Keller Jokes

Following is our collection of williams humor and larson one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Keller puns for adults, dirty anderson jokes or clean peterson gags for kids.

There is an abundance of sanders jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 64 funniest jokes on keller. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any mueller witze you can hear about keller.

The Best jokes about Keller

Helen Keller once described a cheese grater as...

"The most violent book I have ever read"

What did Helen Keller say when she picked up the cheese grater?

That was the most violent book I've ever read...........

Why did Helen Keller mastutbate with one hand?

So she could moan with the other.

Hellen Keller walks into a bar.

And then a table, and then a stool.

Why couldn't anyone hear Hellen Keller scream?

She was wearing mittens.


Why does Helen Keller play piano with only one hand?

Because she uses the other one to sing

Why can't Helen Keller drive?

She's dead

What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder?

Endless love

(OC) What do you call Helen Keller punching someone?

Senseless violence.

Why could no one hear Helen Keller cry for help when she fell off a bridge?

She was wearing mittens

Did you know that Helen Keller had a dog?

Neither did she.


What was the first thing Hellen Keller noticed at the beach?

The volleyball net.

Did you know that Helen Keller had a swing set in her back yard?

Neither did she.

Why is Hellen Keller bad at driving?

Because she's dead.

What did Helen Keller say after being handed a cheese grater?

That's the worst book I ever read.

How did Helen Keller discover masturbation?

Trying to read her own lips.

Helen keller sets down a cheese grader and says...

That was the most violent book i've ever read

Did you hear about the time Helen Keller fell down a well?

Neither did she.

Why did Helen Keller play the piano with one hand?

So she could sing with the other.


Hellen Keller walks in a bar

And a wall, a chair and 3 people

Sing to the tune of "Yankee Doodle"...

Helen Keller went to town,
A-ridin' on a pony,
Stuck a feather in her hat
and called it "Hunngunnggunufffungg"

I wrote a book called Endless Love

It's about a tennis match between Stevie Wonder and Hellen Keller

Did you know Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard?

Neither did she.

How did Helen Keller lose her virginity?

Somebody left the plunger in the toilet.

Did you guys hear what happened to Helen Keller?

Neither did she.

Why didn't Helen Keller scream when she fell off the cliff?

She was wearing mittens

Why can't Helen Keller drive....

Because she's a woman.

Let's hear your best Helen Keller jokes.

Why does Helen Keller have holes in her face? She tried eating with a fork. Did you hear about the new Helen Keller Doll? You wind her up and she bumps into the furniture!

So Helen Keller walks into a bar

Then she walks into a table. Then she walks into a lamp. Then she walks into the wa- ok, you get the idea.

What did Helen Keller say when she fell into the snow?

Nothing, she was wearing mittens.

Why did Helen Keller fail her road test?

Because she was a woman

"On the plus side, I am completely immune to flash-bang grenades"

- probably Helen Keller

How did Helen Keller break her arm?

You try reading a stop sign at 60 miles an hour.

Why did Helen Keller fire her maid?

Cuz she left the plunger in the toilet. - Jackie Martling

Do you guys remember Helen Keller jokes? What's your favorite one? I'll go.

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car?

She's a woman.

How do you know if Helen Keller just masturbated?

She spits when she talks.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

Then Stevie Wonder "says wait you can walk!" Then Hellen keller says "wait you can see!"
Then hitler says "wait you're still alive!"
And that's the story about how my bartender stopped doing drugs.

Did you hear about the time Helen Keller fell into a ditch

She screamed until she was blue in the hand.

Why couldn't Helen Keller scream when she was pushed off the mountain?

She was wearing mittens.

Did you hear than Hellen Keller is the 13th most influential person of all time.

Neither did she.

How did Helen Keller pierce her ear?

She answered the stapler.


How did she pierce her other ear?


Those bastards called back.


(feel free to imagine a dulled "Huwwuh? *ka-thunk* UUUNNGHH!" right after the first punchline)

Did you know that Helen Keller lived in a huge mansion?

Neither did she

How did Helen Keller lose her arm?

Trying to read the road signs!!!

What did Helen Keller say when she fell off the cliff?

Nothing, she had her mittens on.

Wrote this while waiting for a burrito in 2009

What's the difference between Helen Keller and Susan B. Anthony?

One doesn't know her place, the other can't find it.

How do you confuse Helen Keller?

You tell her to read a basketball.

Why would Helen Keller be a terrible driver?

She's dead.

Why didn't anyone hear Helen Keller fall off a cliff?

She had mittens on.

Why isn't Helen Keller a good driver?

Because she's dead.

What happened to Helen Keller when she fell down the mountain?

She broke five fingers calling for help

Did you know Helen Keller had a swing set?

She didn't know either

TIL Helen Keller has a waterfall named after her, to celebrate her story of learning about water.

It's named Helen Keller Falls

Yankee Doodle can use other names too

Helen Keller went to town while riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it 'UGLABERPL'

Adolf Hitler went to town while riding on a pony, when someone stuck a feather in his hat, he threw it on the ground and screamed 'NIEN!'

How did Helen Keller break her arms?

She tried to read a road sign going 45mph

Hellen Keller was the first person to go to Disney land.

Don't worry, she didn't know it either.

How did Helen Keller get punished?

Her mom rearranged the living room

I read a review for this cheese grater I was buying online...

"The most violent book I've ever read" - Helen Keller

Anne Frank, Michael Jackson, and Helen Keller walk into a bar...

Just kidding they're all dead.

Why does Helen Keller wear tight jeans?

So people can read her lips.

Helen Keller

Helen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it "HERGGEHRHEHAIOUIGSGEG!"

How did Helen Keller lose her right arm?

She was trying to read the speed limit sign on the highway.

I can't see the haters.

- Helen Keller

Why is Hellen Keller a bad driver?

She's dead

What's the most violent book Helen Keller ever read?

A cheese grater

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes