sheesh
I went to donate my kidney yesterday
I went to donate my kidney yesterday... they called me a good person
I went in with 2 more today and they called the police on me
I have a friend in prison who is very kind.
Someone asked him to donate his eye, he gave it for free. Someone asked for his kidney, he also gave it for free. Another asked for his hands, he gave them both, free of charge.
My good friend was still willing to donate his legs as well but the Warden didn't approve it.
The Warden said, "That's enough! You think I didn't notice that you are trying to escape piece by piece?!"