Fun-Filled Karen Jokes to Boost Your Mood
Mike was going to be married to Karen so his Father sat him down for a little chat...
He said, 'Mike, let me tell you something.
On my wedding night in our honeymoon suite, I took off my pants, handed them to your Mother, and said, Here, try these on.''
She did and said, 'These are too big.
I can't wear them.'
I replied, 'Exactly.. I wear the pants in
this family and I always will.'
Ever since that night, we have
never had any problems.
'Hmmm,' said Mike. He thought that might be a good thing to try.
So....On his honeymoon, Mike took off his pants and said to Karen, 'Here, try these on..!
She tried them on and said, 'These are too large. They don't fit me.'
Mike said, 'Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will.
I don't want you to ever forget that.'
Then Karen took off her p**... and handed them to Mike. She said, 'Here, you try on mine !
Mike did and said,
'I can't get into your p**....'
Karen said, 'Exactly.
And if you don't change your smart-a**... attitude, you never will.'
An officer pulls up at the scene of an accident
where a car has driven through a field, killed several livestock and crashed into a barn. He decides to interview Steve who is struggling to keep his balance and is being propped up by Karen.
"Been out for a few have we mate?" asks the officer.
"Shuure ave mate" grins Steve.
"I realise you are very drunk sir," states the officer, "but that is absolutely no excuse to let your wife drive you home!"
I hate when people talk about their kids age in weeks and months.
"Jessica said her first word at 36 weeks!"
You mean 9 months.
"Ken is 24 months!"
Deborah, he's 2.
"My baby is -26 weeks old!"
No, Karen, you miscarried.
Dave : How's the diet going?
Dave : How's the diet going?
Karen : Well, today's my cheat day
Dave : What does that mean?
Guy in bed : Don't worry about it
Policeman: "I'm very sorry, sir,..."
Policeman: I'm very sorry, sir, but it looks like your wife got hit by a bus.
Man: I'm aware of that, but Karen has a wonderful personality.
When Thanos snaps...
Avengers: Oh no, he did it he managed to get rid of half the universe we did not stop him there is no hope. We are in Endgame now.
Karen: ThE VaCCinEs TurNEd My KIdS tO DuSt !!!!!
Dane Cook Karen joke
Karen, is ALWAYS a d**....
What's the male version of a Karen called?
I don't know but a group of them is called a Senate.
An anti-vaxxer, an entitled woman, and a Karen walk into a bar
She demands to speak to the manager
The first Karen to get sick was ...
Impatient zero.
Two Karens are out having dinner
The waiter stopped by their table and said "is anything ok?"
You can explore karen suzy reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean karen kathleen dad jokes. There are also karen puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Who does a Karen yell at if her computer isn't working?
The task manager
Karen got hired to an offshore rig during the pandemic.
She's an essential oil worker now.
Why did Karen press Ctrl-Shift-Esc on her keyboard?
Because she wanted to speak to the Task Manager!
what do you call a communist karen?
sharon
5 gangsters calmly walk into a bar.
Immediately, a Karen rushes up to them and starts yelling at them to get out.
"What are you doing!?" yells the bartender. "They haven't even been here for two minutes!"
"Well," the Karen retorts. "I've heard that 5G's are bad for the environment!"
What happens when a Karen and a Boomer c**... into each other?
KaBoom!
What is a Karen called in Europe?
An American.
How many Karens did it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One.
She just holds the lightbulb in the socket and expects the rest of the world to revolve around her.
Two Karens are having lunch together
The waiter stops by and asks "Is anything okay?"
Becky discussing with her friend Karen
Becky: Last week, my uncle was taking pictures of me and asked me to climb up a ladder so he could get a better angle.
Karen: did you do it?.. it was just an excuse to see your p**....
Becky: I know. That's why I took it off before climbing the ladder.
An elderly couple are making their f**... arrangements.
They get to choose what is engraved on each other's headstones.
Husband says, "Here lies Karen. Quiet at last"
Wife says, "Here lies Kevin, stiff at last"
Karen goes to the psychic...
"Two men, Bob and Carl, both want to marry me. Who will be the lucky one?"
