Comical Puns & Laughs: Enjoy Fun, Witty Junior Jokes with Friends.
Why don't Junior League debutantes engage in group s**...?
Too many thank you notes to write afterwards.
Bubba and Junior were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up.
A woman walked by and asked what they were doing. "We're supposed to find the height of the flagpole," said Bubba, "but we don't have a ladder." The woman took a wrench from her purse, loosened a few bolts, and laid the pole down. Then she took a tape measure from her pocket, took a measurement and announced, "Eighteen feet, six inches," and walked away.
Junior shook his head and laughed. "Ain't that just like a dumb blonde! We ask for the height, and she gives us the length!"
True story: Two of the veterinarians at my place of employment amputated a dogs cancerous leg today.
As the junior Doctor brought the leg across the room, he shook it a little and made ghost noises.
the technician watching with me turned and said,
"I don't find that humerus"
A c**... visits an optometrist
A c**... goes to see an optometrist because he is having trouble seeing.
Optometrist: "You have a catarac"
c**...: "No, I have a rincorn continenar"
Credit to Junior from The Sopranos... and yes I know the spelling is off, but it sounds better when I read it like this.
Why did Toronto host the (hockey) World Junior Championships?
They wanted to see what a winning team looked like.
I would have won the Junior Olympics too...
..if it weren't for you medalling kids.
Russian 'Matreshka' Doll store is looking for a senior manager...
also a manager, a junior manager and a junior manager's assistant.
Custody trial
Momma bear and papa bear are in court finalizing their divorce and custody of junior bear. The judge asks junior bear who he wants to live with?
J: "do you want to live with momma bear? "
JB: "no, she beats me."
J: "do you want to stay with papa bear?"
JB: "no, he beats me too."
J: "then who will you live with?"
JB: "I want to live with the Chicago Bears, they never beat anybody!"
One day Junior brings his Grandfather to school to share his stories as a Franco-American fighter pilot during WW2
His stories are wonderfully delightful and told with a thick French accent, while gesturing wildly using his hands to describe the movement of the airplanes.
Zee fawkers fly like zees. Zen I fly like zees. Then zee fawkers fly back like zees, zen I pull up like zees. I shoots zee fawkers right out of the sky.
The teacher said, I'm sorry to interrupt, sir. I know you kids are giggling but I want to be clear that a Fokker is a type of aircraft.
The Ace said, certainmont, cherie. But zees fawkers were flying Mescherschmits.
I studied abroad the first semester of my junior year
Then she closed her blinds
So a lady was waiting at the doctor's...
The doctor is obsessed with the stars, and is a junior astrologist, so, naturally, he asks the woman what her Zodiac symbol is. She responds; "Cancer, why?". "What a coincidence..." Said the Doctor.
You can explore junior davis reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean junior fresher dad jokes. There are also junior puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
What do grammar n**... order at Burger King?
Two Whoppers Junior
A priest and a rabbi walk by a junior high school...
The priest peers inside and says "Hey. Let's go inside and screw some little boys."
The rabbi responds "Out of what?"
You hear the one about the transgender student?
He spent his Junior year a broad.
Why are junior doctors so good at bowling?
They always get strikes!
Blackbeard the pirate sends his son BB Junior to kindergarten
As its the first day, the teachers want to gauge how smart each child is.
"who can sing the Alphabet" enquires the teacher
'Y'arrrr I can" says BB Junior
"Ok BB, go ahead" the teacher encourages
BB stands up full of confidence
"A B C C C C C C C D E F..."
"Stop" the teacher interrupts "thats not right BB there is only one C"
BB looks at her as if she's an idiot
"WRONG" he retorts "THERE ARE *SEVEN C's*"
In the past, U.S.A. has had for president.....
Bush senior, Bush junior and now Bush groper.
A Chinese man goes to see an eye doctor (Racist)
After the examination, the doctor says "You have a cataract."
The Chinese guy replies, "No, I have a Rincoln Continentar."
Courtesy of Junior in the Sopranos
You hear the one about the Chinese wiseguy?
He made them an offer they couldn't understand.
Courtesy of Corrado (Junior) Soprano - *'The Sopranos'*
Did you hear? Somebody released a bunch of angry, rabid owls down at the local junior high!
