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Katie Jokes

39 katie jokes and hilarious katie puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about katie that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Katie Short Jokes

Short katie jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The katie humour may include short johnny jokes also.

  1. So Katie Holmes is divorcing Tom Cruise...
    Apparently she found out that he'd been in A Few Good Men.
  2. Wife comes home from work. Wife: I left my job today, I couldn't work for that man after what he said to me.
    Husband: So what did he say.?
    Wife: "Katy, you are fired."
  3. Vincent Price was taller than Katie Price, and heavier than Alan Price I learned this on a price comparison site.
  4. So there were a lot of celebrities at the DNC including Alicia Keys and Katy Perry. Hillary was excited because they are on her iPod. Bill was excited because they were on his to-do list.
  5. What do Iron Man and Katie Price have in common? They have both had a Downey Junior Inside of them
  6. - Mum, mum! - Yes, Katie, what's going on?
    - Can an 8 year old girl become pregnant?
    - No. Of course not
    - Hooray!!
  7. The Cleveland Browns visited an orphanage last week after their loss. "It was so sad to see all the pain and hurt in their eyes." Said Katie, age 7.
  8. Ever notice how strippers' last names are always things they can't afford? Like Katie Diamond, or Sugar Health-Insurance
  9. I once dated a girl with a twin and people would asked how I could tell them apart. It's really easy. Katie liked to be on top whether Bernie didn't mind either way.
  10. When Katy Perry has the eye of the tiger it's inspiring and motivational But when I have it all of a sudden I'm endangering animals and have a lifetime ban from the zoo

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Katie One Liners

Which katie one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with katie? I can suggest the ones about contagious and john.

  1. People make mistakes That's why a pencil has an eraser and Katie has gonorrhea
  2. What did Katy Perry name her cat? Kitty Purry
  3. Whats the best thing Orlando Bloom's ever been in? Katy Perry
  4. Why did Katie Holmes get rid of her fancy car? She got tired of all that Cruise control.
  5. Which celebrity is the best at fencing? Katy Parry
  6. I'll be coming into some money When Katy Perry gets on the dollar bill
  7. What cold and fits anywhere Katie Hopkins.
  8. Why did Katie Holmes divorce Tom Cruise? She heard he was in a few good men.
  9. Katie Perry's halftime show was the only time a Lion will be in the Superbowl!
  10. How is Katy Perry like a cherry? Both are a little tart.
  11. What is a good song for 9/11? Fireworks by Katy Perry
  12. What's a lannister's favorite pop star? Katy Perry, because you're going hear her roar
  13. Why did Katie Holmes chose Jamie over Tom? Because Jamie Foxx.
  14. What did Katy Perry steal from Dr. Frankenstein's closet? The Tie of the Igor.
  15. Katy Perry blew me at half time. blew me away*

Katie Price Jokes

Here is a list of funny katie price jokes and even better katie price puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Katie Price's first task in Celebrity.... Katie Price's first task in Celebrity Big Brother is to not get pregnant or married in the next three weeks.
  • Celebrity Big Brother viewing figures have already increased by 800k since Katie Price entered the house. That's because all her ex's are now watching.
  • whats the difference between the duke of york and Katy price? the duke of York only had 10,000 men
  • Katie Price and o**... Bin Laden have topped a poll of most unpopular people to sit next to on a plane, but to be fair, with either one a b**... is guaranteed.
Katie joke, Katie Price and o**... Bin Laden have topped a poll of most unpopular people to sit next to on a pla

The Funniest Katie Jokes for a Bone-Shaking Laugh

What funny jokes about katie you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean almighty jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make katie pranks.

Sunday Morning s**...

Upon hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her grandparent's house to visit her 95 year-old grandmother and comfort her.
When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, "He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning." Horrified, Katie told her grandmother that 2 people nearly 100 years old having s**... would surely be asking for trouble.
"Oh no, my dear," replied granny. "Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding and out on the d**...." She paused to wipe away a tear, and continued, "He'd still be alive if the ice cream truck hadn't come along."

A teacher asks her class

to use the word "contagious". Roland, the teacher's pet, gets up and says, "Last year I got the measles and my mum said it was contagious."
"Well done, Roland," says the teacher.
"Can anyone else try?"
Katie, a sweet little girl with pigtails, says, "My grandma says there's a bug going round, and it's contagious."
"Well done, Katie," says the teacher. "Anyone else?"
Little Irish Sean jumps up and says in a broad Dublin accent, "Our next door neighbour is painting his house with a two inch brush, and my dad says it will take the contagious."

Who reads the news AND makes coffee?

Katie Keurig.
(I know the setup might need some work but I just like the punchline I made up.)

Bill Cosby has finally agreed to an interview to discuss the accusations of r**....

He invited Katie Couric up to his hotel room for a quick drink and a chat.

What does the baker turned counterfeiter say?

"I make my own dough".
My sister Katie came up with this one.

Katie joke, Katie Price and o**... Bin Laden have topped a poll of most unpopular people to sit next to on a pla