The Best 69 Karate Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Karate jokes. There are some karate taekwondo jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these karate arts puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Karate Jokes and Puns

What's the difference between karate and judo?

Karate is a method of self defense and judo is what bagels are made of.

Why do indie kids suck at karate?

They never got past the white belt.

I know Karate...

...And like two other Japanese words.

Karate joke, I know Karate...

I came last in a karate competition yesterday

I was kicking myself!

I warn you not to mess with me!

I know Karate, Judo, Aikido, Jiujitsu and 22 other japanese words.


What's the difference between Karate and Judo?

Karate is a martial art and Judo is used to make bagels.

What do you get when you cross Michael Jackson with the Karate Kid?

Jacks on Jacks off

Karate joke, What do you get when you cross Michael Jackson with the Karate Kid?

Have you seen the new karate opera?

Critics are calling it sensei-tional.

What do you call it when a deer knows karate?

Tae-fawn-doe

How does the Karate Kid pleasure himself?

Wax off

Started teaching my son and his friends Karate...

I'm not qualified I just really enjoy kicking children.

You can explore karate wai reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean karate jiujitsu dad jokes. There are also karate puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


I beat a black belt at karate.

My next challenger is a green sock.

My wife says it's time I stop pretending to be The Karate Kid.

I had to put my foot down.

I used to think my Karate instructor was very wise.

However, yesterday my pregnant neighbour Mrs. Wong and her husband rushed to hospital.

When they came back today they had the baby with them so I figured I'd go say hi.

Strangest thing! The baby is Caucasian!

I couldn't believe my eyes, this whole time my instructor had been lying to me; two Wongs DO make a white!

A Chinese guy walks into a bar...

A Chinese guy walks into a bar, and sits next to Jeff, and starts drinking his beer. Jeff asks him :

• My friend, do you know any martial arts, kung fu, karate or other stuff?

• Why do you ask, is it because i'm Chinese?

• No, it's because you are drinking my beer.

My other brother-in-law died.

He was a karate expert, then joined the army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself.

Karate joke, My other brother-in-law died.

I know kung fu, tae kwan do, ninjitsu, karate, tia chi...

and a few other asian words.

My cousin, who's a karate expert, joined the Army.

First time he saluted he nearly killed himself.

My career as a karate instructor finally came to an end.

The parents found out I wasn't qualified and just enjoyed kicking children.


The karate student kept killing all his teachers...

I guess he became desenseitized

Mexican self defense

A Mexican passed a Japanese man and a Korean man as they were discussing their favorite type of martial arts.

Japanese man: I practice karate, the defense arts.

Korean man: I practice Taekwondo, teaches defense and attack.

At this point the men notice the Mexican and ask him what he practices

Mexican: Judono

Men: We have heard of Judo but not Judono, what is it?

Mexican: Well, judono if I got a gun, judono if I got a knife...

Someone was handing out certificates for a free Karate Lesson at the mall yesterday

He told me I could only Taek Won Do

I went to my favorite bar last night.

A Chinese guy sits down next to me. I ask him "hey, do you know karate or some other martial art"? He says "why, because I'm Asian"? I said "no, because you're drinking my beer".

I've always been terrible at Karate, so my Sensei told me "Wax on, Wax off."

I'm now in burning pain, but my chest is *spotless.*

What does this have to do with Karate?

TIFU by joining the army when I'm already a karate champ

Nearly killed myself when I first saluted

Yesterday in karate class whenever we were supposed to punch left I punched right

.... *long pause*

"What?"

"Idk I always mess up the punch line"

A sith lord became a karate sensei.

It was master vader

What do you call someone with no legs doing Karate?

Partial Arts.

What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Pork chop

A huge guy walks into a bar and approaches a little guy.

The huge guy karate chops the little guy on the back and says "That was a karate chop from Japan."

A little while later the same huge guy chops the little guy on the back again and says "that was a karate chop from China."

The little guy leaves the bar for a little while and when he comes back he whacks the huge guy on the back knocking him to the ground.

"Tell him that was a crowbar from Sears."

What do you call a lawyer with a black belt in karate?

A self defense attorney!

Karate

is the ancient Japanese art of getting people to buy lots of belts.

There was a man who became the karate champion on Christmas Day...

So he decided to go by the name, "The Nutcracker."

With all these celebrities getting outed for molesting kids, it's only a matter of time before Jackie Chan is exposed.