I tell you, school hooting is a real problem in this country.
At this point I feel that there's probably nothing self-incriminating in his tax returns.
Or else Donald J. Trump or Junior would have tweeted it out to the public.
A little boy swallows a nickel.
His mother panics and starts hitting him hard on the back. Suddenly he coughs up two dimes. She doesn't know what to do so she calls her husband.
"Junior swallowed a nickel, and when I patted him on the back he coughed up two dimes. What do I do?" she cried.
"Keep feeding him nickels!" the father said.
I heard you liked bad boys
Well this one time I was watching Disney junior and it said to go to their website with a parents permission...
I didn't ask my parents
Russia. Little Boris comes running to his alcoholic father.
"Daddy, daddy! I just heard that v**... has risen in price. That means you'll be drinking less from now on?"
"No, junior. That means you'll be eating less," the father replies.
JOB OPENING : WE ARE LOOKING FOR A JUNIOR WORKER WITH EXPERIENCE OF SENIOR WORKER WITH PAY OF A INTERN
Told my dad that 12 boys from a junior football team are lost in a flooded cave in Thailand.
Dad: He told me they should call a priest.
Me: Dad! They could still be alive.
Dad: Yes I believe that they are still alive as well, just toss a priest in the cave and he'll find those boys real quick.
Cuba Gooding Junior hosting Family Fued
Cuba: Name something you keep in your wallet
Me: The Money
Cuba: Ok then... Show me The Money
The crusty old managing partner finally passed away, but his firm kept receiving calls asking to speak with him.
"I'm sorry, he's dead," was the standard answer.
Finally, the receptionist who fielded the calls began to realize it was always the same voice, so she asked who it was and why he kept calling.
The reply: "I used to be one of his junior associates, and I just like to hear you say it."
The CEO of a large cooperation was giving advice to a junior executive.
"I was young, married and out of work," he lectured. "I took the last nickel I had and bought an apple. I polished it and sold it for a dime. The next day I bought two apples, polished them and sold them for ten cents each."
"I see," said the junior executive. "You kept reinvesting your money and grew a big business."
"No," said the CEO. "Then my wife's father died and left me a fortune."
If I knew a kid named Roy that wore corduroys back in junior high school, we'd still be calling him corridor Roy to this day.
What do Iron Man and Katie Price have in common?
They have both had a Downey Junior Inside of them
Why doesn't The Junior League have o**...?
too many Thank-You notes.
The best b**... I ever got was in junior high.
God I love being a teacher
Work ad: Russian matryoshka doll factory is looking for
a head manager, a manager, a junior manager, and an assistant junior manager.
I forgot to add Junior Mafia to my hip hip playlist
Oh well. No Biggie
Young man fresh out of college gets a job at a factory
When he arrives he surprised that he is assigned as junior janitor. Shocked he asks for the manager who hired him. Didn't you read I have a double major in Social Science and Anthropology
Oh says the man, I must have missed that. OK let me explain. Lift the mop up and put in the bucket, then wipe the dirty floor with it.
A before Viagara Joke
One day Grandpa was watching Junior playing with an earthworm. Grandpa said, " Junior, I will give you $10 if you can put that worm back down in its hole."
The kids thinks and thinks, then runs into the house and returns with a can of hair spray. He sprays the worn all over and as it gets stiff he stuffs it down into the hole. Grandpa gives the boy $10.
The next day Grandpa comes out to where Junior is playing and gives the boy $20. The boy looked up in confusion and asked, "What's this for?"
Grandpa smiles and says, "That's from Grandma!"
Homecomeback
It was the annual homecoming dance at the local high school gym. Most of the young folk were out on the dance floor but a few young men and women lined the sides of the gym, hoping for a dance partner to ask them out onto the dance floor. After waiting anxiously for quite a while, a rather awkward freshman finally got up the nerve to ask a pretty junior for a dance at the homecoming. She gave him the once-over and said, "Sorry, I won't dance with a child." "Please forgive me," responded the underclassman. "I didn't realize you were pregnant."
I recently rejected a junior software dev job at IKEA.
I kinda know java, kotlin and some php but unfortunately Assembly was required.