"You will marry Bob. Carl will be the lucky one."
I feel bad for all the nice women named Karen who have to deal with the bad stereotype of asking for managers. Sharon's too..
Because Sharon is Karen
Why did Karen push CTRL + ALT + DELETE?
She wanted the Task Manager.
Four Karens are sitting in a restaurant...
A waitress comes up to their table and says "Good afternoon ladies, is anything alright?"
What is the difference between an angel of love jumping a motorcycle through a ring of fire and a Karen?
One is a cupid stunt and the others a....
People need to stop calling me "Karen" It's so offensive.
Me: That's fine we'll go back to what we used to call you.
Karen: Thanks....
Me: You're welcome, b**....
Karens husband dies...
Karens husband dies. After a few days, she starts missing him, so she buys an Ouija board and contacts her husband.
Karen: Honey, can you listen to me?
Husband: Yes
Karen: Are you happy in afterlife?
Husband: Yes
Karen: Is it better than your life on earth?
Husband: Yes
Karen: Nice. So how's heaven?
Husband: Who said I'm in heaven?
Why did Karen press Ctrl+Alt+Delete?
She wanted to see the task manager.
Son: Dad, what's the opposite of Karen?
Dad: Umm, I don't know, Sharon...?
Son: But I thought Sharon was Karen.
Karen calls the police due to a b**... in her neighborhood
Karen: Excuse me, there's a black out in my neighborhood!
Police: Call Centerpoint Energy.
Karen: You don't understand, he's still here!
How does a Karen change a lightbulb?
She doesn't screw it in, because the world is supposed to revolve around her
Why did Karen marry Plankton?
Because now she can always speak to the manager.
A Karen went to Bethlehem.
She asked to see the manger.
Karen's 911 call
Karen was cleaning Kyle's rifle and shot him by accident. She calls 911.
"It's my husband," said Karen. "I've accidentally shot him... I've killed him," she sobbed.
"Please calm down, ma'am," the 911 operator tried to sooth her. "Can you please make sure he's actually dead?"
\[Click\] BANG!
"Okay, I've done that. What now?"
Why can't Karens get anything done on a Windows computer?
They keep summoning the Task Manager
(Sorry: this came to my mind as I was getting frustrated with my slow computer)
Karen
Police arrested two Karens yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one - and let the other off.
Her: I'm leaving. I'm sick of your constant mansplaining. I'm surprised you didn't see the writing on the wall.
Me: It's called graffiti, Karen.
Karen
My mum usually complains about everything but lately she's gotten bored of it. I guess you could say that she's past the point of Karen.
Why do white women like trading stories about asking for the manager?
Because Sharon is Karen.
Why did Karen press Ctrl-Shift-Esc?
Because she wanted to see the task manager.
What do they call a Karen in Europe?
An American.
How many Karens does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One, She just stands there holding it while the world revolves around her.
An employee at a supermarket
An overworked and underpaid employee was stocking shelves at his local supermarket. Naturally, he was very tired and didn't care about anything going on around him. Out of nowhere, an old woman with a Karen haircut comes up to him and says "hey you, tell me what those little green things in the pods are called before I hit you so hard your children have bruises. I need these for my diet." The employee, wanting nothing to do with this lady, simply rolls his head around, makes direct eye contact with the lady and says, "b**..., peas".
Karen came into my restaurant the other day and asked, "Can you tell me about the menu please?"
So I kicked her out and told her that the men I please are none of her business!!
I called a Karen a c**... the other day
She said I was a saltine her rights
Handling a Karen is like handling a crocodile.
They're only dangerous if you let them open their mouths.
English grammar
The plural of Karen is HOA.
A study by the Bureau of Consumer Protection has determined that the most common first name on consumer complaints is actually "Sharon."
My kindergarten teacher was right. Sharon is Karen.
How does Karen change a light bulb?
She puts it in and waits for the world to revolve around her
what's the difference between a Karen and a canoe?
A canoe will sometimes tip.
Today at work, some Karen told me she didn't appreciate me being so condescending towards her.
That means I talk down to people.
