Kenya Jokes

Humoristic puns and funny pick up lines

I booked an hotel in kenya on walking distance from the beach...

You can't imagine how far those kenyans will walk.
[source: philip geubels, Belgian comedian]

Two hunters fly to Kenya, where they bag six gazelles.

As the crew 
is loading the small plane to return, the pilot says the aircraft can take only four gazelles back.

"Last time, the pilot let us take all six, and he had the same plane as yours," argues the first hunter.

Reluctantly, the pilot gives in and takes off. But the little plane is too heavy, and it goes down.

Climbing out of the wreckage, the second hunter turns to the other.
"Any idea where we are?"

The first replies, "I'd say we're pretty close to where we crashed last time."

Its not surprising that Republicans lost two presidental races to Obama

In long races usually the guy from Kenya wins.

Timmy : I'm Hungary

Timmy : I'm Hungary.

Mum : Why don't you Czech the fridge.

Timmy : Ok, I'm Russian to the kitchen.

Mum : Hmm...maybe you'll find some Turkey.

Timmy : Yeah, but its all covered in Greece. Yuck !

Mum : There is Norway you can eat that.

Timmy : I know, I guess I'll just have a can of Chile.

Mum : Denmark your name on the can.

Timmy : Kenya do it for me?

Mum : Ok , I'm Ghana do it.

Timmy : Thanks, i'm so tired Iran for an hour today.

Mum : It Tokyo long enough.

Timmy : Yeah, Israelly hard sometimes !

Can you name even one East African country?

Well, Kenya?

On my recent trip to Kenya, I booked a hotel within walking distance of the beach.

You can't imagine how far the Kenyans would walk.

What do you call the western half of Kenya?

Kenya West

How dads of kenya motivates their kids?

by saying: 'kenya do this?'

I'm really glad that Obama won in 2008 and was able to be the first black president of the United States of America

his back up job was to be the first white president of Kenya.

A woman goes on a vacation by herself to a beach resort in Kenya.

She takes up sailing with this very handsome young instructor and sparks are soon flying between the two. The inevitable happened and the sailing instructor spent every single night in the woman's hotel room making passionate love to her.

On her last day the woman says to the instructor: "It's really strange, we've been together all that time and I forgot to ask your name."

"Snow", says the instructor.

The woman starts laughing.

"What's so funny?", says the instructor.

"Wait 'til I tell all my friends that I got nine inches of snow every day while I was in Kenya!"

I'm Hungary

Timmy: I'm Hungary,

Mum: Why don't you Czech the fridge.

Timmy: OK I'm Russian to the kitchen.

Mum: Hmmm.. may be you'll find some Turkey.

Timmy: Yeah but its all covered in Greece. yuck!

Mum: There is Norway you can eat that.

Timmy: I know, I guess I'll just have a can of Chile

Mum: Denmark your name on the can.

Timmy: Kenya do it for me?

Mum: OK, I'm Ghana do it.

Timmy: Thanks, i'm so tired Iran for an hour today

Mum: It Tokyo long enough.

Timmy: yeah Israelly hard sometimes...

What kind of exercises are all the rage in Kenya?

Anairobics.

Did you know Obama was from Hawaii

Kenya believe it?

Can You Name A Country?

Kenya?

Have you ever tried Kenyan food?

Neither have they.

Punchline not included.

Timmy : I'm Hungary.

Mum : Why don't you Czech the fridge.

Timmy : Ok, I'm Russian to the kitchen.

Mum : Hmm...maybe you'll find some Turkey.

Timmy : Yeah, but its all covered in Greece. Yuck !

Mum : There is Norway you can eat that.

Timmy : I know, I guess I'll just have a can of Chile.

Mum : Denmark your name on the can.

Timmy : Kenya do it for me?

Mum : Ok , I'm Ghana do it.

Timmy : Thanks, i'm so tired Iran for an hour today.

Mum : It Tokyo long enough.

Timmy : Yeah, Israelly hard sometimes !

Why did the Kenyans win the marathon?

They heard there was water at the end

Everything is at stake during this year's Ms Universe final. But Ms Kenya keeps stepping on Ms Australia's foot...

Ah! Kenya fucken not mate!

One of my empoloyee's asked if he could go on holiday to Kenya with pay!

Uganda be kidding me!

in response to a deleted post: How do you apologise when you're wrong? [knock knock joke]

Me: knock knock
(assuming they're still speaking to me and know what to say next)
Them: Who's there?
Me: Kenya Fork
Them: ...Kenya Fork who?
Me: Ken ya forg-ive me?! I'm sorry

(Works well to distract them from the fact that you were wrong about something by the lameness of the joke!)

"Hey Mom, can I move to Africa?"

"I don't know, Kenya?"

Ever had Kenyan Food?

Neither have they.

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I really love that 50 Cent!

Or as we call him in Kenya: 200 million dollars.

What are the funniest kenya jokes of all time?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking about Kenya? Well, here are the best Kenya puns to laugh out loud. Crazy and funny Kenya pick up lines to share with friends.

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