Like, do you have any idea how many times he told Jaden Smith to jacket off in the karate kid?

How do you call a bear that knows karate?

Griz Lee

I hear that if you draw a really good portrait of Jason Segel you will instantly be proficient in Karate, Taekwondo, and Jiu Jitsu

I think it has something to do with becoming a master Marshall artist

My karate teacher wore lipstick to class

He looked senseitional

...edit- but sadly his own master wouldn't talk to him. It was a sensei shun.

A Chinese man walks into a bar

A Chinese man walks into a bar and starts drinking a beer. The man next to him asks, "Do you know Kung Fu? Or Karate? Taekwondo? Any martial arts maybe?"

The Chinese man replies in disgust, "You think that just because I'm Chinese I know martial arts? That's racist!"

"Good, because you're drinking my beer," was all the Chinese man heard, before he got knocked out with a punch.

Did anybody hear about the karate champion who joined the army?

It was a disaster!

The first time he tried to salute, he nearly killed himself

What do you call an amputee trying to do karate?

Partial Arts.

I decided to teach karate to my neighbors kid

He was enthusiastic for the first two days but then quit before he could finish painting the fences

I beat a black belt at karate

My next opponent is a red sock

Have you heard of the karate black belt that went on to serve the army?

He gave himself a head injury the first time he saluted.

I advise you, don't mess with me, I know karate, kung fu, judo, tae kwon do, jujit su...

and other 28 dangerous words.

What do you call a tree that does karate

Spruce Lee

Karate student to his master: "Master Akira, why do asians all look the same?

"I am not Master Akira"

What does the karate kid do in his free time?

He wax off

What do you call a rabbi who knows karate?

Jiu Jitsu

I know karate, judo, jujitsu...

And a few more Japanese words.

Why did the Cupboard learn Karate?

for Shelf-Defense

What do you call a paraplegic who does karate?

Partial Arts.

A karate instructor was arrested after leaving the store

He was charged with chop lifting

Not to brag, but I defeated our local chess champion yesterday in less than 5 moves.

Finally my high school karate classes came in useful.

I am a natural talent

You better leave me alone! I know judo, karate, taekwondo and bunch of other Japanese words!

Blind/blonde joke

A blind guy walks into a bar, sits down, and orders a drink. After a while, he asks the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?" The bartender replies, "Sure, but before you start you should know, I'm blonde. The woman on your left is a blonde, and the man on your right has a black belt in karate and is also blonde.... Are you SURE you want to tell a blonde joke in here?" The blind man replies, "Nah, not if I have to explain it three times."

Russian karate kid be like:

Smirn on, Smirn off. Smirn on, Smirn off...

What do you call a pig that does karate?

Pork Chop.

Netflix announced another karate kid spinoff, this time the dojo trains insufferable whiney entitled children.

It's called Cobra Caillou.

What is it called when an amputee does karate?

Partial Arts

How does a computer learn karate?

With a punch card

A very drunk guy starts beating up a nun on the street

He throws kicks, uppercuts, regular punches, even some drunk karate moves.



Once he is exhausted he steps back and says "You disappoint me, Batman"

Two men got into a fight at the bar...

As one throws a punch, the other asks Do you know karate? the other man responds No . You don't strike me as someone who would

I was sat at the bar in a pub in Dublin..

..when a Chinese man comes in, sits next to me and starts drinking. I asked him " do you know any of those martial arts like karate or kung fu?"
He says "NO - why the he'll you ask me that! Is it because I am Chinese!!?"
I said "No , it's because your drinking my Guiness"

Whats the american version of a karate chop?

A Connecti Cut!

I beat a chess grandmaster in only three moves

Turns out he's pretty shit at karate.

I have a karate addiction

But I'm about to kick it

What do you call an amputee learning karate?

Partial arts

A huge guy walks into a bar, approaches a little guy and karate chops him in the back. When the little guy gets up, the huge guy says, "That was a karate chop from Korea."

"A little later, the huge guy walks back over to the little guy and karate chops him in the back. The huge guy says, "That was a karate chop from China."

The little guy leaves the bar, comes back and hits the huge guy on the back. The huge guy lies unconscious on the floor. The little guy tells the bartender, "Tell him that was a crowbar from Sears."

What do you call a lawyer who does karate?

Chop suey!

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the karate tai jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working karate judo piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes