Ketchup Bottle Jokes
30 ketchup bottle jokes and hilarious ketchup bottle puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about ketchup bottle that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Ketchup Bottle Short Jokes
Short ketchup bottle jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The ketchup bottle humour may include short ketchup jokes also.
- I dropped a huge bottle of ketchup on my foot yesterday.... It caused severe pain To-ma-toes.
- I've been hitting the bottle pretty hard recently. Still can't get the last of that ketchup out though.
- You know that sound when the ketchup bottle falls against the cabin you just closed? That's the sound of someone else's problem.
- Mental illness is on the increase... At least that's what the ketchup bottle told me this morning.
- Went to a journalists house for dinner and he'd put stickers over his ketchup, mayo and tobasco bottles. Apparently he likes to keep all his sauces anonymous.
- What does shampoo and ketchup have in common? My dad waters both down when we get to the end of the bottle.
- I forgot to check if my ketchup bottle's cap was tightened…spilled everywhere. Ah well, Heinz sight is 20/20.
- What's the difference between a girl and a ketchup bottle? I don't like when a ketchup bottle squirts.
- I have terrible eyesight, but for some reason I can see ketchup bottles really well. I guess Heinz sight is 20/20
- The metropolitan police have received information that 1 in 3 bottles of Heinz ketchup may be poisonous... They say the sauce is unreliable...
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Ketchup Bottle One Liners
Which ketchup bottle one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with ketchup bottle? I can suggest the ones about heinz ketchup and tomato ketchup.
- I've made an app to loosen the top of a ketchup bottle It's an open sauce project
- I could see every bottle of ketchup in the restaurant. Heinz sight is 20/20.
- What's sneezing on your period like? Smacking the bottom of an open ketchup bottle.
- I dropped a bottle of ketchup on my foot. It caused immense pain to ma toes.
- I get all my gossip from a ketchup bottle Its a very reliable sauce
- Shake shake shake that ketchup bottle none comes out and then alottle ...
- Getting laid for me is like getting ketchup out of a bottle easy if i have a knife
Hilarious Ketchup Bottle Jokes that Bring Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about ketchup bottle you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean beer bottle jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make ketchup bottle pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Getting girls to have s**... with me is like getting ketchup out of a bottle.
Easy when I have a knife.
I was checking out at Tesco...
I was checking out at Tesco today when I noticed the man in front of me put one item on the conveyor belt... a box of condoms. Not only did he notice me staring, but decided to make super uncomfortable eye contact. So, to lighten the mood I put my bottle of ketchup on and said, "Looks like we've both bought something to put on our sausages!".
A staggering drunk knocks over a pregnant lady who is carrying a bag of groceries...
2 eggs and a bottle of ketchup fall and break to the sidewalk. The drunk say "Sorry lady, but it would have died anyway. Its eyes were too far apart.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man walks into the ER
And the doctor asks "whats the problem?".
The man replies "Well sir, I seem to have slipped and accidentally fell onto this ketchup bottle and its definitely stuck in there. Can you help?"
The doctor looks at the patient, twists the bottle and it pops rather quickly. The doctor stares for a moment and simply says "Now explain the c**...".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I treat my wife the same way I treat a bottle of ketchup...
I always take the top off, flip it upside down, and hit it has hard as I can.
Something on our Sausages
THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED TODAY
I had to go to the corner shop to get some bread and ketchup as we ran out yesterday.
I went in got my medium warburtons loaf and the classic bottle of heinz beans and joined the queue.
When I was the second person to the counter the man in front of me put down some condoms
I then proceeded to put the ketchup directly behind the condoms
The man then looked at the condoms and ketchup and turned to look me in the eye
Then (I think it was just instinct) i said 'I see we both have something to put on our sausages
I laughed, he laughed, the cash lady laughed and the three women behind me laughed it was one of the greatest moments of my life!