Kennedy Jokes

Funniest Kennedy Short Jokes

Short kennedy jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The kennedy humour may include short carter jokes also.

1. Under Kennedy, America went to the moon... Under Trump, America can't even get to Canada.
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   Much love from Toronto, stay safe!
2. John F Kennedy, Indira Gandhi, John Lennon... History shows if you don't want your child assassinated, don't name them after an airport.
3. I saw a clickbait article: "Watch eminem attack Trump like no President has ever been attacked." I mean... Kennedy was shot in the head... But ok.
4. Not only was John F. Kennedy's assassination an unexpected thing... It was also mind blowing.
5. How can we be sure the government wasn't involved in the Kennedy assassination? Well he's dead, isn't he?
   (Adapted from Neil Gaiman's *American Gods*)
6. The Kennedys Everyone says Teddy Kennedy was the big alcoholic of the family. But when you think about it, it was John who was taking shots in the middle of his own parade!
7. A lot of people say John F. Kennedy was goal-focused and determined... But, by the end of his presidency, his mind was all over the place.
8. Why was John F. Kennedy secretly a more successful actor than Ronald Reagan? He always knew how to take the perfect headshot.
9. What would have happened had it been Khrushchev instead of Kennedy that was assassinated? Dunno about politics, but I'm really sure Onassis would not have married the widow.
10. Kennedy, Lennon, Gandhi If you don't want you kids assassinated, don't name them after an airport.

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Kennedy One Liners

Which kennedy one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with kennedy? I can suggest the ones about administration and president.

1. "sometimes you just need a car ride to clear your head." - John. F. Kennedy
2. His original name was John Kennedy They added the F later to pay respects
3. I just read John F Kennedy's biography The end was mind blowing
4. Why did President Kennedy never get drunk? He wasn't very good at taking shots.
5. Why were Lincoln and Kennedy such good presidents? They were open-minded
6. Kennedy put a man on the moon.... Obama put a man in the ladies room.
7. Why did John F. Kennedy take a cab home? Because he had too many shots.
8. Why did John F. Kennedy die? He was too open-minded.
9. Good thing Kennedy was in Berlin when he made his famous speech, instead of Hamburg.
10. Politicians always lie... Didn't John F. Kennedy promise to serve a full term?
11. "So, Mrs. Kennedy, how was that parade?" "Mind blowing"
12. Every Half Dollar is Lee Harvey Oswald Cus each one has a headshot of Kennedy
13. Why did Jackie Kennedy go to McDonalds? Because Jack in the Box gives her nightmares.
14. "Don't stop until you're ahead of John F. Kennedy." -50 Cent
15. Did John F Kennedy get sniped because he wasn't at his keyboard? JAFK?

John Kennedy Jokes

Here is a list of funny john kennedy jokes and even better john kennedy puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Jackie Kennedy: "Not now. I have a headache." John F Kennedy: "We do this, not because it is easy, but because it is hard!"
• John F Kennedy was the smartest president America has ever had. He's the only president we know for sure had a brain.
• John F. Kennedy was feeling down one November afternoon. He decided to go on a ride to clear his head.
• John F. Kennedy bought an iPhone7 and people started calling him Dan Quayle... because Dan was No-Jack Kennedy
• Who do you think was one of the most open minded president(s) in history? I would have to say John F Kennedy and Abraham Lincoln.
• so today I found out the f in John F Kennedy was added to pay respects.
• JFK So, John F Kennedy promised us a FULL 4 year term....
  Liar
• Question about John F Kennedy Did JFK do Marilyn Monroe because she was easy? Or was it because he was hard?
• John F Kennedy lied... he said he was going to be president for four years
• President John F. Kennedy... I heard he was a POPular president.

Kennedy Assassinated Jokes

Here is a list of funny kennedy assassinated jokes and even better kennedy assassinated puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• How do we know the CIA wasn't involved in the Kennedy assassination? Well he's dead, isn't he?
• Last night was like the Kennedy assassination... ...nobody is sure how many shots there were
• The Kennedy Assassination it really blows my mind
• What was going through John F Kennedy's head when he was assassinated? a bullet

Ted Kennedy Jokes

Here is a list of funny ted kennedy jokes and even better ted kennedy puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Why was Ted Kennedy called the "Lion of the Senate"? Because he mated at will and killed without remorse.
• What was Ted Kennedy's favorite sport at Hogwarts? Chappaquidditch.
• What's the difference between John Kenndy Jr. and Ted Kennedy? Ted can swim away from an accident.

Jackie Kennedy Jokes

Here is a list of funny jackie kennedy jokes and even better jackie kennedy puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Great 1st Ladies of the United States have there own cause. Michelle Obama's: Your Truth, Melania Trump's: Be Best... Jackie Kennedy's: Take your shot
• You should see that new movie about Jackie Kennedy the ending is a real mind blower

Amusing Kennedy Jokes to Make You Laugh with Friends

What funny jokes about kennedy you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean acknowledge jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make kennedy pranks.